These thought make me doubt my self so much it makes me think that the thoughts are real and it’s not my ocd I just want to be my old self I didn’t think about anything I can’t looks at the same gender because then my brain tells me I like them. But I just don’t want to lose my girlfriend I love her so much she’s the one who cures my ocd when am with her I don’t think about anything
I totally understand how you feel. When I'm with my boyfriend it's so easy to forget my fears but when I'm alone or not with him it's easier to spiral. Pls try to accept the thoughts. I know it's scary and that it seems counterintuitive but if you just say "you know what fine, maybe I'm gay" things will start to feel better. It takes that first leap of faith then overtime, the more you do it the better you will feel. Let go of trying to debate the thoughts or prove the thoughts wrong. You can do it
The thoughts gain power when you fight them. Let everything go.
i’m in the same boat. i keep convincing myself my thoughts are so real. it gives me so much anxiety. i hope you find some peace soon. you got this!! my bf knows about my thoughts and has told me that those thoughts don’t define me and they are not me. same goes for you!
But I feel like if I tell my self that I am gay I am just gonna stick with it but like man it’s so exhausting I haven’t been hanging out with my male friends for the same reason but hopefully it will go away I just want it to I just want to be normal again
I totally get this, truth is that u very much love ur gf and ur thoughts, even if they feel real, arent at all. Its scary and I get it . I too want to be my old self aswell but now we are on the same boat and what we can do is work through this. Its bad, you feel hopeless,alone, like ur thoughts are the truth...it triggers what u care the most about. Im sorry you feel the same way as I, we, do. Its awful but people healed from this and we can too!
Anyone else will just be doing anything normal and I’m gay comes in? It’s so distressing and I try and say ok sure ocd but the anxiety over takes me and my mind won’t let me believe I’m straight when I am. I love men I’m Not attracted to women but when I ask myself the doubt is for sure there which sounds like Casebook ocd. I’m just sick of this I don’t want to have to laugh at things in my head that don’t make any sense it’s so hard and unfair
Lately, I have been able to manage my OCD thoughts kind of. They’re still there but I kind of push them away? I know that pushing them away doesn’t help but it’s been my only way to survive. I get scared often about things like clothes or my voice or how I present myself. I get scared that I want to dress differently or act differently and it scares me. I know for a fact I don’t want boobs or anything like that, but my mind constantly is like “What if?” and it kills me. It has ruined everything for me. Sometimes I can’t even look in the mirror because I get scared that I won’t like what I see. I’ve also been afraid because I find myself relating to many female characters, or I want to act like them. Like Pearl from Steven Universe. I want to be graceful and elegant like her, but I don’t want to be a girl you know? My mind constantly pushes these thoughts of what if and images. Because I am not like most guys. Which I know is okay. It just freaks me out. It makes me question every aspect of my being. I know who I am, but I know that the only way to move forward is to accept that maybe I don’t.. It’s just a lot.
I have an amazing fiance, our anniversary is coming up soon and I'm very excited, but my head keeps going back and forth on I love him or actually you don't love him. You hate him. It's so distressing. I keep looking up things to save relationships and comparing our relationships to other people like what am I doing wrong? And anytime I think of it, I also start thinking what if all of this is just in my head and it's not real or I'm just faking all of this. It's constant back and forth and it's making things hard. I'm not texting him as much as I use to and he noticed it. He feels bad and I don't want him to think it's his fault. He's the best fiance I've ever had and I don't want to lose him, but I want these thoughts to go away. Is it even ROCD or am I just losing it? I know I have OCD around food and gross sexual intrusive thoughts but I don't know if it's effecting other aspects of my life (I was only recently diagnosed) Please help, anyone.
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