My Experience with Existential OCD

@JordTheNord I guess what’s stopping me is the thought that nothing is truly what I think it is, there is no earth, no universe, there is nothing at all. I’m basically a brain in a vat, this all could just be a simulation. The definition of solipsism is a good description of my thoughts = the view or theory that the self is all that can be known to exist.

@B_G In yoga, we call this Advaita Vedanta and it’s a source of bliss. Freedom. This is a non-dual mindset. You recognize that everything you perceive is, in a way, you because you must be there to perceive it. This is not a bad thing. This means that you are one with everyone and everything you see! This is the play of life, the grand game. When we recognize it is all meant for fun, we take it less seriously and just enjoy. Sit back and enjoy the play. You’ve got a role to play! You get to decide what role you think would be fun! I think the role of a helper, teacher, and artist is fun, so that’s how I live my life. Create your own life. Love is all there is. This is joyous existentialism!

@B_G Madam stardust had great points. Also, since I and others and including yourself had these thoughts of “am I the only one real?” Should help with dealing with it. Because trust me we all have felt that and you could even argue well these other things aren’t real and are just saying they’re saving the experience like me and we can do this all day with anything. Because like you said you only can really know about yourself and TRUST everything else. Trust yourself. Also who cares if you or me or anyone is in a simulation. Do something about it or live in it. Because even if we are in maybe something else’s dream I’m still going to be me (self) in the dream.

@JordTheNord Thank you both for the responses, they’ve helped. I had a thought this morning that was comforting in that we technically can only experience other people or our world through electrical stimuli. Without perception of these electrical stimuli, we would experience nothing at all. I’m not sure why I felt better after this thought but I did. I’m still feeling pretty bad overall but I have a prescription for Zoloft coming via mail from hims; hoping this helps as well. I’m still debating on which or any therapy service to use, it’s so expensive.

@B_G Check out Alan Watts lectures on YouTube. It’s free. He helped me with a lot.

@hhsudidjdjjs Can you elaborate?

@JordTheNord sure, i can try, although i think a huge part of this was because i was high and it triggered an impending feeling of depersonalization while i was high and watching the movie i basically kept seeing myself in all the characters but not in a relatable way in the way that our energy is equally shared as one but also none at the same time i guess?? and then i kept getting weird signs like closer to fine one of the main songs is the song i always listen to when i’m slipping into existential themes the fact that everyone is barbie and in real life too was sending me over the edge, i had a feeling like no one exists bc everyone exists and bc i am experiencing this i am meant to experience my worst fears in this lifetime as it is hell ik this prob makes no sense btw it’s hard to articulate rn for some reason but this was at the v beginning of my flare up so i consider it significant

@hhsudidjdjjs Lol being high will do that to you. Been there smoked that. Quick interjection though, if our energy is shared isn’t that relatable? We have the same energy. Also, it all made sense to me. I been down this thought process but fortunately for me it was a negative feeling it was a epiphany feeling. What you’re experiencing I believe is the truth of the paradox. If everything exists than nothing exists. I’ll elaborate just in case. If everything exists that mean there is a place where nothing exists. Also since everything is connected there is no define lines of separation which would mean nothing exists because it cannot be defined even though I just defined what cannot be defined. Our language gets in the way of understanding these concepts. Kind of like separation an illusion and illusion exist even though they by definition aren’t “real”. That might be a better example than my former

@JordTheNord ty that’s really helpful and insightful!!!

@hhsudidjdjjs My pleasure. I saw I didn’t actually type everything well myself so it happens lol glad you understood the gist. Lmk if you have other things you’d want to share or ask about.

@hhsudidjdjjs What’s interesting though is that we’re not alone in these thoughts. If I’m thinking this way , and your thinking this way then we are both aware that without either of us we can’t recognize that we exist. If we are interconnected then I think that is a beautiful thing.

@JordTheNord How are you feeling now?

@krischan405 I’m feeling pretty good. How about yourself?

@JordTheNord My existential OCD is focusing heavily on Determinism. It’s so extreme & is hitting very hard. Makes me feel very dreadful.

@sray719 I seem to go back to this theme quite a bit. I saw this thread pop up in my search. Do you still feel this way?