I keep questioning if i like my partner and daugther? And if i like anything i used to love… its like i can’t feel joy when im being with the ones i love anymore??? Is this normal ocd??
I feel like this with my partner. Like I am the one responsible for sucking all joy out of the relationship. Instead of doing things to make things better I just freeze and become quiet. When I get like this I need activities to distract me that don't require much effort e.g. going to the cinema together or meeting with friends for a bit. It's not a cure, but it stops things from getting worse and gives me necessary time to see things a bit clearer.
@TheBeachFromHere But what is it? Ocd compulsive feelings?
@Ohhnocd - I have relationship OCD so we could be celebrating my birthday and instead of enjoying the moment I am crippled by intrusive thoughts about my partner. Which in turn makes me feel sad and she can't understand why I am unhappy when it's supposed to be a happy moment. This makes me feel guilty and I spiral from there. It's the constant mental checking or "reassurance trap" that gives me sadness and exhaustion. Am I attracted to her? Would I be happier with someone else? The need to know 100% for sure. I'm still in therapy so I don't get it right all the time. CBT has been useful. Also the book "Needing to know for sure" was a great comfort as I could read examples of other people that had similar thinking patterns. The most helpful thing for me has been to remind myself that OCD is a disorder. From there you can start to be kinder to yourself.
You're probably just depressed. Depression on top of OCD is an entirely different can of worms. You still need ERP to deal with the feelings overall, but you may need help breaking through feeling flatlined. If you can summon the energy, do the opposite of what your brain is telling you to do. Go outside and do vigorous exercis.
@Asdfjklz Ever since i got ocd i felt this way… so i don’t think i have a depression… but sure it can be
@Asdfjklz Its mostly in the morning
@Ohhnocd I also get that in the morning. In fact, I often feel my worst in the morning. I think it has to do with Cortisol adding to the problem. But this seems like textbook OCD. You will lose interest in the things you like, sometimes you'll even feel disgust for them and that's OCD trying to drive you away from a healthy outlet to "save" you.
@Asdfjklz Why would ocd try to drive me away from it? Just to make me sad?
@Ohhnocd It's usually a personal reason for each person. One example is that socializing with a really anxious or depressed person is bound to be a completely different quality of conversation than if you were to converse with someone who feels fine. It sounds like it's a defense mechanism. Maybe subconsciously you don't want certain people to see you at your lowest so your brain feels the need to avoid them. You would have a better idea than any of us what your case is.
Yes. Ocd can make you feel everything you don’t want
Its not the relationship it’s OCD. ERP is the only thing that’s worked for me.
@Honeyshark How do i erp… cant feel stuff in my relationship? And can feel joy often?
I’m really anxious because I know my ocd is really bad right now so I shouldn’t try to figure it out cause my thinking is a mess but I’ve been having feelings of like I’m not sure if I love him anymore or worrying that I haven’t felt a lot like numb (a lot because ocd has been getting worse and worse) and thinking of like how I’ve been focusing on the negatives and only been looking at him through that lens and analyzing and also feeling like I don’t want this anymore. Basically just like negative thinking in feeling like I’m really scared it’s that it’s I don’t love him cause I don’t want it to be over and the thought of having someone replace him makes me ill. But like it feels like I’m not seeing him how I used to and it makes me upset. Today I was near someone I was like oh this person is cute and then I was thinking that the possibility of meeting someone new sounds exciting and now I’m freaking out because this in combination with feeling like maybe I don’t love him anymore is bad. Also my thoughts keep changing. and like sometimes it feels like I don’t care at all and this has happened but like worst it’s ever been and then other times I’m like I do care I do still feel. I’m just really anxious has anyone else felt this before and it was still ocd? 😭😭
Do you ever feel like you wonder if your ocd would be less if you were with someone else? Or would it be better if you were with someone else? I’m really upset because I used to be able to enjoy myself even with the anxiety and now it’s like i am just analyzing and I don’t have feelings and I’m irritated because there’s things that frustrate me about him that I don’t like and my brain says if I was with someone else I would be able to deal with those things better and that we just aren’t right for each other. And the thoughts that used to make me anxious about breaking up don’t like it’s really me that feels it. I know no relationship is perfect but it’s like my brain keeps saying with someone else I wouldn’t feel like this or I would but I’d be able to handle it better. It feels like I have to just start fresh with someone new cause the ocd got too into this to the point where I don’t feel or even know what’s real. It feels like fear and anxiety and just being so into this has just made me feel not into this anymore but idk if I’m thinking right. It’s also just warped the way I see him like I only see the negatives and my brain keeps saying you don’t feel this cause it’s wrong. And it’s depressing bc of how happy and safe I used to feel. I’m supposed to see him soon and it’s like I want to but also don’t because I feel like things have changed unless that’s just something I made in my head and cause I don’t feel the feelings I used to. But then I think I will just be this way with someone else but then my brain says otherwise and it’s so confusing. People keep telling me not to make decisions because I’m fogged but it feels like I’m not. Like my brain is manipulating me. And also like all the things I used to like I’ve somehow turned into like distaste which is so upsetting. I would like to think this is just ocd taking control and confusing me and distorting my perspective but I’m scared it’s not and that my feelings are gone. Has anyone experienced this but it was still ocd?
I have had ocd in my relationship for a while now. When I originally met him it was like this insane spiritual soulmate feeling and we just clicked instantly and he never judged me. I’m scared cause when I picture breaking up with my boyfriend I see myself being ok and being sad but moving on which I never was able to see before doesn’t this mean that this is what would happen or I don’t know till it happens? I still can’t imagine what life would be like without him but I just feel like I have lost feelings that I never wanted to lose. plus that’s also when I just picture knowing how people move on and how I’d just have to move on without letting myself picture processing the losses of all. I’m just really scared cause I used to think of wanting other things in someone else and what it would be like but I just thought how nice it would be to have it and not actually meaning it bc every time I thought about it I got upset and now it feels diff. He knows I have ocd but I never explained the ROCD because I thought it would have offended him so every time I went through a flare up I never told and acted like I was fine and it kept happening and OCD kept getting worse and worse. Maybe that’s part of the issue cause I haven’t been feeling like myself. But this is a feeling I never wanted to feel ever with him. I have gone through the feeling of numb but not like this. And he has a lot of positives but I can only see him overall as negatives and I’ve been told that’s ocd but it’s affecting how I feel. And yes there are legit actual things in the relationship that upset me but ocd has been affecting the way I look at him also. I keep being told my judgment is being impaired but this time it rly feels like not. And I’m Scared why don’t memories and things affect me like it used to doesn’t that mean I want this. Has anyone experienced this or is this the end 😭
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