Struggling with intrusive thoughts about harm and their impact, seeking help.

Harm OCD

Ive had intrusive thoughts for 2 months now..And I just remember about serial killers and now I imagine myself doing those things to my family and I feel uncomfortable looking at them. And now im questioning if I like my thoughts or not and it’s just causing me more worry I’m even googling my symptoms but nothing is show up. I also get sexual intrusive thoughts about the serial killers and it’s horrible and scary someone please help me.

Username: addyadzaddyadz

Date posted: 1y ago

hi, i have scary intrusive thoughts like this too. i know this isn’t the most helpful advice, this won’t fix everything, but i think a good tell that you don’t like your thoughts is the fact you feel negatively about them. you don’t want these thoughts, you actively don’t enjoy these thoughts, and if you truly felt you liked those thoughts they wouldn’t be intrusive thoughts at all. you aren’t depraved, or awful, your brain is acting against you. try to reassure yourself you don’t enjoy thinking these thoughts. you mentioned feeling scared, worried, uncomfortable, those feelings don’t equate with enjoying something at all. this is what helps me manage my thoughts and i hope it can help you too, you aren’t your intrusive thoughts even if it feels like theyre all you have. little steps, i believe in you.

Username: JacquelindaJacquelinda

Date posted: 1y ago

These started for me the past couple months too. I used to be really into Criminal Minds and now I can't even watch it, especially if a child is involved. I suddenly got scared of filling my mind with morbid things out of fear that it would cause intrusive thoughts even though my thoughts started randomly while I was working on a PowerPoint presentation at work. My body did something really weird & I got scared of what it meant, then the thoughts went crazy.

Username: ClydeWinterClydeWinter

Date posted: 1y ago

Thank you guys so much . I’m glad to know I’m not alone! Together we’ll get through this!

Username: ClydeWinterClydeWinter

Date posted: 1y ago

But sometimes I don’t feel anxious about them and my head tells me “they weren’t bad people” and that scares me more and I’m worried right now idk what to do

Username: addyadzaddyadz

Date posted: 1y ago

@Anonymous take some deep breaths, if its serial killers that trigger these fixations, id avoid true crime / horror media. you point something important out, its your head telling you these things. you aren’t telling yourself, you aren’t fantasizing, you’re brain is berating you. i often compare my ocd to a mosquito buzzing about, because thats what it feels like to me. just because you don’t feel anxious doesn’t mean you want them there. intrusive thoughts can pop up out of nowhere!! its why they’re intrusive, because they show up when they shouldn’t you don’t want to hurt anybody, you’re scared of doing so because your ocd is fixating on the idea of it. its hard, and its scary, but please try and remind yourself that intrusive thoughts are intrusive, they aren’t something you conjure, and they aren’t something you welcome in. you’re scared, and being scared is an awful feeling but it proves a really important thing, and thats that you aren’t embracing these fixations, you want them gone. try and find distractions for now, deep breaths and I like listening to music when my brain is a mess. I also try to close my eyes and just repeat the things I wish I could hear instead. “they were bad people” “you don’t want to hurt people” “you arent a violent person, you never have been before” “you love your friends and family” its hard to challenge ocd intrusive thoughts, but a little reassurance goes a long way. you don’t want to hurt anyone, you don’t want that at all and its clear to me. please stay safe, try and decompress

Username: flowerpetalsflowerpetals

Date posted: 1y ago

@ClydeWinter I hit a very low part of my intrusive thoughts recently where I was questioning why acting on my intrusive thoughts would be a bad thing. That thought had been eating me up alive for a week, but while I get similar thoughts, I was able to calm them down and realize that those thoughts are not me. That was never the way I thought before my intrusive thoughts came up. Blame the intrusive thoughts on your ocd and realize it’s those thought trying to get this reaction out of you. The fact that you’re questioning the anxiety you get from those thoughts as not being enough is enough to know that these thoughts are not you. I believe you’re a good person with good intentions and you should too.

