- Date posted
- 1y
- Date posted
- 1y
It's not incest after a certain set, if anything it's only a bit of a diverse feeling of distant relationships. I bet you didn't even know your husband before you dated, like as a friend or something similar.
- Date posted
- 1y
Hey, I know we are not supposed to give reassurance, but you really don’t have to worry about that. It’s not weird at all. Without OCD butting in, I wouldn’t think anything about sharing the same great great grandparents as my wife. I know OCD won’t let you off the hook though. OCD is probably making you feel like your first cousins or something. Try saying to yourself “maybe this is kind of weird” anytime the thoughts pop up. Don’t struggle.
- Date posted
- 1y
@Poppy7 I’m so sorry you feel like this. My guess is you really love your husband? This is ROCD. You probably think this is such a unique situation… OCD might even be convincing you it’s not OCD> “No this is serious!” It is OCD though. I promise. Non sufferers would laugh this off and jokingly say “yeah I married my cousin” and never think about it, but you have a brain disorder that won’t let you off the hook that easy, unfortunately. You can deal with this though… use maybe statements. Stand in front of the mirror and say whatever you fear> “maybe I pretty much married my cousin”, “maybe I’ll never get over these thoughts”, “maybe we’ll get divorced because of this”, “maybe people are judging us”, “maybe we can’t have healthy kids”. And then just sit in the anxiety or whatever it is you are feeling. Do not reassure yourself. You know this is ridiculous. Your husband’s response is the normal/appropriate response. But don’t even tell yourself that. Just say “maybe” to OCD and give it time. It sucks but you’ll feel better in time.
- Date posted
- 1y
Comment deleted by user
- Date posted
- 1y
@Poppy7 Yeah you recognize it’s OCD which is really good though. I have ROCD issues too. I love my wife more than anything. That’s why OCD targets her sometimes. There’s this weird silver lining with ROCD that proves beyond a shadow of a doubt how much you love your partner. Which is always good to remember. Just don’t use that fact as a compulsive response to your thoughts. You don’t need to go back and forth. Just say “okay OCD maybe you’re right, maybe this is weird”. We can all give you reassurances every day that it’s really not weird at all but OCD isn’t going to roll over so easy. You can’t struggle with it. Do you have a therapist? They can help you do ERP.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
Hey everyone, I’m going through something that really shook me up and triggered my OCD. Today I was talking to my mom about how people in our family have been talking badly about my cousin, who’s 17 and pregnant. I haven’t told my cousin anything about what they’re saying, because I don’t want to add any stress to her. I’ve honestly tried to protect her from all the drama. But then my mom told me to be careful about what I say to her, because she’s really worried my cousin could have a miscarriage from stress. She said if that happened and I had told my cousin anything, it would be my fault. I think my mom meant it out of concern, like she just wants to protect my cousin—but the way she said it came off as really harsh and it hurt me. Especially because I’ve never said anything to my cousin and I would never want to cause her any stress. Now my OCD is grabbing onto that fear. Even though I haven’t done anything wrong, it’s making me feel like, “What if something happens to the baby and it somehow ends up being your fault?” Logically, I know that doesn’t make sense. But the guilt and anxiety feel so real, and it’s hard to shake.
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 12w
I have severe sexual and relationship ocd and recently my loops have gotten worse in the past few months since being married. He’s the love of my life and my best friend, but these loops make me feel guilty and disgusted with myself. They range from coworkers to friends and sometimes his relatives. He knows about this and accepts and loves me, but some days I’m so tired of fighting the guilt.
- Date posted
- 12w
TW: death This is my first time posting, but I don’t know what to do. My husband who has never exhibited mental health symptoms before has been showing some OCD symptoms like ruminating (to the point where he can’t fall asleep for hours), asking for reassurance repeatedly, and overthinking in a way that it’s like he’s trying to solve problems by thinking about them a lot, but…they’re not actually real problems?? Far-fetched possibilities? We talk through his anxieties to what I think is resolution, just for him to bring it up again 30 min later. I’ve been in NOCD therapy for a month-ish now, and I’ve improved a lot—especially with the exact things my husband has begun to struggle with. I have not asked for reassurance in weeks. I feel like I infected him. I don’t know what to do because I don’t want to be his therapist or tell him what to do. He is in therapy for anxiety about starting a new job, but honestly, his therapist sucks, and he’s decided to find another one, hopefully, that is trained in ACT. I just feel guilty and helpless. Oh also to make it scarier, before I dated my husband, I was in a relationship with someone who had verrryyy severe OCD, to the point where my OCD seemed inconsequential. I was able to help him a lot, but being with him made my OCD worse because a lot of ocs were normalized. My precious parter ended up taking his own life. I’m just really on edge about this. I don’t want my husband to develop OCD and die.
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