TRIGGER WARNING-Contamination OCD Today started with a crazy amount of stress due to the intrusive thoughts. Have a huge issue with the toilet in general, especially the flushing without the cover on. My brain believes that bacteria and microbes in general will fly from there to me and my things, and causes a big amount of distress. I am trying to be logical with it and understand that nothing will happen. But even the thought of being covered in that makes me wanna clean everything I have and shower. Let’s be clear mum’s bleaches it every day, but still when she does and gets out to continue her chores I’m afraid she carries something that will get on me. I am sorry, this is gross to everybody, but I need to listen to voice of reason, as this is getting every day more difficult to handle.

Hello again. I'm having a bit of a struggle today... I worry about contaminating others with my "bathroom germs", and I know ERP would involve carrying on as normal say, if my shirt gets in my lap when using the washroom and touches an area of my body where there's been waste, but while rationally I know that that kind of thing isn't horrible and there's already "bathroom germs" EVERYWHERE... I am stuck. It feels morally wrong to PURPOSEFULLY go about my day despite knowing I'm "contaminated". I get lots of people don't even wash their HANDS... I don't want to participate in the germ spreading. I don't like knowing that MY grossness could be on someone. It's probably not harmful, but I feel like I don't have the right to do this, like it's disgusting and amoral somehow. A vent, I suppose. I want to start meaningful ERP but I can't get over this. Any advice? (Tagging as trigger just in case.)

Hello everyone, I'm new here and have severe contamination ocd that has been happening the past four years since I was 20. I'm 24 now and it seems to be getting worse. I don't want to be around kids because I know they're germy little gremlins and carry the main thing I fear that caused my ocd to worsen. I shower whenever anything above my chest has been touched (neck, face, hair). I wash my clothes after one wear because they feel contaminated after the use. I refuse to let people touch my bed or clean clothes. If I hear that anyone in my family is sick I freak out intensely and have to stay away from them. I also shower if I've been in public and people were coughing near me. If I don't feel like showering and that my above triggers aren't contaminated I just wash my arms up to the elbow and go to sleep because I sleep in short sleeve shirts and my arms touch everything all day. I refuse to touch my face, neck or hair after touching my phone or anything else. I bring a travel blanket with me but have to wash it after every use. I use my shoe to open doors and press the cross walk button. If I can't use my shoe I use my pinkie and immediately handsanitize sometimes twice just to have my hands feel clean. I have to use a utensil to eat when in a restaurant and would ask to change it if I see it touch anything. I work at a place that requires me to use a phone so I have to shower and wash my ear. I hold my breath when walking past people. I can't sit back in the car or on the couch because it'll contaminate my neck and hair. I also have to do a double wash with my hands to feel clean. I used to do it for 20 seconds but I do the hand wash for 20 the 1st time then 30 for the second. I can't wear purses with straps that touch my shoulders, same with back packs. And I use so much soap and lotion that don't help keep my hands moisturized. And if I get triggered by anything I sit there in a quiet rage and ramble in my head because I know saying anything out loud will have me look crazy. There are times though that I get angry and close to tears when it feels like I've been contaminated and when my family makes fun of me for things I feel I have no control over especially the intrusive thoughts, emotions, anger, fear, and tiredness I feel on a daily basis. I'm scared of doing exposure therapy because I know they'll have me touch something contaminated and have me touch my face and not wash it how does that help it'll just make me angry.

My contamination ocd has gotten so bad over the last 6 months. My roommate moved in with his girlfriend and I’m living in my own now, which makes it harder for me to suppress the urge to wash my hands. It makes me not want to do anything but stay at home. I’ve gotten to the point where I can’t even rationalize it anymore. Today for example, my girlfriend got out of the shower before me and wanted to get a new towel so put the towel on the floor. I didn’t have any clean ones except for the one that I use to wipe down my dogs feet after she steps in poop or mud or something. The towel has been run through the wash, but after using it I see that there were some brown streaks still on the towel, making me think that the towel didn’t get fully clean in the wash. It’s completely killed my mood and now I’m sitting here feeling anxious because I can’t do anything about it without feeling weird in front of my girlfriend. She’s very supportive about things like this, but I’m worried she’ll feel bad. Just wanted to vent, hoping it’ll make me feel better until I can go home and shower again