My mom wont let me go on medication, I don’t know what to do. I just want my mind to go quiet, everyone hates me and my boyfriend is also annoyed and made fun of my OCD. I just feel so alone
Girl if your man act like this just leave him. We are all here for you! I'd love to help you somehow, but i dont have any ideas how. You can vent anytime i'll listen to you :)
@Peanut._ Thanks girly🥺 This was the first time he made fun of my OCD, I started an argument which was my fault, but he made fun of a theme that I have and basically implied that I am crazy… I love him. Usually he has always been supportive and non judgmental, this was the first time, now I am scared that he has secretly been judging me the entire time :(
@Meowko Tell him if he cares he will research and learn about it. If not then leave him! You need someone who understands.
that's horrible that he said that to you!! so many people don't understand what we go through but your boyfriend should be the one to make you feel seen and not insane! that's incredibly dismissive. you don't deserve that and if i were you I'd be rethinking the relationship. as for your mom, I had to struggle with that a lot when I was a minor. what was helpful for me was walking her through what medical professionals recommended for treatment and all of the positives of medication on offical medical resource sites. if you have a therapist or psychiatrist, they can be a great person to help you have those conversations! they can listen to and reassure her fears a lot better than anyone else can, they do it every day
@zombye Thank you, I feel like I kind of deserved it, I thought he was lying to me and asked for reassurance, but I just always assume the worst. Thats when he made fun of my theme and subliminally called me crazy. I am a little sad though because I thought he would never judge me for my OCD. I do love him so much tho, he is the only one I have. I just talked to my mom about the medication, but she said I can do whatever I want but then said that they will make it worse and that I am gonna get addicted. She is not happy, I feel like everyone I love is just annoyed by me. I have no friends and my mom is upset and so is my boyfriend. I am sorry this is so much, thank you for your comment, I really appreciate you reading what I said
@Meowko that is absolutely not on you. he treated you like trash. it can suck when someone you love is dealing with OCD, but it's NEVER okay to say what he said to you. no matter how much you feel you "deserved" it. you deserve to be treated seriously and with respect. I'm glad your mother is letting you try medication. I'm sorry she's being so judgemental, but hopefully she'll turn around when she sees how much it's helping you. and no!! don't apologize. you're not too much. your feelings don't have to stay inside, they're allowed to take space! I'm so happy you're reaching out, it takes a lot of strength
Yes I completely get where you’re coming from, it took me a while to get through to my mum and still now I think she doesn’t fully understand it. Meds for me have been helpful and aren’t addictive at all. In combination with therapy it can really help! But you’re right, it does take a while, I’m still struggling and I’ve been on meds for a few years but it’s definitely a starting point!! I hope you start to feel better
@Flower152 Yes, I’m hoping that the meds with the combination of therapy will help me :( I just want to be normal for my boyfriend again and my mom also said I drag her down, I just want to be happy so I have lots of hope. Thank you for your comment :)
Girl I’m so sorry, no one should make you feel like you’re crazy, especially those close to you! You’re not crazy and you’re not alone. My mum was hesitant with meds at first too but it got to a point where I was so bad that meds were the only option of help. Have u spoke to her about the possibility of starting medication recently or is it definitely not an option? X
@Flower152 Thank you for your comment :) I did talk to her about it, but she thinks I am gonna depend on them and that I will get addicted, but I heard that prozac is not really addictive, it has been impacting my life so negatively, but she thinks I will get rid of OCD with Therapy, but I can’t just recover in a week, it will take months, and I don’t want to deal months with OCD symptoms :(( I think she doesn’t realize how hurtful OCD can be, she tries to understand, but she does not understand, I feel like only ppl WITH ocd can really understand my pain.
