- Date posted
- 47w
Can someone help me?! I’m fucking scared
Tw???! I started thinking about a time where I said that I wanted to or wondered of I would date a certain character that was a villian but he looked and acted like a kid and basically is a KID but I was so confused and scared but when I said that type of thing for whatever I said people like the fans said things like “Isn't that a child?!” or “that’s a child” and something like that. And now I feel like I'm a horrible person and even then I felt so ashamed and embarrassed that I actually said that or whatever I said. I deleted it and everything and I don't want to be seen that way I don't want to become like that but it still haunts me. I think I actually did want to date the character but I’m literally NOT physically attracted AT ALL to the character physically with his form or disguise if you want to know which character it’s pride from the anime fmab. I don’t know why it suddenly still scares me. Even though that’s not me. Like I know it made me sound like a creep or weirdo but I genuinely feel guilty and like I did something terrible!! But I didn’t I just basically shared a thought that I shouldn’t have shared. So I guess that’s why I also now feel like if I do or don’t have ocd. I mean I always feel disgusted and ashamed if I get intrusive thoughts like this and I do feel disgusted and ashamed it doesn’t matter if the kid is fictional or real I still feel disgusted and ashamed I want to throw up or trap myself in my attic or turn myself in just because of this now I can’t roleplay with a character like this or act I also do theatre so it’s been even hard for me too do anything because of this. I can’t even get to a psychiatrist and that’s why while I’m waiting to get into one I’m still dwelling on this😭 This scares me so fucking bad. Please help me.