- Date posted
- 2y
Go do something you love!
So this morning, I was having quite a bit of anxiety and I was having the usual intrusive thoughts and all that comes with them. And at work I was listening to a podcast about my particular “theme” of OCD which initially was a total compulsion on my part, because I listened to it in an effort to bring down my anxiety. But at the end of the episode, the host, who is a licensed therapist and OCD specialist, went through a imaginative exposure type thingy, and I was at work so I didn’t really get to sit down and truly follow along, but nonetheless it made me anxious and got the anxiety going again. But something that this guy kept saying was “notice how you’re feeling right now. It doesn’t matter if it’s good or bad, don’t label it. Just allow yourself to have that thought and to feel however you feel about it.” And honestly, I was at a point where I was willing to do anything to get these thoughts to go away. 😂 So I sat with those thoughts and it was super uncomfortable but I didn’t fight them, I just said “okay”, and then didn’t do a compulsion after that. I think I did ERP correctly for the first time! It didn’t feel good in the moment, but now, some hours later, I feel really good! Now for the original reason for my post. After work, I decided I was gonna go mountain biking. It’s something I’ve loved doing for over 10 years and it’s probably my favorite hobby. And I just went, and chose not to be afraid of my intrusive thoughts and just let what ever thoughts were to come to just be there. And I found myself having the thoughts, but focusing way more on how much fun I was having hitting these jumps on my mountain bike. I feel more like myself tonight than I’ve felt in months. I feel genuinely me! Not the obsessive compulsive me. And it’s a dang good feeling. It took me so long to build up the courage to allow the thoughts to be there and to lean into them. But leaning into them and allowing them to be there without attaching any meaning to them will help you so much. Try it!