relation ocd 18+!

Hi this is the first time that i’m posting something on this and i’m very anxious because i am scared that i’ll say something wrong or something. So i have been diagnosed with ocd in 2022 i think? this year i’ll be going to a mental hospital for my ocd, ptsd, axiety and personality problems. The treatment will be a year in total. I came across this app and thought that it would be nice to talk to people who understand me, and to have a place where I can share the thoughts that make me feel embarrassed, without any judgement. I have been experiencing a lot of instrusive thoughts lately. I Have a girlfriend and she is the sweetest. But i keep having these thoughts like: she doesn’t find me attractive anymore, thats why we havent slept together this week. she never wants to have sex with me again. she wants to have sex with someone else. She misses her ex. she only cuddles with me to make me feel better and not because she wants to. I disgust her she thinks im disgusting because i have a higher sexdrive. I feel guilty and disgusting because so many thoughts are about sex and it makes me feel like a terrible person who only wants sex. Even though i know thats not true. I love her with my whole heart and that would stay that way even if she would never want sex again. idk does anyone have thoughts that are similar to mine and do you guys discuss this with your partner or not?

alisonjoy

Date posted: 44w

I completely understand and get this, too! Also, don't beat yourself up over a lot of the thoughts being sexual. Intrusive OCD thoughts tend to be either violent or sexual in nature because those are the thoughts that get under our skin the most and our brains know that and weaponize that against us. You are not alone. ❤️ I know I personally seek too much reassurance when I feel like this, but one healthier way to manage this is to try not to assume she feels that way unless she vocalizes this. By assuming what your girlfriend is thinking, you're "mind reading," as we call it in therapy, which is inherently unhealthy and tends to lead to spiraling and worsening intrusive thoughts. It's best to think of your stream of thoughts as a river and an intrusive thoughts as a log floating on by: you acknowledge it's presence, but try not to dwell on it, which is easier said than done, I know. It helps me to close my eyes and visualize an actual river and each thought being some sort of debris floating by until it is eventually out of sight. It's cheesy, but it can work if you're in the right mindset. The reason OCD thoughts bother us so much is because they stick to us instead of floating by and then we ruminate and dwell and escalate the problem. It takes time and practice, but you have to learn to accept that you have the thought and let float on by. Love, a therapist in training with OCD ❤️

trucerachel

Date posted: 44w

@alisonjoy thank you so much for replying and making me feel understood❤️

alisonjoy

Date posted: 44w

@trucerachel Of course! ☺️

Anonymous

Date posted: 44w

I have these thoughts to I tried discussing it cause everyone says to but I have pure ocd on top of rocd so the compulsion of asking didn't help the thoughts stop. And while they keep saying they understand she clearly didn't because she still does the triggers that I discussed and doesn't understood how painfull it feels. You should try to discuss it but sometimes there's just not a way to get someone who does have these thoughts like this to understand.

Anonymous

Date posted: 44w

And alot of the time there's nothing the other person can do to help because alot of the triggers are random or caused by things that have no correlation and is just life like not having sex in a bit and like you said them then doing something different feels forced or fake it's vest more to work on stopping the thought in your own way. In the hospital they can help you learn methods to do that.

anonymous737...

Date posted: 23w

someone pls answer!

I have ocd, i have crazy intrusive thoughts that make me super uncomfortable, the thing is i understand that ocd goes against your morals and try’s to make you feel like a bad person but how do i avoid pushing people away while trying to treat my ocd.. i love my boyfriend so so much but when i get intrusive thoughts about hurting his feelings or doing something terrible it scares me so bad that i’m scared to be around him because in my head it’s like “why am i even thinking of this if i love him so much” and i know i would never do anything to hurt him but i just feel terrible because he’s an amazing boyfriend and i have all these bad thoughts. :(

your strong

Date posted: 22w

Can you relate?

Hi this my first time ever hearing about this app n i downloaded it because lately my ocd been really bad and I feel I can’t have control over it it scares me because I sometimes hurt people around me when I don’t mean to for example my bf everytime something goes well my head just starts spinning in circles with bad thoughts n wanting to ruin stuff with him lowkey I messed up big times bc I let this time my thoughts win me over n took everything off on him without thinking n realizing how bad I had affected him it kills me because everytime I think im jus a weak person bc I always let everything get to me I’m jus so scared because now my head jus tells me your not good enough your gonna lose him this literally jus happens when something positive comes in my head or something good happens always jus wanna ruin it I hate it because I always believe my thoughts instead of him not because I don’t want to but because also of my past n trauma jus fucks it even more from the deep of my heart i believe him but my head reacts differently n lets it out n now am in the situation of knowing I can lose him any minute now even tho am putting my faith in god n trying my hardest to think positive n be better everyday I’m really trying but w ocd it’s so hard n jus get scared n let my thoughts get to me😞 idk what to do anymore

Canes12345!

Date posted: 21w

My life with ocd

I’m a good man and I know that. My OCD revolves around relationships. While dating someone a truly enjoy, I find myself needing to compulse everything on my mind or else I feel like I’m being a liar or keeping secrets. I also am pretty confident I suffer from false memory ocd. I don’t like to put a label on things but I’m 99.9% sure I do. My compulsions a lot of times come from things I’m not even sure are real. The more thought I put into them, the more I start to believe they are real. One of the worst compulsions I had in my relationship was I had a thought “what if I find my ex more attractive” and “what if I thought the sex with them was better”. I ended up compulsing these things to my gf. After lots of time to think and get a ahold of myself I was able to remind myself that these things weren’t true and I was just in a downward spiral. There was a 2-3 month period where every time I was relieved of something then I would instantly think of something else. These compulsions have caused insecurity in my gf and I feel like a terrible person. Never meant to hurt her at all and was just trying to find a sense of relief. While I know it is not true, I can’t fix things with words and I feel terrible. I would love to hear from people with tricks and strategies that can help. I love my gf and want to fix things and understand this is not a relationship fixer app but I would like to know what are some ways you are able to deal with these kind of things.

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relation ocd 18+!

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