Any tips on dealing with SOOCD while having a boyfriend and keeping that relationship strong despite the fact you might be gay or have all these thoughts and urges and uncertainty? I am so afraid I will hurt him one day, become someone completely different, and crush him and his dreams for us.
I don't have any tips other than I have a girlfriend and I adore her even if my brain is making me feel like I'm not attracted to her. As a man, my biggest issue is "performance" when I'm full on anxiety and doubting my attraction. Other than that I just roll with the punches whether I'm questioning our kissing or cuddling or conversation or wearing my anxiety on my sleeve. Im doing the best I can currently and trying harder every day
I had bad rocd before I got married “do I like my husband enuf, am I attracted enuf, what if one day I want out and hurt him?” All the while knowing I loved him. Ultimately love isn’t a feeling it’s a choice. You may sometimes feel it but the more you seek a feeling the more fleeting it can be. It might not be popular to say in todays world where there are 10000 orientations but I believe God made us male and female and his design is man goes with woman. As a married woman I can say it doesn’t mean I never think another guy is attractive, but I remain loyal to my husband. I keep God first by his grace and he helps me in every situation in life. If you have a good relationship W your boyfriend don’t let lies fears and ocd keep you eternally confused. Get help for erp, lean into your God given identity, and move on into your values. Act is helpful here (value based therapy.) 🙏🏻 you’ll get thru this!
Love this, this was great word of encouragement.
I get this all the time!! Sometimes it makes me feel like I need to break up with my boyfriend because I don’t want to hurt him if my thoughts are true but the way u see it for me is I’ve been with him for 2 and a half yearss and haven’t had a flare up of hocd until the last month. In fact in the beginning I had such bad rocd because of how much I loved him!! So if I was that in love with him this whole time then I must not be gay. Having these thoughts doesn’t take away how much you live your boyfriend Hope this helps
My soocd feels like it takes up everything in my life. The triggers are everywhere. I am a straight female, 18, and I have a wonderful boyfriend, my ROCD used to be my main theme but now it’s shifted to SOOCD. I’ve always since I was a little girl dreamt of having a “prince” and a family. And when I experienced bad ROCD I feared that when I start a family it wouldn’t be with my partner. But now with SOOCD whenever I think of my future of having a family I have intrusive thoughts about it being with a girl(really embarrassed to share that)..and I just don’t like it! I wish I didn’t have those intrusive thoughts. I’ve always loved imagining a future with my boyfriend and now I feel like OCD has just taken that over. Anyone else? It’s like the intrusive thoughts are almost instant. So annoying!! Sometimes I fear this will last forever😫even though I know it won’t.
I recently started liking this girl. She likes me and It feels amazing. I’ve been dealing with SOOCD for a while now and I was scared when I first fell for her because I knew how badly my OCD was. My OCD has flared up so much since and it tells me I don’t like this girl or that I rather be with a guy. A lot of what if questions as well. I would like to know for those in relationships and struggling with Sexual Orientation OCD, how has this affected your relationship. I don’t want to feel alone in all this. I’ve had many themes before this one and OCD is telling me it’s different this time.
I am in the process of dating a guy. It just feels right with him and deep down I know the feelings are there - my brain now tells me all the time that I’m lying to him, I’m lying to myself, I’m not allowed to tell my friends about him because I’m one big liar. It also tells me that I actually like women and not men to the extent I’m believing all those thoughts. I just cried because it felt real so I did some mental compulsions to make sure it’s still him I have feelings for. It’s all one big downward spiral today… Does anyone experiencing SOOCD during a relationship? 🥲
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