- Date posted
- 5y ago
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 5y ago
You will totally beat this. But telling yourself you’re 100% straight , while it could be the truth , is not going to help you recover from this which I hate to say. You can only recover fully when you embrace uncertainty because you’ll always find something to latch onto and ruminate about
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I’m glad the test could help confirm this for you, but as with most reassurance, the good feelings you’re getting from it probably won’t last. Doubt and anxiety will eventually creep back in and you’ll go searching for more reassurance to make it go away again. Embrace the doubt and uncertainty and anxiety. Let it be there. And continue to live your life. You might be 100% straight. But maybe you’re 98% straight. Or 97%. Quantifying it won’t serve you in the long run. Being okay with not knowing that number will.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I understand what you’re saying, but if you really believed that with 100% certainty, you wouldn’t have HOCD. I’m assuming you’re still regularly experiencing doubts that make you spiral into rumination, anxiety, and compulsions. What I’m saying is that it’s your need for certainty (“always have been always will be 100% straight”) that’s driving the OCD. Can you live with the fact that there’s a teeny tiny chance you might be a little gay (even just 2 or 3%!) and stop trying to prove to yourself that you’re 100% straight? If you can learn to live with the possibility and the risk, you can overcome OCD. The intrusive thoughts won’t mean anything anymore because you’ve accepted their risk and they will therefore diminish over time.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I didn’t say you had to admit anything. Just to accept the slightest bit of uncertainty or risk into your life. I think you’re going to find it very difficult to overcome this without facing some uncertainty. Life is never and will never be 100% certain. Good luck to you.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I wish this OCD shit wasn't in the world.
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 5y ago
@Cc552 that’s the problem right there with all due respect. I’m not giving you reassurance. That’s why I said “ could be “. By telling yourself you are 100% straight , you’re taking a position and that’s the worst thing to do with OCD. It means you haven’t gotten under the fear and really want certainty. A few days of amazing relief is nowhere near as good as almost constant relief which you’ll get by accepting uncertainty.
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I totally understand your frustration. OCD is a monster , but the only way to slay it is to not let it have power over you. You simply can’t have 100% certainty and your OCD will always prey on the gaps you have in your memory , experience , or knowledge when it comes to your sexuality and history of it.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
It's not it could be the truth it is 100 % the truth. If OCD wasn't on earth I wouldn't even be talking about this bullshit. But unfortunately it is and with more time I will beat this. I got my anxiety down to s manageable level with time and this will be the same as it manifested from anxiety.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I always was and always will be straight. It's this OCD bullshit that plays games with your mind.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
No I will never admit to untrue rubbish. I will beat this HOCD bullshit.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Ocd nothing is sacred it attacks every possible thing so know that !
- Date posted
- 5y ago
A really bad panic attack lead to anxiety which lead to this bullshit.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
It'll take time to get rid of it just like the anxiety. My anxiety is not totally gone but way much better since just after I had the panic attack.
Related posts
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 13w ago
Looking back, I realize I’ve had OCD since I was 7. though I wasn’t diagnosed until I was 30. As a kid, I was consumed by fears I couldn’t explain: "What if God isn’t real? What happens when we die? How do I know I’m real?" These existential thoughts terrified me, and while everyone has them from time to time, I felt like they were consuming my life. By 12, I was having daily panic attacks about death and war, feeling untethered from reality as depersonalization and derealization set in. At 15, I turned to drinking, spending the next 15 years drunk, trying to escape my mind. I hated myself, struggled with my body, and my intrusive thoughts. Sobriety forced me to face it all head-on. In May 2022, I finally learned I had OCD. I remember the exact date: May 10th. Reading about it, I thought, "Oh my God, this is it. This explains everything." My main themes were existential OCD and self-harm intrusive thoughts. The self-harm fears were the hardest: "What if I kill myself? What if I lose control?" These thoughts terrified me because I didn’t want to die. ERP changed everything. At first, I thought, "You want me to confront my worst fears? Are you kidding me?" But ERP is gradual and done at your pace. My therapist taught me to lean into uncertainty instead of fighting it. She’d say, "Maybe you’ll kill yourself—who knows?" At first, it felt scary, but for OCD, it was freeing. Slowly, I realized my thoughts were just thoughts. ERP gave me my life back. I’m working again, I’m sober, and for the first time, I can imagine a future. If you’re scared to try ERP, I get it. But if you’re already living in fear, why not try a set of tools that can give you hope?
- Date posted
- 9w ago
Hello, I unknowingly have lived with ROCD or OCD (not sure what one. I’m new to this). It has ruined so many amazing romantic and platonic relationships and I am so sad that just now I am finding out what the hell is wrong with me. Maybe life would be different if I have known. My OCD and anxiety is at an all time high (ATH) due to some horrible events that have happened in the recent months. I am at the point where paranoia has taken over my life now. I had my first panic attack a few weeks ago where I fainted. My anxiety attacks are so extreme I go thought cognitive distortion that has lasted days. My girlfriend of 3 years is my emotional guardian and she no long has the energy to be that and honestly it’s not her responsibility to be that. She is bi and wanted to have an open relationship and for someone who has OCD this has not been good for me. She also was assaulted in my own home by a good friend of ours when I was out of town but it’s not a clear situation because it sounded consensual at first. I just left my very high paying job. I am financially secure but the job was emotionally abusive and looking back made my OCD worse. I am taking some time off to get my head right…but now, all I have to do during the day is live in my OCD. I’m very happy I finally figured out why I act the way I do but I don’t know if I can get better quick enough to save my relationship. I have never been so worried about myself (M 28 years old). I am a confident young professional and never thought I would be writing on a page like this. Anyway…I hope it gets better.
- Date posted
- 9w ago
Idk if this post is even worth it but it seemed like a normal day for me, called off work due to the weather so I get to just stay home and play games all day. Easy day besides dealing with the constant and unbearable battle with my intrusive thoughts/feelings. Took a shower and I just had constant thoughts, (heart palpitations are pretty constant) ended up breaking down and bawling my eyes out. I was diagnosed with HOCD and ROCD about 2 months ago and since it's just gotten worse. It feels as real as it can get and after talking to my girlfriend about the anxiety attack, it feels even more real. I have no desire or enjoyment from what comes from my brain, and at this point I'm on my knees begging the big man upstairs for my old life back, how do I go from being obsessed with women (sexually and emotionally) to pretty much doing a 180 overnight (with the obvious anxiety and worry behind it. No real desire obviously). I'm just at a loss, I've done a little ERP and it seemed to help with the brain fog but besides that, everything that it does to someone, I have. And again there's the doubt I even have OCD and I'm in straight denial. It just sucks.
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