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I promise you, you aren’t alone. Have you tried reaching out to NOCD for therapy?

Have you tried joining an OCD support group? I’ve found that it’s a place where I feel safe sharing about my OCD struggles, among people who understand. It’s different than therapy because everyone is just there to listen and support each other, and nobody is pressuring you to do exposures or go to therapy if you aren’t ready for that. I would be happy to help you find a group if you would like!

Sometimes it’s just nice having people listen, people who get it.

I’ve been battling this emotion for about two months now. Everywhere I go and everything I do the OCD attacks and I just don’t see the point. I’ve been suffering so deeply from existential OCD. But I’ve mainly realized my mind wants control and it can’t have control or answers for the questions it’s asking. I’ve found that (in the best way I can explain it) my subconscious mind is taking my conscious mind in a trip and my conscious mind wants it to end. Like chronic pain so to say pushing me over the edge. A few things that keep me grounded. 1. When I drift into despair I don’t think about how I would end it. I don’t let anything take me there. 2. I breathe and remind myself that I need to live in the moment. The past is not here anymore and the future has yet to come. All I have is this moment. 3. I remind myself I’m a part of this universe and that I deserve to be here. 4. When I wake up in the morning I’m breathing. I don’t have to think once to breathe. I just do and among that there are tons of other things my body is doing to keep my alive without me even thinking. I respect those things. I hope this helps in some way.