I’m looking for an exposure to do when I see my partner and don’t feel physically attracted to him. I used to use photos when I was picking up on particular features on his face. They were very useful, but now they are no longer as distressing for me. I am now getting more distressed as a whole seeing his face rather than particular features. Any suggestions?
when you look at old photos to help regain your attraction it’s only going to make it worse and make the feelings more intense, I feel like maybe even sit with the thoughts and feel as much as you can before it gets too much :)
@ocdsufferer101 This is true! But I’m trying to look at photos where I don’t think he looks attractive.
@songbird1 I feel like compulsions lose helpfulness after a while ! Then you subconsciously look for something new to help, this is the reason why it’s not working anymore !
@ocdsufferer101 Oh, so it’s like I might not ACTUALLY be looking for a new exposure but just compulsively looking for something to help me with my discomfort? That kind of makes sense, and I could see that being the case.
@songbird1 Yes definitely, the exposure you were once using hasn’t been working as well as it once did so naturally the ocd tries to make it a bigger thing for you
@ocdsufferer101 This makes a lot of sense. Thanks for explaining this to me!
hey, i'm really sorry you're going through this right now, i totally get how tough ocd can be. just a heads-up, i'm not a therapist, just here to listen and maybe share what's worked for me. 🌟 omg i almost forgot, have you heard about unstuck? it's this new ai-powered therapy tool for ocd, made by therapists. my own therapist suggested it to me and it's been super helpful in breaking out of those thought spirals. might be worth a look, just search unstuck app for ocd. 👀
@NanaShelly79 Thanks for the recommendation! I will definitely look it up! I have a hard time not ruminating, and it doesn’t even make me feel better. If anything, it makes me feel more uncomfortable now.
Those are compulsions. Your ocd is trying to get you to solve the problem of you " not being attracted to him". Your ocd is being sneaky and making you do a compulsion. I'd do some response prevention. It's crazy but I'd say " oh I don't find him attractive? Great that's cool. I love ugly men. He might even have a wort on his nose that's going to pop out. And his blah blah blah ,(insert something here, his this ir that) is so gross. I love jt. Oh and I noticed one ear is a centimeter higher than the other one. I say stupid insane little Itty things because eventually ocd will go there so why not beat it to the punch!.
What’s an exposure I can do for physical symptoms? Part of my OCD/anxiety is getting brain fog, tension in my body that associate bad thoughts of going crazy, never getting peace, never experiencing happiness again.
Could people share the different ways they practice exposure?
Do you have any ideas/inspiration for exposures on partner-focused ROCD? I struggle with my partners physical flaws, it's very distressing for me even though I find it ridiculous that a simple thing like hair or face shape can cause me so much irritation. Furthermore I sometimes have problems with my partners behaviour, like making a lot of jokes or behing a bit hyperactive (this is mainly the case when I don't feel good/feel tired etc). I stopped confessing to people how I feel about his flaws. My main ritual is to constantly look at or think about the things that are bothering me and check my feeling. I ask myself If that means we are not compatible or if I don't find him attractive (enough), at the same time I have a lot of shame. I really want to work on this because I don't want this to destroy the wonderful thing I have. So I think I need to start doing the work. I'll also see him this Friday for the first time in over a month (due to ldr) and I'm a bit nervous how things will go. Any advice?
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