Advice please!! needed

The theme i struggle with most is suicidal OCD. And with September being “national suicide awareness month”, My anxiety is sky high. i’m back in my spiral. I’m back with the panic attacks. My mind keeps comparing itself to all of these people and now i’m convinced i want too or i have these symptoms and im next. i’m freaking myself out and idk what to do. I get scared i have suicidal ideation when i know i don’t because i would never ever actually kms nor hurt myself in anyway. Does anyone know how to comercome this??? I just got out of my spiral not even 1 months ago and im scared im going deeper this time. My mind is all over the place scared im actually going to do it when i know im not and i feel like i have to go to the hospital or something idk what to do.

Username: imoka07imoka07

Date posted: 7w ago

i have this same thought that “oh since they were in such a bad mindset they killed themselves what if i get to that point” for me it helps to know that it’s a symptom of OCD and it’s not actually something i will do, it’s just something that worries you and you being worried about it is a good sign because that worry is keeping you from it at least that’s what mine does. i actually have a giant fear of death, so when i had that thought it scared me because i didn’t wanna kms. but your not alone, it will pass just remind yourself that you are in control not your mind!

Username: cows12465cows12465

Date posted: 7w ago

@imoka07 Thank you!! I’m extremely scared of dying or being killed so when i get these thoughts it makes me question everything.. i hate it lol

Username: imoka07imoka07

Date posted: 7w ago

@cows12465 of course and i hate it to.. especially at night it’s when i get the worst anxiety it feels so lonely, but we will be okay :)

Username: cows12465cows12465

Date posted: 7w ago

@imoka07 Do you get panic attacks with these thoughts aswell?

Username: imoka07imoka07

Date posted: 7w ago

@cows12465 i don’t know if i would really label it a panic attack from that thought more so just my chest feels really tight and it feels like i can’t breathe right. but everyone is different with there thoughts and how it affects them. at first it gave me really bad panic attacks but more so when the thought pops up i get anxiety symptoms and then i just try to breathe and remind myself that right now im safe, i don’t need to worry myself if my scary thought hasn’t happened. and that’s really all it is it’s just a scary thought. and because you had the thought doesn’t mean it will happen.. i recommend though that if you want tiktok or true crime to maybe cut down on it and watch something positive for me i watch people vs food, or just any silly video that will make me think of anything other then the scary thought.

Username: cows12465cows12465

Date posted: 7w ago

@imoka07 Yes i completely get it. I get the anxiety sometimes too when it’s not too bad. Other days it sends me into a straight panic attack to the point i’m shaking terribly and cannot breathe because i am so scared of these thoughts.

Username: Mac S. Mac S.

Date posted: 7w ago

i can definitely relate to this and the notion that you would never actually carry out these acts; however, they plague you. when i have moments where im having intense ideations i often times try to distract myself with youtube and something i actually need to pay attention to (not like death scrolling tiktok). i also try to be with friends if possible because it really does help to be in a room of loving people. everything will be okay despite how scary it all may seem now. wishing you luck ❤️

Username: cows12465cows12465

Date posted: 7w ago

@Mac S. Do you experience panic attacks with these thoughts?

Username: Mac S. Mac S.

Date posted: 7w ago

@cows12465 sometimes i do and then i try to address it as anxiety rather than OCD, like by doing guided breathing exercises and i also have a medication for quick relief with anxiety

Username: ListenToTheWindListenToTheWind

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 4w ago

How is it going? Seems like maybe there were some ups and downs previously - have you had some good days where you noticed you didn’t believe the thoughts? Were you able to avoid any compulsions? You mentioned you got out a month prior- amazing. Just keep going there are ups and downs until it starts to simmer down.

Username: holytropical!

