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I have experienced every theme that can be added to post but I’m currently experiencing those. So I am on the spectrum and I happen to have a high sensory profile and it definitely gives the ocd more to latch unto. I would see a pretty female with makeup done and it eatssss and I would notice the facial symmetry + how her features compliment each other and my ocd would be like why did you notice she is pretty, BECAUSE I HAVE EYES😭! I can’t be the only neurodivergent person that notices details and how attractive people are intensely? I do not even care about orientation but I know for sure if I was into women, it won’t just start plaguing me one evening Im my head shouting “you are gay” like man Im a female at least say you are a lesbian 😭😂😂😂😂. How can I genuinely have no interest and get outrightly repulsed by females sexually and romantically. It feels like I am being forced to be something im not. I tried accepting i am lesbian but I experienced more anxiety and could not sleep till I accepted i am still straight and it is ocd playing with me(ocd leave me alone, I don’t even enjoy playing with you) I accepted i am a lesbian like ocd said I should but why do I still love my ex and hope I marry him😭 + I couldn’t bring myself to be interested in females. OCD leave me alone because I don’t enjoy this game again! I’m not homophobic at all but denouncing Im straight doesn’t feel like home and I still find myself yearning for only men

Themes constantly switching. I’ve been suffering with real event ocd the last year and am currently in therapy treating it. it’s nowhere near as bad as it was last year and it’s felt like a nice break. there’s days where it gets bad but i can’t compare it to the stress of last year. However i’ve noticed every time i overcome a theme a new one hits me out of nowhere. i’ve suffered with ocd since i was 9, and ive had multiple themes. i’m in a 2 year relationship with my partner and it’s amazing. she’s probably my second proper relationship due to the fact my first relationship gave me so much fear to get into another one as i was cheated on, and needed a few years to get over that. i kind of guessed that ROCD would creep in at some point as it just felt inevitable. anyways, i know my partner is not cheating on me, she’s beyond loyal, we are so so in love but i think due to that first relationship i had, being cheated on really messed with my head. it’s like my brain is telling me my partner has someone else even though i know in my heart nothings going on, and i trust her with my life. i also think because im in the happiest relationship of my life, anything that would indicate loosing her makes me feel sick and riddled with anxiety. and i know that’s completely normal for everyone. i think the most frustrating thing is, is knowing that my OCD has finally crept into my relationship which is something i never wanted it to do. this is a brand new theme and i have no idea how to treat this. i will speak to my therapist but if anyone has been through this theme and any advice in the meantime i would really appreciate it :).

does anyone else’s ocd take form about life’s big questions? i’ve noticed that doing a lot of work on my theme has greatly improved my quality of life and my overall mental health but as i move through the early years of my twenties and transition in adulthood and out of college-ive noticed a new theme. one that feel existential but hard to verbalize. it feels related to my old them of rocd but one that feels much more personal. i understand that this is a difficult transition for anyone, not just those with anxiety or ocd. however i think it’s helpful for me to just get it off of my chest and see if anyone can relate? i often dwell on the ideas like: -do i know myself? i don’t think i do all the ways so does that mean i shouldnt or can’t be in this relationship? it means that im not being true. -i wasted all my time in college on a relationship and its aftermaths that affected me for years to come. it prevented me from finding my friends. i used to be so happy and now i feel limited sometimes in friendships but its my own fault. because i keep everyone except my partner at an arms length. and if i cant let anyone else in except my partner, that’s bad and i should let them in or be in this relationship. -i struggle making friends and i think everyone is mad at me. -im missing out on life and its passing me by. everyone is out there improving and im working at a minimum wage job and becoming a starving artist. i dont know what i want and thats bad so i need to isolate myself. it’s clear that the stress of this transition has done a number on me thus past month. especially since i just moved and im 2 months post grad. but my ocd and anxiety is kicking in because this change, any advice?