- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
Agreed. Treatment is definitely the course of action you want to take with any form of OCD. Please don't underestimate it or the necessity of it. Speaking from experience, treatment has helped me a ton. I was in between a rock and a hard place with my ocd when I started to see my psychologist. But she's been so nice and so helpful with providing articles, information, exercises and books to help me that I am really doing much better. Please take it from us. Therapy helps TONS. :) Hope this helps! Have a wonderful day and see you around the NOCD message boards!
- Date posted
- 6y
From my interpretation of what you said, I feel like you spend significant amount of time struggling with OCD. OCD will stay with you forever but once you are treated, OCD becomes manageable. If you go into remission during your treatment, your current theme goes away. Infact the only way to go into remission is when you defeat your current theme. Once a theme is defeated, there is 90%(my assumption) chance of it not coming back if you really go into remission. OCD is a parasite, you are it's host. The thought that it will stay forever or it will go away on it's own is OCD thought because it doesn't want you to get rid of it from you. I have seen and heard stories of people completely ruining their life, their relationships, their social life due to mental illnesses with no treatment. Get treatment and you will realize how much better your life and reality will become.
- Date posted
- 6y
I relate to everything you said. Not anymore but about a year ago- it gets better. I made a long post about my advice to get through it. I’m unsure if you are able to access that or find it but if you want I can copy and paste it for you?? If you’ve already seen it- just wanna at least ready out and say- I have related to EVERYTHING you said in this post, you’re not alone, and although not “cured”- OCD is a treatable disorder and can get better. Just lmk if you want me to copy and paste my advice post here if you can’t find it... things get better I know it seems like that’s not true right now but it will.
- Date posted
- 6y
How is your therapy going?
- Date posted
- 6y
I don’t go to therapy
- Date posted
- 6y
Why not?
- Date posted
- 6y
I keep thinking this’ll die out on its own
- Date posted
- 6y
It won't, if it was supposed to, it would have long time ago. Ask yourself, has things got better? Like do you spend less time obsessing? Do you do less compulsions than before? What about your anxiety? Has it gotten better? If things have gotten better over time, then maybe you are becoming your own therapist (which is the ultimate goal of any therapy). But if not, then you are just lengthening your suffering. If things haven't gotten better, you should really go to a therapist.
- Date posted
- 6y
I suppose i just can’t seem so stop questioning and analyzing. My anxiety sort of stopped. The mornings are really bad. It’s feels so damn real I can’t and don’t want to deal with this. I never thought my sexuality would be this much of an issue. I can’t do this anymore. I have a strong feeling this will stick around forever. Because I don’t want to break up with my boyfriend and date a girl. But then it feels like I do but I just don’t want to and I keep going back and forth with myself.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
hi i’m a lesbian! and i have known im a lesbian for a really long time and i have a sweet girlfriend of 1 year. it all started when i saw this masc lesbian come out as straight, after that i had my guy friend over and he’s a sweet guy and he was flirting with me (he didn’t know i was gay) im not sure but i panicked and my brain froze and i was like “do i like him”, ever since my brain has been over worked 24/7 for 2 months now and it’s spiralling constantly. im trying to control it but all these thoughts are so disgusting and my brain tries to put him and i in scenarios that make me uncomfortable and i feel panic and i hate it. i have always been comfortable being a lesbian and i still am comfortable as a lesbian, but i dislike these thoughts i have about him and men and i want it to be over. i do not want to experiment with men even tho my brain is telling me i do, i find it disgusting and i dread it, i have a sweet girlfriend and i want to be with her forever, i do not imagine anything with any men and i hate these thoughts. im scared of becoming bisexual/straight one day and i hate hearing sexuality is fluid. its a whole mix of comphet and so-ocd
- Date posted
- 21w
First I want to start off with, as a kid, my brother touched me inappropriately, I watched him do the same with my cousin, than later on I did the same to my cousin. I feel great shame for it and I have yet to forgive myself. Now, since than 10 years later, I have always loved women, fantasized about women, constantly prayed to have one and do things to be with one 1 day. I struggled with porn a lot as a kid because I was shown it at such a young age. I remember first watching lesbian porn, than moving to guy and girl, than countdowns, etc. I was so hooked that it took an identity crisis to end this porn addiction. (I have only been sober for 3 weeks.) Now I only mention this because I think my porn addiction somewhat ruined me, same way as what I did in the past did. A year ago, I started to talk to a childhood crush I had, and things felt so great. We started to get along but I knew all I wanted to do was have sex and move on as wrong as that is. I ended up falling in love with her and asked her to be my girl. 9 months in, we were having constant arguments and she had this problem where she couldn’t give me a break. We were with each other 24/7 and it felt like dealing with a sister at some point. I remember talking to my friends and asking them what would they do and they always advised me to leave but I was not willing to because I knew I loved her and the way I was feeling was temporary and couples argue. Couple weeks in, I started to have these thoughts that we weren’t going to work out and that I no longer found her attractive. I kinda ignored them because it simply wasn’t true, I still found her attractive and would get hard ons for her yet, I still had this mindset that, “Oh, there’s other hotter girls” and, “Your ex looked so much better.” and I couldn’t stop these thoughts. One day I randomly woke up and remembered what I did as a kid, my whole world felt like it flipped. The thoughts were now, “what if you don’t like her because you’re secretly gay?”. I first laughed at the thought because of how ridiculous it sounded, but than it just kept going. Two weeks from a cycle of unwanted thoughts (1st stage of my ocd), I finally got over the thought with simple toughness and determination, I did lots of research on what was going on with me and went with the, “thoughts are just thoughts” method. I was doing well until we watch a netflix documentary “American Murder: Gabby Petito” and all of a sudden my mind began to think, “What if I’m secretly a psychopath and want to kill my gf?”. For about a week straight, It’s all I was able to think about. It scared me so much and I didn’t know what to do. I started to get urges to KILL my gf. I didn’t know what to do so I left the room and crawled up in a ball, crying to god asking for help.These thoughts went away but were quickly replaced by, “You want to kill your gf because you’re just gay”. This sent me into such great panic, I couldn’t eat for days and couldn’t feel anything but anxiety. Days went by and I finally went to a doctor, at first I started to feel better as If I was getting help and things were going to be okay. The thoughts went away again as I began to start doing more things and get out of my room (head). I felt like I was back again, I was able to love my gf, I started to go to church, I felt that god was real and than boom. Here I am again and this time things have gotten really bad. I can’t stop “checking”. As soon as I wake up I check if my gf is “good” enough for me. I check my past and see if I have ever done anything that show signs of being gay. I check out other girls and guys to see whether or not I like one or the other. Even when I accepted the possibility that maybe I am just gay, my mind will fight me and tell me that I’m more than just gay. Truth is, I don’t know anymore. I’ve always loved girls and my gf. I don’t know if this is OCD anymore but I wish for my old life again. I’ve always been so proud of my sexuality and loved everything about it. I never been homophobic but gay stuff does make me uncomfortable. Each day feels like I lost another part of me. I feel like I can’t live like this anymore. I lost all my belief in god, my morals and value feel so weak, and my life is no longer a fun enjoyable thing to look forward to. I need help.
- Date posted
- 17w
I’ve been dealing with SOOCD for over a year now, and I have been having a very hard day today. I feel like I just need someone to talk too, my whole life I’ve always had girl crushes and always wanted to be romantic with women . Ever since I posted this picture on instagram and one person said I looked “zesty” in it , which is when I started obsessing about being gay . I feel like I put so much meaning to these thoughts where now I’m always checking how I feeling around men. I had a really bad porn addiction for a long time and bad anxiety which fucked up my sex drive. I feel like I doubt if I’m attracted to women when I know I am , but the doubt is so overbearing where I start to believe it . I never was interested in men sexually, and my ocd makes me feel like I like the thoughts even though I feel no pleasure out of it. I feel like I lost who I am as a person . It feels like I don’t even know what my sexuality is and it’s really upsetting to me . I meant this girl the other day and she is the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met and I just feel like ocd is getting in the way😭😭😭 please any advice or comments
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