help

Hi! I too have these thoughts and often stress about accidentally making my partner feel sexually violated even if that isn’t my intention. I completely get how distressing it is and how much it can ruin any moment between you two. One thing I’ve done with my partner is created a safe word used to indicate an immediate pause in whatever we are doing (arguing, being intimate, a conversation). This has helped not only put my mind at ease when I have these thoughts like this because I can remind myself that if my partner was in comfy in any way, they would have used the safe word. If comfortable, maybe u can also explain to your partner the importance of this safe word when you are not currently anxious about it. I told my partner I get very anxious about accidentally overstepping or making him uncomfortable in any way and this safe word allows me to know exactly when I am. And also when I’m not. I haven’t talked to my therapist about it yet as I am very new to ocd therapy so i’m not sure if this counts as a compulsion so I would ask your therapist or someone who knows a lot about this.