- Date posted
- 1y
False Memory of cheating
Hello, Ive struggled with OCD throughout my life. The themes have changed as I gotten older but it ranges from being certain I was HIV positive to that I would have comitted terrible crimes. But I finally thought I kicked it when I went on medication and had a really great year with little to no Intrusive thoughts. But now the thoughts are back in full force because I’ve met the most wonderful woman and I’ve never felt like this for another person in my life. I’ve started to think I’ve cheated on her early in our relationship. When we first started to see each other I still talked to other people because we met on a dating site and i’m very afraid of rejection so I dated multiple people until our 5th date when I realized she is the one I want to persue. We didn’t become a couple until 3 months later because she wanted to take it slow. I’ve told her all of this that I still talked to another girl until our 5th date but after that I fell in love. I confessed to this multiple times and felt awful for weeks. Now I’ve let it go and started to Imagine that I talked to the other girl longer and that i’ve forgotten. I ruminate constantly, read old messages that confirm my story but I still can’t stop obsessing that what if I talked to another girl later. If that would be the case I could never forgive myself. I’ve beaten myself up for it for months now and it’s starting to ruin my health and relationship. I really need some advice. Please help, I don’t know what to do😓