- Date posted
- 17w
My life feels impossible to continue
Everything is building up and I don’t see a way out.
Everything is building up and I don’t see a way out.
One day at a time 💕 it seems absolutely impossible like nothing is going to get better , thats how I felt in December, find someone to talk to I didnt want to speak to family or friends either, its REALLY hard to open up and talk to somone because our brains makes us think all kinda of things, feel things , lie to us, but please talk to someone find a therapist from NOCD or someone else, it truly does help , I wish you much needed peace💕
@LuGem0602 Thank you I will try
Hi J.E., I’m really sorry to hear that you’re feeling this way. I truly appreciate you sharing this with our community—it must have been difficult to do so. I know it can feel like everything is so hard and impossible at the moment, and I’ve been there myself. It might feel overwhelming, but please know that you're not alone, and there are people who care. Taking things one step at a time, even when it feels like it's too much, can sometimes be the smallest but most important change. Please remember I’m here if you ever want to talk or need anything.
@AnonymityK Yea people love me. Like I’m so blessed with the amount of things I have and friends and family. But I’m still so unhappy. Nobody knows this about me. I literally don’t know where to go from here. I wouldn’t kms but idk what else to do rn like this feels like hell and I just want to feel better
@J.E - Are you working with a therapist? I truly understand what you’re going through, I’ve been there myself. Whatever the reason is for not sharing with friends or family, it’s completely valid. But I wanted to share that, for me, when I finally opened up to my partner and family, that’s when I started to feel like I wasn’t alone. I was so afraid they wouldn’t understand or that I’d be judged, and honestly, they didn’t fully understand what I was experiencing. But even so, they were still there for me, and that support gave me the courage to keep pushing through. It’s not easy, but reaching out for help really can make a difference. If you’re not working with a therapist, perhaps starting there would be a good step.
@AnonymityK I’m not working with one because I’m only 16
Somethings that help me have been spending more time with people who build up my energy and feel like home, like my family. Also, doing my homework, it sounds silly but it gets my mind directed on something else that needs to be done anyway, same thing with chores. Find little things to make life worth living that aren’t the compulsions your brain is telling you you have to do
@cmax20 Thanks. When I’m around people I feel even more lonely and I literally have like some kind of social anxiety or something around even my family and friends. And I do school from home and it’s incredibly hard to do. My school causes me a lot of anxiety and a lot of times I’ll literally break down in my house for like a strait hour when I’m home alone. I’ve punched a hole in my wall before. I don’t even understand who I’ve become. None of this sounds like me I’m disappointed and disgusted with myself even writing this. Like at this point I’m literally begging for help. But then at the same time I would never tell my family or friends any of this because they just won’t understand how bad it really is so I just don’t. I feel so alone in this and idk what to do.
@J.E You’re not alone, even though it feels like it. A lot of this stuff, I have found, is a lot easier said than done. I’ve delt with OCD since I was 7 and I’m 19 now, it gets better but sadly never really goes away. However, thinking or doing hobbies or watching shows you like, or maybe even finding a somewhat happy place could help! Being here and asking for help is putting you in the path to feel better about yourself and your overall quality of life
@cmax20 That’s my biggest problem my ocd questions if I even love my hobbies or anything or anyone. I literally am so scared of what my future is going to look like and I feel like I’m wasting the best years of my life because of my own thoughts. Idk what to do rn
Hi J.E., I wish I could give you a big hug right now, but I guess a virtual hug will have to do. OCD is a bitch. Please know that it will take a lot of time (I’ve been in therapy and doing ERP for a year now), it’s a marathon but you take it in baby steps. You are loved and your life has meaning. Please know that OCD does not define you, and you can have, and are deserving of, the future you want. If you can’t find a therapist on NOCD, you may be able to find a regular therapist who has experience with and knows a lot about OCD. That’s what I did before I discovered NOCD. Please know you are not alone, and you have support here. I’m sending lots of hugs and support your way.
This is the very reason why therapy exists - there are people who can help you to look at things from a different perspective. If you need immediate assistance, please call 911 or 988 or go to your nearest emergency room. Those resources can be there for you to get you the help that you need. I hope that you will take advantage of them.
I’ve been going through this rough patch for the last four months, and I can already feel an even worse one coming. I just feel scared. And on top of that, I’m going to stop therapy. After everything with my current therapist, I just don’t have the strength to keep trying anymore. I feel hopeless. My head hurts so much, and it’s hard to keep going when everything feels this bad. I just want to cry, hope this feeling passes, and maybe try again if it ever lets up. But right now, it feels like nothing will ever get better. I don’t feel like I can ask for help. I hate that it took me so long to realize this wasn’t the therapist for me. I was too scared of being dramatic, so I let it go on for far too long, and now I feel like I’ve just become a burden-like. I hate that I let it get to that point, especially when I was paying for this. I just want to give up. I feel broken down, and I don’t even want to be okay anymore.
I don’t know if it’s worth it to keep going. I have so many diagnoses, so little support, and constant struggles with finding the right medication. My immune system is weak, I have multiple deficiencies, and I’m dealing with so many physical health problems on top of severe OCD. It’s just too much. On top of everything, my family treats me so not okay. Every single day is a fight just to keep going—to wake up, to eat, to take care of myself even a little. I’ve lost over ten pounds in the last two weeks from how depressed I’ve been. And instead of support, all I get is blame. My family constantly throws my struggles in my face, calling me selfish, as if I’m choosing this. I am trying so hard to push past all of this. But after five long months of severe OCD, anxiety, depression, panic disorder, and everything else making life unbearable, I am exhausted. And to be called lazy? Selfish? *Worthless*? How am I supposed to keep going when the people around me refuse to see how hard I’m trying? I don’t want this anymore. None of this suffering feels worth it. What am I fighting for just to be treated this way by my own family? To be yelled at for the look on my face, when my face reflects nothing but the stress, panic, and despair I’m drowning in? Am I still supposed to smile for them? This isn’t fair. No one should have to live like this. I don’t deserve to be treated this way, I’m really trying to keep going, but I just want everything to end.
i think i gave up, every time i try to calm down, practice self-compassion or accept uncertainty something worse happens that seems to confirm my event. it feels too, too real even now, it's getting worse with each passing day. i'm really scared, it's hard for me to enjoy the few good moments i have with everyone because now i'm convinced that i'm a horrible person, i know everyone will hate me when they find out, i feel like i'm lying to them. i'll lose everything. i feel like my life is genuinely ending, i'll lose all the good things i worked hard for.
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