Spiraling hard

I do this too, and it’s a bad problem. 1) don’t ruminate on the past, easier said than done but the key word you used was “younger” you’re older now, you’re wiser and you’re a different person. Even if it was a mistake like yesterday, it’s the past and you shouldn’t have to worry about that, what happened happened, I know the uncertainty is scary. I know, and we struggle with the same and you’re not alone for that. 2) give yourself some grace, you’re younger and you didn’t know at the time even if you thought you did, or should’ve known better? You didn’t, it still happened. Us as teens, young adults, children are bound to make the most mistakes even older adults, it happens and that’s okay. You’re okay. 3) you don’t have to tell her anything, from what I’ve seen ocd makes you have a guiltier conscience than before, and make you have the urge to confess unnecessary things, even stuff as young us. It’s a compulsion, that’ll only make you spiral and regret more, unfortunately we have to sit with the old us, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t move forward and accept it. You live and learn. We all struggle, stranger we all do and it’s okay.

We are human beings and we’ve all said and done things we aren’t proud of. You have to accept that this is just a part of being human. I have been through this same thing….many times. And what I remind myself is that if you’re feeling guilt, that’s an indication you’re a morally good person. Bad, evil people don’t feel remorse. Most people don’t spill their guts on the regular, they keep certain things to themselves. I have really struggled with this concept because in my mind - you HAVE to be an open book. But here’s the thing, you don’t. You share the parts of you that have shaped who you are today. Because the person you are today is the person she cares about. Everyone has a past. Let it live there.