- Username
- hateocd123
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Everything is very black and white in my head. If I didn't understand one problem on homework I couldn't do any other problem or turn it in. If I'm not completely straight then I'm gay. If I dislike one aspect of my boyfriend then he's not meant for me. There are no in betweens and I can't even accept that it's logically possible. If everything doesn't fit into a perfect box my brain freaks out.
For me what made things lighter and freshier was when i started validating my accomplishments and changing the way i talked to myself
Everyday doesnt matter how productive or unproductive it was i look at everything i did and feel glad that i did. Sometimes we get stuck in this constant interior nag that something is wrong, not good or perfect and the more we do that harder it gets to shut it, so dont be so harsh on yourself and on other would be my first guess, when you see yourself putting yourself down call your inner and healthier self to say a few good words on your benefit, after all your the best person to protect yourself from yourself
have a good day :)
Thank you! Those are good tips!
I am also very self-sabotaging and have a hard time trying new things, especially in front of others because I'm so afraid of mistakes and failure. Start small and let yourself bear through the discomfort.
Let's talk about self-sabotage today! There have been many times in my life when I would start an argument or pick a fight over the smallest of things. Looking back, I can now see that this was OCD. I think on some level, I was trying to put distance on the relationship. That way, if that person wasn't "the one," they weren't that committed, or my doubts were right, I wasn't going to be as hurt. It wasn't until I started really tackling the OCD that I realized this was completely self-sabotage. What about you? Are there certain pieces of your life that you can look back and say, yes - this was OCD in the form of self-sabotage?
Ok so my main theme is SOOCD and it eats me alive. When I was being bullied in school I became obsessed with talking to strangers on Omegle and began sexting people- including girls and idk if it’s because I thought it was wrong in my head or something which is why I enjoyed it? But immediately after I’d be like ew can’t believe I did that because I was just so horny for everything. I also watched lesbian porn too so this is something that I did for a couple of years since I was 16 but never something I wanted to do in real life. At the time I didn’t care it was some fun but I’m really traumatised by it ever since. I know I’m straight but my mind tells me because I did this online in the past there is no way I am straight. I feel so alone in the world I’ve been to therapy, had advice from several people but I just can’t listen to anyone because I know I’m the only one who has done that. I feel like it is sooooo hard to move past real events when you have OCD because people’s worst fear for me actually happened. So my OCD will forever convince me that I’m gay because of these events. I hate myself so much and always have- I don’t see a way past this and my life is slowly going downhill in every aspect because of it.
Or feel like if they allow themselves to recover from OCD then bad things will happen? Any answers or feedback will be greatly apprecaited So I ask this question as I have struggled really bad with OCD for almost 4 years now. So bad that I haven't worked in that time and I have spent all of my savings as I have had to live off it. I am 36 now and up until 4 years ago I had always worked and had a nice amount of money saved for a house deposit. The really frustrating thing is that I feel that I know exactly what it is I need to start doing in order to get a grip of my mental health and this horrific OCD but because I don't feel worthy of being happy and free of ocd and because I've told myself that if I do then something really bad will happen it stops me from allowing myself to get better. I've had over 150 hours of councelling in the past few years aswell as some ERP but because but because off these feelings I can't seem to get better
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