Please if someone can reply! I really just need someone to talk to. I don’t even know how to control my OCD. It honestly feels like it’s controlling me. Everyday my mind focuses on every bodily sensation I have and it’s like a broken record player, I have horrible health anxiety and my OCD just makes it worst just thinking about it everyday. It feels like everyone who I explain it to looks at me like I’m stupid/crazy. I use to be much more tame with my OCD, I use to eat things without worry, now I can’t even touch things I use to eat without worrying that I’ll get an allergic reaction (despite eating them BEFORE,,,but my mind tells me otherwise) and omg worrying about heart attacks, pulmonary issues..and I couldn’t even enjoy my own child’s birth because my mind was on high alert thinking I would hemorrhage any second or develop pre-E (complications of postpartum) I was miserable for the first couple of months of my baby’s life and I didn’t know what to do. And now, I’m pregnant with my second (4wks) and all the OCD thoughts and anxiety is coming back at me and I have no one to talk to, I feel lonely. And even if I considered taking a pill, I’d worry about being allergic to it and refusing to take it. I ruin everything for everyone. I remember I ate out one night and I started to think “you’re gonna pass out! You’re gonna pass out! (Without ever passing out before) and I had to leave! I feel like I ruin the mood for everyone when I don’t even try to, and I hate it.
Having ocd is so incredibly exhausting and depressing- my mom and dad argued with me for over an hour talking about how im a pain to be around, go in too many loops, and ruin everything and everyones mood… this conversation started with me saying im stressed out because of school and that i dont want to go because im exhausted- and idk if this is like ocd directly but it takes me like 2 hours to get ready in the morning because i need to look PERFECT and the same everyday literally 😭 and that process feels so exhausting every morning at 6am but i will NOT go to school without going through with it- i will literally be crying and shaking and wanting to go home the minute i get to school if even a single strand of my hair is not perfectly straightened or any blemishes or flaws are showing- and i cant even walk to school or anything bc im scared the humidity will mess with my hair and everything- and it just really affects my life? And yeah its freaking exhausting. And i have two more years of highschool and I dont know if im going to make it 😭i get super stressed over grades too because i need them to be extraordinary otherwise its a fail. Nothing below 95%. And thats also tiring! 😁 and my mom told me today “medication IS NOTTTT AND OPTION!!!” Like oh okay so im just cooked 😭 and therapy isnt really helping me at all- i feel like what im being told is so basic and generic and it doesn’t help me when im in a huge ocd episode- which is often… and what i hate most is like my mom says “don’t come to me with your problems after 6pm…” im sorry i cant schedule my feelings 😭 im so tired
(Long post warning) Hi, I’ve been struggling with severe OCD for six years now. it started in 2019 with my theme being getting sick/emetophobia. it devastated my life. I almost didn’t graduate high school from it. I remember washing my hands for three hours one day until they were nearly bloody while crying and asking why I could not stop doing it. I remember id have to write and rewrite sentences when I did my English homework and that’s why I nearly failed that class. I remember how I would spend up to thirty minutes to an hour pacing the halls of my apartment while my mom was asleep until I neutralized the thoughts about throwing up and I could finally go to bed. I don’t know when it happened, but my theme switched. Sometimes in late 2020 or early 2021, it switched to POCD. It started with a single thought, and I focused on it and it’s been my theme since then for four years. It has been absolutely destroying me. I feel so disgusted and lost and just tired. My compulsions are severe now. I thought they were bad before, but now they’re ten times worse. I can’t eat, drink, change my clothes, walk, or even do things on my phone normally. I’ve developed so many mental compulsions that it’s so intricate and complicated yet at the same time I’ve done them so much that they’ve become normal. An example I have is if im putting on a shirt and I have a “bad” thought, I have to take it off and put it back on two more times (that’ll make it 3 times I put the shirt back on - odd numbers are my safe number). I have to have a good thought on the third time otherwise I have to take it off and put it on two more times to make it five times I put on that shirt. If not that then I just put on a different shirt because the original is now tainted with my bad thought. I can’t open apps on my phone. It’s with the numbers again. If I open TikTok once while having a bad thought - I have to close it and open it two more times and so on. Sometimes I do it up to 30 times. So I just don’t do things usually. I don’t turn on the TV because I know I’ll redo it. I don’t open a book or grab it off my shelf because I’ll have to repeat the action. I can’t even lay in bed without getting up and redoing it even if im exhausted. I just feel so helpless. I don’t know what to do. I feel disgusting and even now my minds screaming at me that I am dirty and what I think is true. I just wish I was free of this, I wish I could just live my life. I’ve wasted hours and days because of my compulsions. I mask it so well around my friends. I don’t do them in front of anyone or I’ve learned to hide it well. But when im back home alone, it goes haywire. I just want to live again.
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