- Date posted
- 1y
Meta OCD
Any thoughts on Meta OCD? Is that real?
Any thoughts on Meta OCD? Is that real?
Oh yeah totally real as in the thoughts exist and it’s a theme ‘Do I really have OcD’ ‘What if I’m doing the wrong treatment?’ ‘What if I missed a compulsion?’ ‘What if it comes back?’ ‘Why do I have OCD and not others?’ Etc, etc
It’s like you said. Do I really have OCD? Like I don’t really feel the need to do compulsions as much. (Which will probably change at some point)🤦♀️. But at the same time, IRL it’s not me at all. Like ism just going through the motions. No feelings at times. Idk. Hard to explain. 🤷♀️
Anyone ever experienced Meta OCD?
@Anonymous Yep! One of my main themes
@ListenToTheWind Like you’re completely numb to the thought. Whether you actually liked it or not.
@Anonymous Hmm, I don’t know if I understand the question. But I’m decidedly not numb to the thought all the time, that’s why it’s a theme. But it’s getting better.
@Anonymous Are you struggling with it now?
I have an obsession with doing bad prayers and it’s worse cause of meta ocd. I feel like I can psyche myself out into doing prayers I wouldn’t normally actually do. It’s not all just intrusive prayers either, but that is part of what Meta ocd is targeting. One issue, is that because of it, I’ll start praying for every little thing, like there to be enough soap, etc. I wouldn’t normally pray for this, but thanks to meta OCD I am and I still want it. This creates a bigger issue when there are other desires I have that I want but wouldn’t normally pray for. I can psyche myself out into possibly praying for those and meaning it, however this would not normally happen. Basically there is the fear of doing the prayer I know I could do. Then the fear of the fear of the prayer. Then the fear of the fear of the fear of the prayer, and it causes a lot of anxiety, and can lead to me actually doing it. I’m sure there can be confusion as to how much I mean things, but ocd will also hand select things I can mean (not just intrusive thoughts, since meta ocd is targeting things that aren’t intrusive thoughts). One way this goes away is if I allow myself to pray for all the bad things, even if I mean it. Because everything will go away, including praying for enough soap or something. But then I’m stuck on the fact that I prayed for the specific things. If I don’t do it, I’m stuck worrying about how my mind is going to manipulate me into praying for something
How do you know if it is OCD or just anxiety caused by inner conflict that needs to be resolved? Thoughts - discussions?
I suffer from religious ocd. My only goal in life is to live in God's will and to serve Him - to live and enjoy His eternal purposes & His presence. Jesus Christ is my life. That is my only desire on this earth, this short trip into eternity, and it's being stripped by ocd thoughts and intrusive thoughts 24-7. I have read many times that ocd can 'feel real', and this is true, our minds lie to us because of fear and anxiety we can't and were never meant to carry. I have begged and tormented myself in every way to find an answer from God. I think His answer may be that this is OCD, but I'm not sure. I started therapy again because I am so exhausted and this had stolen so much of my life in a spiral of negativity, depression, and constant anxiety & intrusive thoughts. I have spent about 2 years trying to figure out if my thoughts are real or not, especially with ocd it can deceive so easily as a spiritual matter when in reality it is just a thought, which is confusing and scary to say the least. Can anyone share their experiences with this sensation? No matter what the theme is... Thank you & Praying for your comfort
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