- Date posted
- 5w
i’m scared i’m. horrible person
i’ve done so many horrible things and i’m just so scared that i don’t deserve anything good in life
i’ve done so many horrible things and i’m just so scared that i don’t deserve anything good in life
This is my biggest concern nowadays too. I would suggest just trying to be okay with the uncertainty of knowing whether or not you're a good person. Maybe you are, maybe you aren't. Trust me, I know this is very hard. It's the whole reason I'm back and have scheduled a session.
You're not alone in this :( I worry about things that happened 10+ years ago lol. We can't go back and change anything, but we're in control of our present. Maybe we're the worst person on planet Earth, maybe we're not, but in this moment, I'm going to choose to believe that we are capable and deserving of good things! 🤍 Which, you are! You deserve love, happiness, compassion, and everything else good in the world! Don't let OCD convince you otherwise. Acknowledge the intrusive thoughts, but don't engage with them. It'll pass, eventually, and until then? Offer yourself the same compassion you would offer to others.
Same :(
this has been my biggest theme lately. i can’t stop thinking about regrets and mistakes and they take up all my time and energy. it’s so hard to enjoy things when i feel like im not worthy of enjoying anything. but im slowly recognizing that every single person has regrets and mistakes. just with people like us it is so much harder to accept that for ourselves. we all grow and learn and im sure you are a wonderful person :)
i have done so many bad things bc of my OCD. and the thing is i have actually done them. whether or not they were compulsions doesn’t matter bc i still did those things with a fully conscious mind and I cannot erase those moments. and today I did something completely irredeemable. I don’t know how I can live with myself bc I know I am not worthy of life anymore. I am not worthy of being able to walk around free when I am a danger. and people will say “no it’s just your thoughts telling u this” NO IT ISNT. I HAVE ACTUALLY DONE BAD THINGS THAT ARE IMMORAL AND AT THIS POINT CALLING THEM COMPULSIONS JUST FEELS WRONG. I wish I had normal ocd. bc I know I deserve to suffer bc of all these things so im fine with it being normal OCD. there is nothing no one can do for me anymore. I doubt anyone will see this post anyway. and if u have read this far, ur better off just scrolling away bc im just a terrible person who is better off d3@d.
I look back at various past events in my life where I said or did things that I feel really guilty, disgusted, and ashamed about. I replay them in my head for hours. I feel anxious about crossing paths with people that I've hurt or upset in the past or who perceive me badly, to the point that I will avoid going out in public as much as possible. I go out for work, errands, appointments, and occasionally to eat (even though those all give me a lot of anxiety), but I avoid community events where people might recognize me and I tend to isolate myself. The only people I see regularly are my boyfriend, my parents, and my coworkers. I live in a small community and I'm worried about people confronting me publicly and proving what a bad person I must be.
I feel like a horrible person who doesn’t deserve to live. So even when I start feeling better I feel like I don’t deserve that. I just feel like a bad person who doesn’t care about anyone
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond