I feel like I lost myself. I over think my favorite color. I cant name a top favorite song of mine. I don’t know what’s my favorite food or drink. I don’t know who I have a crush on. I don’t know who my real friends are. I just feel like I’m a stranger to myself.
i felt this for so long. it’s because you’ve been trapped in what OCD’s favourite things are, not yours. you’ve been stripped of your own interests because you’ve been constantly forced to cater to OCD’s interests. take the time to work out who you are again, there’s no rush. i’m proud of you. hope you’re doing okay :)
Wow, that's a powerful insight.....I think that's probably very true, and for me I think it's the sort of dissociation, depression, and numbness associated with OCD where I also feel much more disconnected from myself.
I feel ya! For me I think? OCD and surrounding emotions may cause some types of dissociation, numbness and depersonalization........ I often feel like "half a human". I can feel more disconnected from the things I love, they don't "feel" as real........ And sometimes yeah my brain is so foggy or mushy or whatever I don't "feel" like I have any clarity on what I like... I do still love people, I think some of my mental health challenges can impact that quite a bit, but I do....... I feel love for my cat quite a bit which I'm really grateful for......I do have certain times or moments I feel more love for things and people, it's not as frequent but it IS important for me to recognize that I do still feel love and connection with people, even if it's not nearly as frequent and at same capacity majority of time. I've found what seems to help is I will just keep on doing things I did like and I'm "pretty sure" I still like - dancing, playing volleyball, going to movies and such..... The best thing I can usually do is not spend much time at all fixated on how much I "feel". like I like it, or esp. difficult for me was comparing how I feel now to how it "used to" feel. Eventually these activities became routines and I found enjoyment in them (even if it wasn't the same level of enjoyment)...I think the bigger thing for me was to really just keep doing them and not spending too much time with the whole analysis part....
it feels like the fear i once knew it wasnt real now it is, it feels like i dont like him anymore and that i have changed. i am numb.
So i started to feel like a lesbian again and that i have to be one. I dont want to be one. I just dont. But being straight feel like a lie now. I question my whole life, my feelings and everything. The biggest indicator of this must be that i will be slowly 21 year old and ive never dated anyone and i dont really find anyone attractive and i dont even know if i truly was attracted to someone and im scared of relationships i might have trauma or have anxious avoidant attachment. Help me. I do feel lost. Really lost. I dont know who am I anymore. I feel like that i must have been gay my whole life now. I feel like an alien. I sometimes feel like 2 people are living inside of me.😞😞😞
Makes me feel lost. I feel like I don't know who I am anymore.
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