In a vicious health OCD cycle 😭

I don’t know if this is a comparison but let me tell you a story about one of my old ocd sub types. As bizarre as it sounds I used to be scared my thoughts controlled how tall I grew. Or if I didn’t do a compulsion I would shrink. When I say this I felt tingling in my legs as I felt like I could shrink. This terrified me because just cause I felt something it made it seem real. But after exposing myself to the idea I might shrink the tingling stopped in my legs

Literally in this situation right now. Also dealing with my stomach. I have sharp pains then sometimes nausea. And I start to fixate and get so anxious. I feel dizzy and crazy. I’m afraid of going to the doctor, but feel like I should just to get a well visit. But I don’t know how to begin to talk about it. I’m trying to watch my food, because maybe it’a a sensitivity. I dunno. I’m just feeling so exhausted and hopeless. Wish I could see an end. You’re not alone. How do you feel you can use ERP for this?

This is the primary issue I struggle with. I have been a registered nurse for the past 11 years, so it's even worse because I'm almost always certain I know what I'm feeling. I had a few months where it was REALLY bad, where all I was doing was body checking, Googling and going on forums in my spare time, NOTHING else. I do feel like if something is physically bothering you, there's no harm in having it checked by a professional. One thing in my journey I've found is that sometimes you may have a condition, but it could be something very easily treatable. I have the tendency to think everything is a deadly terminal illness, and not like say, just acid reflux. During this time, I was going from specialist to specialist for months, to figure out what's "wrong" with me, absolutely convinced each time of what I had. And I could physically FEEL them every time. "Kidney problems" suddenly my back was killing me. "Brain tumor" suddenly I was actually dizzy. "Stomach cancer" I could barely keep any food down. I can go on, but I wanted to just say I couldn't really tell what was real or not until I was able to start getting treatment for my OCD. I still very much worry, I just wanted to say how much I relate. Hope you find some relief from this soon!

I'm sorry this cycle is continuing for you. I know how hard it is to be stuck in a loop. The only way to break the cycle is to stop compulsions. To stop working out, and wearing certain clothes is an avoidance behavior, which is a compulsion, and it's keeping you stuck. Trying to figure out if something is real or not is also a compulsion. My therapist and I worked on some guidelines for my health OCD - "one and done" if I asked doctor about something once, that was it. When I got home and started to doubt what he said, if he understood what I meant, if I explained it right, whatever, I had to let it go - one and done. Anything else is rumination. I know it's so hard to take the "risk". Keep in mind catastrophizing is a cognitive distortion that underlies many mental health issues. Learning to recognize when you're doing this, and stop the supporting compulsions will truly get you out of the OCD cycle.

hey, i can feel the weight of what you're going through and it sounds incredibly tough. 😔 the way these sensations pop up and the confusion about what's real and what's not must be so exhausting. you're not alone in this struggle. i've been in that relentless cycle too, and what really turned things around for me was this free AI OCD therapy tool called "unstuck" ([www.keepunstuck.com/try](http://www.keepunstuck.com/try)) that my OCD therapist recommended. it'll be especially helpful for you because it gives you personalized, step-by-step support that mimics an OCD therapist, guiding you through ERP strategies when those intrusive thoughts and physical sensations hit. i hate when people promote stuff, but i really think it can help you because it's changed my life. lmk if you have Qs or just want to talk more! <3