i just wanna feel connected to my partner again like i used to, now i just question everything but still wanna be with him and i also love him so very much he is the best thing that has happened to me. Like it really does suck though cause i lost my desire to even have sex due to relationship OCD
Literally same. Tell me what you like about your partner tho, let’s have a conversation.
@Formerlyanonymous i love his personality, he’s the most handsome guy out there, he’s sweet, he’s kind, he does a lot for me and so do i, he has everything i have ever wanted in a guy, he’s just perfect to me but with my relationship OCD it’s always causing doubts. what do you like about you’re partner?
@adriannaGREEN12 My partner is always there for me wherever I need him and he is so supportive of my dreams. He’s also smart and kind. He is very handsome too. Thank you for asking! What is your ocd telling you about your partner/relationship?
@Formerlyanonymous so i’ve been having thought like, “am i attracted to my partner anymore”,“he’s so handsome i don’t wanna lose him”, “do i really love him”, “i love him so much”, “why do i feel like this towards my partner”, “would i be better off alone”, and with the cause of all of this is has also given me such bad anxiety and depression, and i’ve also been having the worst depersonalization too. what thought have you been having?
@adriannaGREEN12 Sounds like you’ve been having a lot of contradictory thoughts and I have those too sometimes so I get it. Currently my obsessions are centered around if I committed too early in life and if I should’ve given myself more time to be youthful before having such a serious relationship. They are also centered around if my partner has enough of a life outside our relationship. Are you currently working with a therapist?
@Formerlyanonymous no i have not been working with one yet, but ive also been thinking the same way you’ve been thinking also, im glad im not alone.
@adriannaGREEN12 - I think working with a therapist will help you, so I hope you find a good one soon. I have also really benefited from the Youtube channel Awaken Into Love. Education about this disorder has been crucial for me. And you are so not alone. :)
@Formerlyanonymous okay i will check it out, thank you!
I am in a relatively new relationship (around 2 months) and it has been completely virtual due to varying circumstances. I have never been in a serious relationship before and my past “exes” have never been this serious or brought up any of these feelings. About a month in I started having tons of symptoms and thoughts I figured were due to an SSRI change (i eventually went back to my original med/dose) however, it has remained quite bad since. Thoughts include: -I don’t actually like my partner, I just like the feeling of being wanted -I have crushes on other people, including my partners friends who I barely know -I don’t feel butterflies so I must be losing feelings for him -I think he’s ugly/im just not attracted to him -I’m secretly a lesbian and I’m wasting his time by being with him -a general feeling of dread, wrongness, or needing out of the relationship -not being able to believe him when he reassures me about everything -all of the above is just my genuine feelings and I’m using ocd as an excuse These are obviously crazy things to think, however one of my biggest compulsions is confession and self sabotage so I have told my partner all of these things in detail. He’s really great and patient about all of it but I can tell it weighs on him. Hes even recently expressed feeling like it’s his fault and that he wonders if it wouldn’t be this bad if I was with someone else. I feel so miserable but i feel like I’d be miserable in any relationship but im scared that’s not the truth and my ocd isn’t real. When it’s good i feel the most romantic love for him I’ve ever felt toward anyone ever. He’s an incredible person but I just feel so alone and lost on what to do. I’ve literally tried to break up with him like five times and each time we’ve ended up wanting to stay together. I’m really really scared I’ll never get better or this is simply the wrong relationship for me.
for me it’s getting to the point where i don’t feel in love with my boyfriend anymore. i’m trying to keep myself from compulsing since my compulsions are all mental. it’s like the thoughts consume my mind every second of every day and i can’t catch a break. it’s like i want to be with him so bad but my brain won’t allow me. any advice?
Hi everyone, I’m a 30-year-old woman, and I’ve been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 5 years. I’ve always felt emotionally close to him — he’s caring, supportive, and we planned a future together, including having a family. I don’t want to leave him. He means so much to me. But for a while now, I’ve been obsessing over the fact that I don’t feel much sexual attraction to him anymore. It’s not like I never felt anything — when we first met, there were butterflies, excitement, emotional connection… something real. He was never “just a friend” to me. But the physical side of the relationship feels like it’s slowly faded, and I’m panicking about what that means. I keep thinking things like: – “Maybe I chose the wrong person.” – “You can’t be in love without sexual desire.” – “If I was truly in love, I would still want him.” – “What if I’ve been lying to myself this whole time?” Sometimes my body reacts — I can feel physical closeness or even arousal — but my mind shuts down and says: “no, this isn’t right.” Other times, I feel tension, resistance, or even disgust during intimacy, and I can’t tell if that’s anxiety or if something is fundamentally wrong. What makes this even more confusing is that I truly believe that real love includes sexual attraction. For me, it’s all part of one feeling — not separate. So if the attraction is gone, does that mean the love is too? Is it possible that this is still OCD — that my mind is obsessing and disconnecting me from my real feelings? Has anyone experienced something similar? Any support would mean so much. I feel so stuck between my mind and my heart.
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