Ric

Date posted: 1y

ROCD

I have ROCD. Right now I’m been in my head for a while. It has really kicked in now that we are going to talk to a lawyer about setting a will and trust up for us. I’m 60 years old. I am battling with the thoughts that do I really love my wife and should I leave. I picture myself trying to tell her and I break down into tears. I go back and forth with should I leave or go. In the past I used to look forward to seeing her come home from work or talk on the phone with her. Now at times I get triggered by it. At times I feel like running. Especially now. Does ROCD do this to you? Can it really make you think and feel that you don’t love your spouse?

Ric

Date posted: 1y

How can you be sure if it’s OCD or your true feelings. I’m at a loss.

Everhip119!

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

@Ric You’re asking for reassurance which makes OCD worse. It doesn’t matter if it’s real or not what matters is how you respond…ERP. You are distressed which means FEAR. OCD is the doubt disorder. Your trigger is her coming home and talking to her. Well guess what, you need to talk to her like nothing is wrong. Response prevention for this could be “I don’t have the answers right now” or “we may or may not be together forever, oh well.”

13rianna

Date posted: 1y

OCD in general attacks the things that mean the most to you. If your doubting the thought to leave than that sounds like OCD. It wants you to doubt yourself. Thoughts are just thoughts. They don’t have meaning until we attach meaning to them. Maybe you need to do something fun together, something you both enjoy. You may be having anxiety towards creating a will, too. Love isn’t just a feeling and emotion. When you love someone you also choose them every single day.

Ric

Date posted: 1y

@13rianna @13rianna we are going on vacation next month and I’m anxious about feeling depressed and anxious. It’s so much.

13rianna

Date posted: 1y

@Ric You are having thoughts about thoughts. Foreshadowing will only give you more anxiety. If you have the thought “what If I’m depressed on vacation” I’d answer it with “I’ll figure that out when the time comes”. Don’t let fear hold you back because that is telling your brain you are in danger.

Ric

Date posted: 1y

@13rianna okay. Thank you for your input. I appreciate it.

13rianna

Date posted: 1y

@Ric You got this! I’m 28 and in the best relationship I’ve ever had and my ocd tells me the complete opposite. Try to remember your values and how far you’ve already come!

Ric

Date posted: 1y

@13rianna @13rianna. What is the meaning of your values. I’m trying to get familiar with the words in treatment.

13rianna

Date posted: 1y

@Ric Your values are things that are important to you. It seems as though you value your wife and marriage. You value your mental health which is why you’re seeking help.

Misstama65

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

@13rianna Same... He's a great guy but rocd finds things and imagines things to worry about. It's exhausting

13rianna

Date posted: 1y

@Misstama65 We have to let go of trying to have control of things we cannot control. We have to accept uncertainty. Our OCD and anxiety is trying to keep us safe in situations that are not dangerous. Try to surrender to the OCD and respond with “thank you but I am safe. I do not have control over the uncertainty but I do have control over living in the moment”

Ric

Date posted: 1y

Excellent. Thank you. How do you navigate through the relationship especially if the ocd is telling you the opposite.

13rianna

Date posted: 1y

@Ric We cannot control the thoughts that pop up into our brain but we can control our values. We can control how we respond. As much as ocd tries to trick me I do my best to remember my values. I remind myself that my doubts are just ocd attacking what I love the most. I respond to my ocd saying “maybe I do maybe I don’t”. I try my best to not give my thoughts energy because once you give them energy that’s when our brains process them as good or bad thoughts.

Ric

Date posted: 1y

@13rianna thank you again for your help. Much appreciated.

faye1010

Date posted: 24w

ROCD

Good morning everyone, I need some opinions or help on what people might think is wrong. March 2024 is when I started questioning everything about my relationship for no reason he is everything that I wanted, but my mind is trying to tell me that it isn't April 2024 was probably one of the worst times of my life I stayed home from work because I was constantly crying and totally sick because I didn't know what to do. The thoughts slowly started to not bother me as much. I feel like since it ever started I never have gotten that. Love feeling back for my boyfriend, but I want it back so bad because when I did have it, it was absolutely amazing. I have no desire to kiss him or be intimate with him either which also scares me fast-forward to today. I am waking up with so many doubts in questioning myself. Is this ever gonna go away or am I ever gonna feel that love back for my boyfriend ever again? I feel like I'm wasting his time and my time because it feels never ending. I went to a therapist shortly after starting to deal with this and she didn't really seem to help so now on Wednesday I have a new therapist that specializes in OCD I think does anyone have any advice? Thank you so much in advance.

rjahastings

Date posted: 23w

ROCD - anxiety

I’m having what I think is my first ROCD full episode. I’ve had doubting thoughts the entirety of my relationship. But in the last couple of days have been overwhelmed with and debilitated by anxiety and the feeling that I need to break up with my boyfriend. I don’t know if I have OCD officially but talking to therapists it seems that it is likely and I’m going to an OCD specialist next week to talk through my feelings but I feel completely helpless and hopeless at the moment and riddled with anxiety. I’m in a long distance relationship. I seem to have a waves throughout the day when I want to communicate with my boyfriend and tell him I love him etc. but the other 80% of my day is filled with anxiety and dread that I’m going to have to break up with him. I just want the anxiety to go away and to know if my thoughts are real thoughts or OCD thoughts. My biggest fear is that this isn’t an OCD episode and I do need to break up with him. I’m seeing him this weekend and I’m filled with dread about feeling disconnected and anxious and not in love.

sley_13

Date posted: 23w

ROCD

I’ve been with my partner for almost a year now, and my rocd has become really really bad. I keep feeling like I fell out of love and I just have eyes for other people now, and that I would rather be with someone else. It feels like I’m infatuated with other people and it makes me so guilty. It’s been so hard for me because it’s hard to tell if it’s just my brain convincing me I don’t love my partner or if this is really my desire. The biggest fear I have is hurting my partner, so there’s also a sense of urgency that I need to tell them how I’ve been feeling to prevent myself from leading them on I guess. This is compounded with a history of porn addiction that still affects me and makes me feel like I’m more attracted to others. Has anyone else been in this position? I feel like I’m alone and that this is the sign that I’m terrible and shouldn’t be with my partner and that the end of our relationship is inevitable. I can’t tell if I really love them or not and if I really want to still be with them and I hate that I’m having that doubt.

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