Today and tonight I'm just feeling lost...like I'm not living a full life that I should be. That everyone else is living their best lives and here I am working on my OCD, hating my horrible job and just trying to male it thru the days...😥
Keep your chin up. Thats your ocd talking. It’s not always sunshine and rainbows but when it is it’s even better. We have greater appreciation for life.
Agreed with comment above. Hard to do in these moments, but give yourself some compassion for the work you are doing as if it was support for a good friend. Look around you and find something that makes you happy right now. You deserve it.
Thank you both. Some days I'm so happy with the progress I have made since starting treatment and then some days I get so depressed feeling...having a job that causes me constant stress isn't helping either.
It has been a hard night. I feel like my whole life I have been wanting people to like me and I’m doing that I lost myself. Especially with ocd and getting into a depression I lost interest in any and everything. For the past week it has kicked me back to that place. I feel boring, unoriginal, I fell like I don’t have anything special about me, if I ask someone they would say I’m nice. I’m over weight so I’ve never bough clothes I really like, I don’t have money to spend on things like art or decor. So I feel bland. I have never had a boyfriend and people look at me like I’m crazy. So basically people see me as an innocent person who has nothing special. I work, I go to school, and I’ve never been obsessed over a music artist or anything. So if people ask me my favorite band or movie I have no idea. I also fear that the moment that I do find myself that my ocd ideas will become real and they were just trapped Inside. Idk who I am. I just kept typing so it may not make sense.
I see people living their lives and just enjoying themselves. Not taking things too seriously and not overly stressing. And then there’s me. Who stresses at the slightest thing. Whose OCD has taken massive chunks of my life that I’ll never get back. It feels like I’m going through life just terrified of my own f*cking shadow… Any small thing I have to deal with that to anyone else might just cause slight inconvenience or nervousness, causes me to have an almost complete and utter breakdown. WHY CANT I HANDLE LIFE. I am so ashamed of who I am. I want to be someone who is brave and courageous and who does things and lives life anyway, regardless of fear. But no. I avoid living because of it. Why am I even here if this is how my life is? What is the point? I’m going through it today, friends 😭
How am I suppose to get better when OCD makes me doubt if I want to get better 😭. It feels like I just want to live in my OCD thoughts. It’s so scary!
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond
