I’m struggling so bad with derealization & im so scared im in psychosis or schizophrenic. I’ve been really sick with a head cold and all my symptoms are just making everything worse and making me more scared. 🥺
Hey! I know reassurance is like the worst for OCD, but I do want to help explain what’s going on. I experienced derealization after 🍃 for a LOOONG time and it’s a sign your body is doing exactly what it’s supposed to. Derealization is part of fight or flight, and is supposed to detach you from your body in the situation that you were being eaten by a bear or something crazy like that when we were like Hunter gatherers and running around in the woods back in the day. For me, I would constantly check if I was still feeling detached from my body or in a dreamlike state, and if I noticed symptoms I would think I broke my brain, my anxiety would hit fight or flight, and then derealization would hit which mimicked the feelings I feared, and then I would be trapped in a vicious cycle. Your anxiety and derealization are linked, but again it means everything is working correctly. It’ll probably take some time, but it should eventually fade. You might continue to have these feelings throughout life because it’s normal. My therapist explained it as I had a handprint on my brain that would slowly erode away over time. I didn’t want to do anything I “liked” until I felt “100% good” so I didn’t “contaminate the things I liked with bad memories” but that kept me stuck. Rest up, and when you aren’t sick anymore keep doing the things you love no matter if derealization is present. It takes practice, but it’s worth it. I also didn’t know how to do this originally, but try to look at it without judgement. It took doing ERP myself which really hurt bad at first but ended up 1000000% worth it to figure out this skill, but maybe meditation could be a good place to start? I’ll let you explore that. It’s really scary right now and I remember being in a similar place to you. I’m sorry you have to go through this. Also make sure you don’t reread this over and over, as it could feed your OCD and make it worse maybe. Good luck! I believe in you!
@IYO24uuv? Thank you for the reply! I will keep this in mind and try to remind myself it’s just anxiety. I haven’t done erp yet & still question “if I have ocd” but I also deal with harm ocd on top of the fear of psychosis etc. it’s so draining
@Morgan_1995 That does sound super draining. I will say, the goal is to allow the possibility that it is psychosis to exist and not try to keep reminding yourself it’s just anxiety. Trying to argue it’s not psychosis will feed more into your OCD. Though, that can be a little extreme for someone to jump right into, since the anxiety that comes from that thought gets worse before it gets better. Performing certain compulsions (like trying to convince yourself you don’t have psychosis) has created this sense of temporary safety around a fear, but reinforces it. These thoughts have the same  physiological response as if you were in the room with a massive threat, like a bear. When you perform a compulsion, it teaches your body that you avoided a massive threat (hence the symptoms of intense anxiety even though you rationally know you’re okay). What Exposure and Response Prevention Therapy (ERP) does is retrains your nervous system to not view these thoughts as threats. Though, because your body is used to treating these thoughts as a massive threat to your wellbeing, when you refrain from partaking in the compulsion, your body will still react as if there’s a bear in the room. Personally, I experienced a long period of intense panic from starting ERP. The morning after my first attempt, I felt really really horrible. It was some intense panic, and I did end up asking for some reassurance. Though, I kept practicing, and I ended up noticing when allowing a threat to be there, the panic would well up and then suddenly subside. Slowly, my anxiety levels lowered, and I gained the ability to truly view a thought without judgement. I don’t know what I would do without ERP. I will say, I jumped in headfirst without a therapist, which I don’t recommend. Usually, ERP is gradually worked up to. People will make a pyramid of low level anxieties all the way to the top with their worst obsessions. They will start challenging things that cause less anxiety and work their way up, which is more realistic. There are also many other treatments for OCD I recommend you could look into. I just wanted to tell you I’ve been there, what helped me without sugar coating it, and give you some info I learned that helped me down the path of (at least partial) recovery. Harm OCD is tough, I’ve struggled with it a bit and it’s one of my friends main themes. She’s one of the kindest, gentlest people I know, and it makes me sad hearing the thoughts and images she has to deal with. I’ve also heard that a LOOOOT of people struggle with psychosis/schizophrenic themes in OCD, and luckily I stayed away from the DSM for that or my OCD would have a field day. It’s hard, and you’re very strong for dealing with this, it just sucks. One last thing, I noticed the hardest compulsions to stop were the ones that occurred mentally, like arguing with my OCD about what was really going on/morally right or checking if I was experiencing symptoms of stuff. That’s also common, so don’t feel discouraged if it’s tough. From an ERP lens, you could respond with “I don’t know” or the very intense “I agree and I don’t think I’m going to do anything about it”. There was a ted talk about “starving the OCD monster” that I remember explaining it well, as well as the OCD and Anxiety channel on YouTube run by a guy named Nate who explains these concepts well. Though, careful about reassurance seeking. Memes always helped too
My fiancé has psychosis. The biggest thing when it comes to psychotic symptoms seems to be hallucinations for her. She will see and hear things that are not really there which can be extremely scary and hard for her. If you experience these, you can speak to your doctor about antipsychotic medications like risperodone that help. If you don’t experience these it is less likely that you have something like psychosis or schizophrenia. :)
does anyone else have an intense fear of developing schizophrenia or psychosis. This has been a really heavy theme for me as well. I’m constantly checking to see if I have symptoms or if I’m gonna go crazy or develop these. it’s so scary.
I’ve never been diagnosed with OCD, but I relate so much to what people here are going through. I used to think it was just anxiety, and I felt like I could handle that. But lately I’ve been spiraling—constantly afraid that what I’m feeling is something worse, like psychosis or losing control of my mind. I feel so detached and scared, and I just want peace again. I have anxiety doing the smallest things, like the thought of waking up everyday and even eating give me straight up panic. I am afraid all the time, it’s paralyzing. And a lot of people say someone with psychosis wouldn’t worry that they’re in it, but then I convince myself I’ve been in it this whole time, and haven’t known, and that maybe I’ve been doing weird stuff. Idk. I also get really scared of labels. Even the idea of OCD makes me feel like I’ll never get better or like I’ll be stuck like this forever. I just want to be okay. If anyone has felt this way—confused, overwhelmed, or scared of what’s happening in their mind—I’d really appreciate any support or encouragement.
idk why this is such a recurrent thing for me , I get so scared through the day when I’m not distracted when I think about psychosis. or being put in a mental hospital that it gives me bad anxiety, one time I had a panic attack at the thought of having it 💔 I can’t pin point if it’s intrusive thoughts because it’s a fear of mine .. or not. I think this is the worst thought / fear I have
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