Date posted: 5y ago

(PLEASE HELP IM BEGGING!) Hey guys, right now I’m having suicidal OCD and it’s really fucking scaring me because I know I want to live but it’s feeling like I’m going to end my life any second or any day now and that I’m going to die soon, and I’m afraid that I’m going to come up with a plan and go through with it, or say fuck it, I don’t care about recovery, be selfish and just do it. I’m SO scared I don’t know what to do anymore, I don’t know if these are real suicidal thoughts or just my OCD attacking me and I’m genuinely scared for my life. It’s like every second of the day I get a stupid intrusive suicidal thought and it makes me feel like I’m really suicidal and that I don’t want to live anymore, for ANYTHING positive I hear, I twist it and make it negative and tell myself, you’re going to die soon, or you’re gonna kill yourself anyway, you don’t have a future, you don’t care anymore. I even feel a lil bit down and sad when I get these thoughts and I start to feel depersonalization, I almost feel depressed when I get these thoughts all day and it makes me feel like I’m genuinely gonna get depressed and the suicidal thoughts will become REAL I’m so scared. Even when my parents tell me that I’m going to be ok and not do anything, I tell myself in my mind that I’m still going to go through with suicide and just kill myself. I don’t have a set plan and I’m afraid that I may develop a plan and want to go through with it. IM SCARED FOR MY LIFE! IM SO FUCKING SCARED PLEASE HELP PLEASE! Anyone that has gone through this PLEASE HELP! Going into a hospital won’t help because I’m not ACTUALLY suicidal but these thoughts make me FEEL like I am and it’s just SO confusing I don’t know what’s real and what’s not!!! PLEASE HELP ANYONE!!!! I’m so fucking scared ??

Harm OCD

Username: Anonymous 567

Date posted: 30w ago

Any advice?

So I’ve been in a pretty rough spiral/ocd spike for about a month now. I used to have this theme of being severely mentally ill or schizophrenic or psychotic and it went away for like 6 months and now it’s back full force. I have never hallucinated but I have this intense fear of what if I do. So with this theme I have these delusional thoughts that are just bizarre and I know how delusional they are but they feel so real and scary like I believe them. My body reacts by my stomach feeling uneasy and I’ll get a chill and just feel like I’m gonna be sick. Sometimes it doesn’t even have to be a thought per say.. it can just be a weird sensation or feeling and then I’ll become extremely anxious and borderline feel like I could panic. I can usually talk myself down from a full blown panic attack and but it’s just so distressing and I’m wondering if anyone else goes through this? I think it stems from a core fear of losing my family, ending up institutionalized away from my family and my family being devastated and judging me bc I “went crazy” please if anyone else can relate I’d appreciate any advice.

Username: Iamnotmythou...

Date posted: 13w ago

Need advice for Suicidal/Harm OCD obsessions

I am typing as I sit on the couch after a mental breakdown due to the frustration and fear I have with my Suicidal OCD intrusive thoughts. I know so much about why this is happening from therapy, research, and self help books that I feel like knowing this much about my condition is almost making it harder to recover. It’s like I feel like since I logically understand my problem, why can’t I change my response to it? I know logically that these thoughts are stuck in a loop because I have assigned meaning to them and am so scared of the concept of harming myself, yet ERP/CBT hasn’t yet helped much with my ability to tolerate the anxiety. I have moments where I feel good but the sense of impending doom and feeling like I “am bound to hurt myself” always comes back. At least for the last 2-3 months since this theme and OCD flare started. I don’t have any physical compulsions that me or my therapist have been able to identify except *maybe* researching too much. But other than that, my compulsions are all mental. However, I can’t pinpoint what exactly they are. It’s also important to note that I don’t avoid anything. I still use knives when I need to, I don’t hide them like others with this theme do. Yes they can trigger anxiety but I don’t actively avoid them or other items that trigger/have potential to harm me. When I do audio exposures (listening to my voice saying I am going to hurt myself), I hold a knife to my wrist to intensify the ERP, per my therapists request… and still the same or similar level of fear behind suicidal and harm OCD thoughts is there. Has anyone dealt with this and can help provide some insight as to what helped you? Anything is helpful here except negativity.

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Advice please!! needed

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