Username: Taylen

Date posted: 2y ago

Harm OCD

just a couple days ago i experienced this for the first time from watching the new DAHMER series. Im having intrusive images and thoughts of me harming or killing my loved ones and its so scary because i would never do it. It has me questioning if im crazy and im having severe panic attacks over 3 times a day. Im mentally and physically drained, i’ve told my mom about it and we are going to see a therapist tomorrow. Im scared to because idk if they specialize in OCD and if i tell them my thoughts they are gonna put me in the mental hospital or say im crazy and don’t have OCD, can any therapists on here or fellow people with Harm OCD let me know if you think im showing signs of it, i just want it to go away and to be able to sleep at night without severe overthinking.

Username: Anonymous

Date posted: 30w ago

I’m scared this isn’t ocd…

It started a month ago on vacation. I started getting intrusive thoughts about harming my loved ones in their sleep and it scared me so bad. I thought it would stop but it only got worse. Here I am a month later and things have changed drastically. My thoughts have now shifted to becoming some serial killer. I am so worried it’s all I think about. I can’t stop thinking about the things I did as a kid and how it could validate all my thoughts. I don’t wanna hurt anyone or anything at all. I am so scared of the thought of the notorious serial killers that I’ve heard about in the past and I can’t stop comparing myself to these horrible people. I’m scared because I used to be mean to animals as a kid and people say this is the first thing to look for in serial killers. I remember still having a lot of empathy for them when I was young too. I look back and cant at all understand why I was like that. It makes me wanna breakdown and punch myself. All of that stopped a really long time ago and every since I have done nothing but helped and empathized with animals. I am every surrounded by them and consider them to be more family than pets. I get extremely upset over anything or anyone who is suffering. I just can’t get that memory of me doing that stuff out of my head and I’m afraid it means it validates my thoughts I’ve been having even though this is not what i want to happen. I’ve been completely avoidant of alcohol and refused to take a medication I was prescribed because irritability was a side effect and I’m afraid of snapping and hurting someone. I just can’t stop thinking about my past and how it could correlate to now. Even though I have grown up to have morals and respect for everything I have a fear that it’s all been a lie. I get so much anxiety from thinking about this stuff. I haven’t eaten in almost 3 days because my stomach is in a constant knot and when I do eat I feel too guilty to do so because I’m not paying attention to these thoughts and sometimes it makes me question whether I secretly want to do bad stuff which I don’t and that scared me so bad. I made an emergency appointment right after I started having these thoughts and they diagnosed me as having schizotypal personality disorder. They said I have been having ocd “tendencies “ because I have the thoughts and constantly googling everything which I guess would be a compulsion. I have been looking on forums for people with past actions similar to mine to see other peoples reactions. I’m not sure what this is anymore. Idk if this is ocd or I’m just using it as an excuse. All I know is that I’m extremely scared. I vowed if this stuff as everything something I would even think about doing I would take myself out before I ever hurt anyone else. It’s scary but it’s what I always tell myself when I doubt any of this.

Username: vmc76

Date posted: 29w ago

Harm OCD thoughts

Everyday i have unwanted thoughts and images in my head of me harming my loved ones in horrible ways, also urges too. i’m not like that at all, i don’t want to be like that at all and i also have an extreme fear of becoming a bad person and harming the people i love, or snapping out of anger and harming people. These thoughts scare me a lot and im really sad that i have these thoughts at all and its taking a toll on my mental health. whenever i see something like a gun or a knife or something like that i get anxious and scared at the thought that i could hurt someone with those things and i get thought about me in a position where i hurt someone. the last thing i want is to hurt anyone. i just wanna make people happy and i wanna treat others with kindness. i don’t want to do any of that i don’t wanna be a bad person. i hate these thoughts in my head and im so anxious at the thought that im gonna commit them. can someone help me and give me some advice on what to do?

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Struggling with intrusive thoughts about harm and their impact, seeking help.

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