Exhausting

I recently went to my PCP for routine bloodwork, that I wanted, just to ease my mind and make sure there weren't any issues that needed attention. When they called with the results, I couldn't answer the phone. I felt an immediate sense of doom, my hands got tingley, and I just couldn't answer. It took 45 mins of crying, pacing around, and convincing myself that everything was going to be alright, to finally be able to call back. I had this done on my own, I requested this so I could try to stay on top of my health, I had NO real reason to be scared of any results.. My health anxiety seems to be different than the majority of fellow sufferers. Most people will run to the Dr for any and everything. I am the opposite. I don't want to know. I'm terrified. I've been this way since I was a kid.... I want to know that I'm healthy, but actually going to the appointments and having the tests that can tell me that...is like a nightmare for me. Does anyone else have this type of health anxiety? Has anyone found a way to ease the fear? My logical brain tells me that if there ever is something wrong, I'd want to know as soon as possible, so I could get treatment immediately. But my panicky, overthinking brain, is more powerful and won't let me do that in peace. It's exhausting wanting to be healthy and keep on top of things when you can't muster up the courage to go to the doctor like a normal adult. UGH

Username: Courage2ContinueCourage2Cont...

Date posted: 19w ago

I totally get this! It can take me forever to take myself to the doctors because I’m terrified of the results. “What if it comes back with bad results? What if it doesn’t and the symptoms are in my head? Would that mean I have a different issue? Does that make me a hypochondriac? What if I go in and waste their time? What if I don’t and end up dying? What if I end up getting diagnosed with something that doesn’t have a solution to the issue, and it would have been better not to know?” It’s exhausting! Not going to the doctors can be a form of avoidance, going to the doctors is a form of confession and reassurance seeking, googling is a form of self reassurance seeking and mental review, and the list goes on and on

Username: Chloe19Chloe19

Date posted: 19w ago

I also have health OCD, it manifests a bit different, but I am able to empathize. I struggle with body sensations and constantly thinking that I'm going to have a heart attack. Ive gone to the hospital a few times for that reason and they've given me EKGs, and it'll ease the worry but they eventually come back. I have voiced this concern to my primary and she wrote a script for me to wear a heart monitor over a year ago but still haven't done it. Part of the reason I didn't do it was because I couldn't afford it at the time, but there was also the fear that I might not like the results, so I've kept putting it off using that as a bit of an excuse. I have since gotten back on my anxiety medication which has helped decrease the amount of anxiety I have, and with that I find that I am able to better manage my OCD when faced with triggers. Another thing that I have found helpful lately when I spiral is to externalize my OCD through my art. I am a sculptor, so thinking about materials and forms that symbolize or represent my OCD I've found is a great way to metabolize it. Not sure if this helps or not, but I can empathize with your exhaustion. wishing you well<3

Username: sometimes_mary

Date posted: 4y ago

I have had anxiety issues for years and have been in therapy for that. But a big change in my life made it spin out of control. Btw, I am a bit of a control freak. So, for the last year, health anxiety has reigned. It all started when I had a panick attack and ran out of the operation room where I had to go under for a very simple, preventive procedure (I was convinced I wasn’t going to wake up.) I faced it again and made it. But after that I have been going from one health scare to the other. Skin cancer, oral cancer, breats cancer, HPV related cervical cancer - went through each recently. These are accompanied by panick attacks, insomnia and anxiously googling symptoms and testimonials. Every visit to the doctor end with panick that I forgot to check other important symptoms or that she might not be taking me seriously and miss something important. Now I am worried about a lymph node under my jaw that is slightly swollen. I know chances are it is ok and it is not cancer, it’s my anxiety. But what if it isn’t? And on it goes. I just want to stop worrying and go a day without googling symptoms or health issues. I am waiting for it to pass as these periods of health anxiety are kinda like panicks attacks - they build up, they peak and then they pass. I am afraid doctors will stop taking me seriously (this week I saw my doctor for a melanoma scare and a sore breast.) I am afraid when my doctor doesn’t investigate further and I am afraid when she does. I know it is absurd (I recently googled eye cancer) but I can’t stop. Sorry for the long post, I guess I wanted to write it all down and share it.

Username: LiBe

Date posted: 2y ago

Healthy anxiety

Does anyone have actual health concerns mixed with health ocd? It’s really hard having doctors say that i need to look into more labs and tests because they aren’t sure what’s going on with me and struggling with health ocd. Like how I’m so i find that balance to know what is a valid action to take vs anxious over reaction? I’m going on years of symptoms without clear answers and it’s driving me nuts. Any advice would be appreciated because my fears feel so valid when doctors show concern with no answers.

"Pure" OCD

Username: Themechanger

Date posted: 2y ago

Health OCD

Can someone tell me how to stop constantly googling every single thing that feels wrong. In the last three days I’ve convinced myself I had MS, I could be having a stroke (multiple times), I have a autoimmune disease and overall something’s wrong with my health. I made a appt to go see my doctor next week to get bloodwork done, which I know is almost like a compulsion because I need assurance that I’m okay, or if I’m not to figure out what’s wrong. My anxiety has made me have so many physical symptoms that I don’t know what’s a problem and what is my anxious brain. Every time something feels wrong I go to dr. Google and then I automatically have some life ending disease. My brain is so tired, I just can’t keep living like this where my mind races and greats new issues everyday. One week it’s health, the next it’s something else, the themes keep changing to keep it interesting and I fear that the mental/physical toll and stress of this is actually going to inevitably harm me. Can someone please give me some advice as to not lose my mind

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