So lately I have been doing better. I’ve been generally happier and not having constant debilitating thoughts. But they’re STILL there. I’m trying not to let myself spiral but my brain is still putting these thoughts in my head and now I’m just like why??? I haven’t been anxious with them, I haven’t given them meaning so what is it then? Does it take a while to truly feel back to yourself?
The brain is a thought producing machine. It churns out thousands and thousands of thoughts every day. The ones you're consciously aware of are the ones you care about. In other words, the thoughts will continue to pop up as long as you care about them. Maybe they haven't made you anxious, and maybe you haven't given them "meaning" per se, but the very fact that you're posting this is a sign that you still care that they're there. You're frustrated with them, which is means there is still resistance. When you get to the point that you really don't care much about the thoughts, you simply won't notice them nearly as often. To get there, you need to deeply accept that the thoughts aren't the problem, the resistance to them is. And you're right, this can take a while. It's something that needs daily practice to really see results. Here's something you can try: throughout the day, try to be more aware of thoughts that AREN'T these intrusive ones. If the intrusive ones pop up, that's fine, just move along and keep looking for other ones. Do that for a bit and see if you discover anything. Maybe you will and maybe you won't. My guess is you'll realize just how many other thoughts there are besides the intrusive ones, making them seem smaller and smaller in the grand scheme of things.
There’s no set timeline for getting better or feeling back to yourself. You’ll notice the thoughts less over time, especially once they don’t matter as much. As a personal example, I used to have major anxiety with driving. I could not drive in the rain, at night, or long stretches of freeway. Tonight, I drove 40 minutes home in the rain, in the dark. My OCD wanted me to focus on feeling scared. The thought was there. But I didn’t engage and kept driving. Try not to focus on the fact that the thoughts are still present. Learn to not engage with them, to simply acknowledge them, and let them be. It is so wonderful that you’re doing better and that you’re happier. That is a major sign of progress. Hold on to that as proof that you are improving.
The prefrontal cortex in most people with OCD malfunctions because of the way it works in a more hyperactive and hyper aware way. Just think of it as “faster brain process.” This happens naturally. Too many thoughts makes it easier for more to get stuck. You know, the “sticky” thoughts that you just can’t shake, while others blow them off and can easily ignore them or even find them stupid. An OCD brain is constantly scanning for threats. Now that you know this, keep throwing the signal back that “this thought is not a threat.” Even when you do see it as a threat, your lack (or lessening) of response to it will eventually train your brain to stop throwing so many possible threats at you, because it’s really just trying to keep you safe. In a really wild, stubborn way. As long as you react, it will keep presenting the so-called threat, waiting for you to either grow bored with it, dismiss it, or accept it without a strong reaction. That’s when a game/theme gets old and disappears, and why a new one eventually pops up.
So I’ve noticed that my OCD has calmed down, I’m getting less intrusive thoughts but I feel more uncertain than ever. Is this normal for recovery?
Does anyone who has gotten better/healed with OCD ever experience that their thoughts and urges get more difficult as you get better. I feel like I am getting better at handling certain things but I feel like now newer themes and such get more difficult as I progress. I was curious if this is kind of the process to getting better. Weirdly, like it makes sense the closer you are to getting better thoughts become worst and stronger since you are doing better. Just need to keep on pushing and doing what I have been. Let me know, would love to hear your guys thoughts and feedback
My soocd sufferers and recoverers, I have a question! This is my second spiral and while I hade some manageable background noise before, the spiral literally “clicked” into place a few months again and it’s been awful every single day. I’m on meds and doing some light ERP/ACT because my anxiety was so bad I lost so much weight, but I wake up feeling ok and there’s no “click” back to normal. Is there supposed to be like a moment where it’s all over or is it gradual bc if anything I “feel gay” and more accepting of that. Anyone else?
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