I just feel a complete weirdo for my actions, I’ve made mistakes with females and I’m scared I went too far this one night on my own intoxicated and feel I done something horrible, what shall I do
I have a false memory at the moment it’s horrible, I’ve convinced myself I’ve seriously cheated on my wife. A women touched my groinal area a few years ago whilst on a dance floor, it couldn’t have been more than a few seconds, but now I’m worrying she did more. I’ve got no evidence to support this, I can remember everything else other than her doing somthing bad - yet I still believe it and feel really anxious. But the reality is - it didn’t happen however real it feels. With you OCD is involved - you know that. OCD attacks your values - so whatever your worried that you have done or not done - the fact it’s worrying you shows it’s against your character. Do you think bad people worry about doing bad things? No they relish in them Your not that
@Jonathan123147 Thankyou for this comment it has helped, I just wish I went to the police a week or so after the night so that cctv was still saved etc. It’s making me feel terrible that I should’ve went to the police sooner, I feel I done it but then turned into a nice person after that night
@ Anonymous Do you feel you have done something to someone?
@Jonathan123147 Yeah I just got rape stuck in my head and full of guilt
@Jonathan123147 I can’t carry on this has haunted me for over a year I’m screwed and struggle to wake up everyday
Feelings are not facts Feeling you have done something wrong doesn’t mean you have. I heard this line of reasoning that helped me. With false memory we doubt if we have done something wrong - but the one thing that is always missing is the memory of actually doing the thing thing you think you have done
@Jonathan123147 I just feel horrible for past mistakes and I felt this night was the finale, I kept quiet about it so street cctv etc was going to be deleted the longer I left it and I actually knew I done it, I’m scared of it all
@ Anonymous If you want you can talk about it - but the fact you are on this app shows you know on some level this is ocd
@Jonathan123147 I’m scared because I was spiralling in making awful mistakes that would put me in jail, I just don’t know if it’s OCD because alcohol was involved
OCD will be making you think it’s worse than it is
@Jonathan123147 It’s like hell 24/7
Try speaking to a therapist, ocd will always make things seem massive where there not
@Jonathan123147 Thankyou, hope your keeping well?
@Jonathan123147 Are you from the uk?
Yes
@Jonathan123147 When I truly think about it I am guilty and for the first 4 months I knew I was then I stumbled across a theme of false memory etc. but deep down always knew I was guilty, just don’t understand why it hasn’t came out with the police etc
If you want to talk to me about it you can I can send you my email. Or I recommend you speaking to a therapist, if you live in the UK you can self refer yourself to a therapist and it’s free
@Jonathan123147 How’d do I go about doing that please, I’ll talk about it to you too I’m just fed up of feeling terrible and constantly full of guilt
How old are you?
@Jonathan123147 22 hold old are you?
@Jonathan123147 How*
Yes sorry how old are you
@Jonathan123147 I’m 22 , how old are you?
I’m 38 My email is Jonathan_brogan@hotmail.com
@Jonathan123147 I just feel terrible about it all I felt so bad for so long over this
If you google nhs self referral for physiological services
@Jonathan123147 I’m getting visual flashbacks from that night is that normal
False memory can play tricks on us it can feel very real
@Jonathan123147 I just feel i’m Just scared to tell my parents and waiting for them to scream at me then I can move on
I’m a 23 y/o female who has recently entered a phase of obsessive thoughts of mistakes I’ve made, ranging from events that happened over a decade ago when and I was a kid up to things that happened recently. I feel so much debilitating guilt I can’t do anything or function. I especially feel bad for this one instance. I have always had extremely low self esteem, and I often seek attention and validation especially from men. I like being liked. I find myself trying to act or look cute, or even act somewhat like a pick-me, so that I feel liked. I feel like I may even do this with girls too, but especially guys. I just really like attention, and I’ve been in a stagnant 6 year relationship where I don’t really feel desirable, and I’m very lonely. A few months ago I started playing a game where I met a large group of people and we would all play together everyday. One of the people in particular was a 15/16 year old guy who flirted with me a lot, and I kept my distance because he was so young, and I felt kinda weird talking to someone younger than me, but we would still talk sometimes because we were apart of the same discord group, and I have a problem being stern and confrontational so I didn’t want to be mean or make things awkward in the friend group. Although it made me uncomfortable that he was so young and that I’m nearly a whole decade older than him, and I did make it clear that I was dating someone and I was way too old for him and I would tell him to stop, I wasn’t very stern and I was very lighthearted about it and I even found myself liking the attention I got from him. I was flattered. I liked that he liked me so much even though I knew he was a teenager and I feel like I was maybe even seeking attention from him like I did with the other guys in the group. And when I say seeking attention, I mean that I was acting cute so that I was liked and got attention. Is that considered flirting? Was I flirting with him? Does this make me disgusting? That I liked the attention I got even though he was teenager? That I acted cute around him as well as all the other guys so that he would like me? I feel disgusted with myself. Does this make me a predator? Doesn’t this make me disgusting that I liked attention I got from a teenager? To be fair, I like the attention I get from any guy. I just like feeling liked. But I feel like it makes me disgusting that even though I knew he was a teenager I still liked and was flattered by the attention and was possibly even seeking it out from him. My head is all messed up. I really feel like I’m having an identity crisis. I feel disgusted with myself to the point that I’m nauseous. I’m so ashamed. I’ve been crying nonstop for days on end and I feel truly hopeless. I don’t know how I’m supposed to live my life with this shame and that I’m convinced that makes me a predator or a sick person. I don’t know if I’m overthinking things or not. I just really need some relief because I feel like I’m losing my mind, but I want someone to be honest with me about my actions.
Basically when I was drunk I was flirting with this guy I usual flirt with he was telling me that nothing could happen because he’s friends with my cousin, so I got really close to him and said oh resllr so you don’t want me, and I can’t remember what he said but I then kissed his like cheek or near his ear to like flirt with him and I’ve convinced myself because he said he couldn’t that basically I’ve harassed him. I left him alone after we’d finished talking but I’m so worried that me sorta going are you sure to him because he kept saying “maybe one day but right now I can’t” and saying “it’s not that I don’t want to” But I’m really scared that I’ve done something wrong. I keep picturing me kissing his cheek and him going like ugh fuck off when I don’t think that happened? I just have the worst anxiety around it right now
Huge tw I’m so scared I’m a r*pist people have told me I am. I wanted to lose my virginity when I was 19 I felt embarrassed and ashamed I hadn’t. I decided to get drunk and find someone in a club to lose it to. I don’t remember much other than I was happy it was finally happening and remember thinking my plan had worked. I was told by friends that the other person was drunk and possibly on drugs. I must be a r*pist as I knew what I was doing and instigated it, I took advantage and used someone. I feel sick and don’t deserve to move on I can’t even apologies as it was a complete stranger what if they’re living with trauma because of me.
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