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It sounds like you're going through an incredibly challenging time, and it's brave of you to share your experiences. Living with OCD, especially when it brings such intense feelings of guilt and shame, is exhausting. It's also disheartening when you feel your treatment isn't addressing your core needs. Please know that specialized treatments like ERP are recognized for their effectiveness with OCD. If you’d like additional support, feel free to book a free call with our NOCD team. We’d be happy to share more information and explore ways to help. No one has to live in fear of their own thoughts. Also here are some helpful resources: https://www.treatmyocd.com/what-is-ocd/common-fears/why-am-i-always-repeating-words-in-my-head-advice-from-a-therapist https://www.treatmyocd.com/what-is-ocd/common-fears/are-ocd-and-bpd-related-heres-what-experts-say https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/my-journey-to-becoming-an-ocd-specialist-began-in-my-adolescence/

I’m so sorry to hear :( Yes it’s not surprising that you’re still stuck in that Ocd loop as talk therapy isn’t helpful for Ocd. It’s helpful for OTHER anxiety disorders such as GAD, but Ocd has to be treated veryyyy very differently. Talk therapy involves a lot of compulsions like rumination, confessing, challenging thoughts, and reassurance seeking. The reassurance compulsion might also contribute to why you are relying on your therapist so much, but it’s also normal that therapy “breakups” are hard in general! ERP is the gold standard treatment for Ocd 🔑 I’m sorry about the psychiatrist laughing at you for mentioning ERP. He doesn’t know what he’s doing if he doesn’t see ERP as a valid treatment and he shouldn’t be treated Ocd sufferers. Ocd is highly misunderstood in the medical community and even lots of professionals are sadly uneducated on it

I'm sorry to write this, and I certainly don't know your condition, but general therapists are usually clueless on how to treat OCD. The most they've learned about the disorder is what they've read about it in some textbook. I speak from experience. Wasted a lot of time and money with general therapists who had no idea what do about it. OCD is a peculiar disorder and doesn't respond well to general therapy. I began to recover after I found NOCD and was assigned a trained OCD therapist who uses ERP therapy. She knew precisely what I was going through and how to treat it. I'm in a much better place now than I was before NOCD. I recommend you contact NOCD for a free consultation. OCD is treatable, and my NOCD therapist helped to change my life. Hope this helps.