Would like perspective

I would love some advice: I’m wondering where this is coming from and why internally I’m feeling this way. I dated a guy for three months last year and dumped me in May. The night before he said, he adored me, then discarded me the next day. Loooooooong story short, he broke no contact six months after, and I acted like nothing ever happened. I was nice to him. I never told him I truly felt. He broke my heart. It’s been nine months and I have the urge of telling him how I feel. I don’t know what to do. I feel like I want revenge so I want to let him know that what he did was wrong, but in a classy way. Is it a control thing?, Is it a revengeful thing? Am I trying to teach him something? Do I wanna reaction?

Username: OCDFamilyOCDFamily

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

He is not worth this much of your time!

Username: Mooooni Mooooni

Date posted: 1y ago

@OCDFamily You’re so right. I appreciate the straight forwardness. He is not worth this much of my time

Username: McDuckoMcDucko

Date posted: 1y ago

I'm sorry this is happening to you. I'm currently witnessing this in someone I care about. OCD may be a primary reason you feel most of what you do about this relationship, so if you're not currently practicing ERP or on any good medications this can be very hard to navigate. From an outside of OCD perspective (that is if you have OCD relatively under control), I would seriously take into account that this person just dropped off the face of the earth. In my mind you don't get to just come back into someone's life after ghosting them like that, so if you do decide to talk again then they'd better have a really good reason for leaving you high and dry.

Username: Mooooni Mooooni

Date posted: 1y ago

@McDucko I appreciate your perspective. I was wondering what it is. I think anyone would feel this way after like you said, someone falling off the face of the earth The thing where I messed up was that after he broke no contact, I responded nicely and didn’t say anything so I feel like maybe I feel like I gave up my power. I just hate that I “feel” like I need stomp in again and say hey you did this and that. There’s no point. Everyone is different and I feel like I have to do so to completely forget and close that chapter and move on.

Username: EricOCDmeEricOCDme

Date posted: 1y ago

Hey, I can see you're going through a rough patch, and it's totally valid to feel mixed emotions following a confusing breakup, especially when there were mixed signals involved. Navigating post-relationship communications can be a tricky terrain, especially with OCD tendencies trying to dissect every angle of 'what-ifs' and 'should-haves'. If the urge to reach out or the thoughts about the breakup are looping in your head and disrupting your peace, that's a challenging spot to be in. On those tough days with OCD, one thing that has been a game-changer for me is an AI OCD therapy tool called "unstuck," which I discovered through my OCD support group. I wish I had known about it sooner because you can check it out at unstuckmyocd.com/try. It'll be especially helpful for you because the AI provides personalized, step-by-step support when OCD tries to muddle your decision-making processes, almost like having an OCD therapist in your pocket. It's a great resource to help break down those recursive thoughts and feelings you're experiencing about reaching out, seeking closure or possible revenge. If you're up for trying it or just need someone to talk to, I'm here for you. Hang in there! 🙂

Username: Leo1000

Date posted: 25w ago

Any opinion from men/woman?

I don’t need reassurance I need someone to hear me and talk to me . I’m 20 years old and I have been in a relationship for 5 years with my boyfriend we have been through a lot and still manage to be together . Recently I saw him look at some random lady’s butt at the fair . I don’t know how to let it go and I feel like my ROCD has a little bit to do with this . Anyone’s opinion ? I’d appreciate it .

Relationship OCD

Username: anon70

Date posted: 25w ago

Venting

I remember feeling guilt and trying to ‘solve’ my real event right after it happened. I remember feeling bad and thinking of every possible outcome. I think eventually I convinced myself nothing bad would happen? or I just ignored it and forgot? I honestly don’t know. After some time I think about 1-2 years it has come back up again and I can acknowledge that I did something wrong but I can’t remember all the details now. I’m terrified of what I can’t remember and I have these false memories that would take the event and make it so so much worse. I wish I could turn back time and tell myself not to forget or to just look at all the facts and have a clear view of everything. I’ve thought about killing myself so much and although I’ve confessed to the people I’m closest to and they have told me that they would still love me after all (which made me feel even worse) I still don’t think I could ever move on without knowing exactly what happened. I used to have dreams and recently obtained a great degree but now I just don’t even think I’m worthy of breathing on this earth. I just want to be someone else completely. I don’t know what I’ve done and it’s driving me insane.

Username: Anonymous

Date posted: 23w ago

respond pls!! :)

hey guys, this is going to be long but i’m trying to heal and i really really would love advice. i’m looking for help with confession ocd in romantic relationships. my question is, how do i stop myself when i have the feeling “wow this is something i REALLY need to confess. no it’s actually important this time” even though the logical part of my brain is saying all it will do is probably cause an argument and isn’t important. how do you get past that feeling of “i HAVE to say this thing because they NEED to know?” that feeling of it being so important. another question is if you do confess and you struggle with false memory, i feel like a lot of the time i say “i might have” it “i think i…”. this feels unfair to my bf because he never knows what’s real and what isn’t and NEITHER DO I!!! most of the stuff i confess is from around 2 years ago, so small details i don’t remeber. false memories can also make literally anything feel real. so when i months later after confession remever the REAL answer (i DID do this when i said i MIGHT have) how to stop from RE confessing?? sorry this was so long but i’m really trying to heal and i REALLY need advice. thank you guys!!

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