I feel like I did something bad like I was in a huanted house and this girl wanted me to hold her hand and we were holding hands and she went to put my hands beside her boob and I’m just like omg this is wrong because she’s younger than me and I think she’s a minor So now I think I’m a criminal even though my intention was not evil
The person who gives you advice might sound harsh sometimes, but I understand — I can’t even go to university because I’m afraid of being a pervert. Maybe I’ll cry, but it’s hard, and I really feel what you’re going through. The good step is therapy. Everyone keeps telling me to go to university, but no one sees what’s inside me.
@Anonymous University? Buddy, they’re all adults. Well, I’m 18 so maybe I don’t really understand.
@SAGUI The story isn’t like that. I’m just afraid that I might act inappropriately at university. I’m still trying to get treatment, and I don’t even know what major I want yet. And by “inappropriate,” I don’t mean towards children — my fear is towards adults.
@SAGUI I feel like I’m not ready to go to university. I’m not healed enough yet, and studying will only put more pressure on me.
If you took your hand away then you’re not a groomer. If your hand stayed there more in shock but moved it away because you realized what was happening, then you’re not a groomer.
@SAGUI I let that happen omg
@Idontknow You moved it away when you realized what was happening? You’re not a groomer.
@SAGUI I think I did because all I was focused on was the haunted house
@SAGUI Ok I asked her age and she’s 18 thank god
@Idontknow Oh, well. That’s a relief. And she moved your hand towards your chest? Yeah, you’re good. Just saying I think that’s assault. I’m not going to say, “If anything she assaulted you” because that’s victimizing even though you kind of are getting assaulted. Maybe not assault maybe more coercion? But talk to her about it. Wow. I’m so sorry that happened to you.
@SAGUI It’s assault? Then I think I did something bad because it was my hands that touched the side and she put my hand there I’m kinda creeped out I was sleeping and I woke up and saw her staring at me
@Idontknow No, like, she assaulted you. You may have put your hand there just because you were so focused on putting your hand there. It doesn’t mean anything. And even if she’s 18 so it’s not the same as touching kids. And she put YOUR hand there. You didn’t like it. Are you gay? If you’re not then why are you worrying so much.
@SAGUI I didn’t even put my hand there I would worry if she was a minor image if she was I would literally cry maybe she’s lying about being 18
@Idontknow Dude, take a deep breath. Do some box breathing. It is not your fault.
Then don’t imagine your life being controlled by this anxiety. I just see what you write, and honestly, I’m tired of you because you don’t take what I say seriously. People aren’t accused of anything because of your small movements—this is just OCD. We always have situations, but not everything is harassment, nor does it mean you have inappropriate feelings toward children. You know, yesterday at the dentist, there was a woman who put her hand on my shoulder and asked me something, but I didn’t care and didn’t interpret it as harassment. Not every movement means that. I hope you understand.
@Anonymous I didn’t feel comfortable talking to you because I feel like a terrible person and a p I’m going to get therapy around November and I can’t hold every action in You’re taking it personally I told you I have issues
@Anonymous You came in my comments to say you’re tired of me like I haven’t heard that one before
@Idontknow I’m not taking it personally. I understand what you’re going through. I used to be scared to talk to people too, and I ended up losing everyone. I don’t want you to go through that. I want you to be brave — you can do it. Believe me, I used to be afraid that I might steal someone’s partner too. I was struggling just like you, but I don’t want you to realize this too late and regret it.
@Idontknow It’s not about you personally, but about the fact that you don’t take my advice seriously. I thought you were neglecting your treatment. I know my advice sounds harsh, but it’s the truth. I just wished someone had told me this before, but no one helped me.
@Idontknow Ok, no one is ever going to give you their birth certificate or passport to prove to you they’re 18. You just have to trust them. You’re not a terrible person you just do bad things because you worry about being a bad person. It’s ironic really.
@SAGUI Yeah seems sus but I don’t want to be a p because what if they’re lying im the one who is going to end up behind bars
@Anonymous I have nobody either way and my life sucks
@Idontknow Dude, the only way you’re gonna end up behind bars is if they told you they weren’t 18 and you kept talking to them and even then you were talking to them sexually before or after.
The thing is, your reassurance cycle keeps getting smaller. For example, I told you more than once that I’m 18, but you still didn’t believe me and blocked me. Then I told you again, yet you still didn’t feel any relief. Don’t you see that your reassurance circle keeps shrinking? I’m only trying to help you, but you’re making things harder and saying you’ll block me. You can block me if you want — I already know you probably will, and that’s okay. Even though I truly want to help you, I’m getting tired of telling you to try exposure therapy. You just don’t want to believe it.
@Anonymous Because for me to believe I need to see passport or birth certificate
@Idontknow And you can’t ask for all of that—it would really seem weird 🤦♀️
@Anonymous Yeah it is sus but I don’t want to be a pred
when I was 15 soon to turn 16, I met this girl in a IG group chat made by our mutual friends. We started talking and eventually we started flirting and talking sexual towards each other, though eventually we stopped talking because she was being really weird. A couple months later In July of 2024 my friend found out that she was actually 13 and that she lied to me about her age. It's been 10 months since l've found out and I still feel so disgusted in myself. I had my suspicions at the time but I let them go since she said she was 16 turning 17. I was completely oblivious trusting someone I only knew online especially since i've never seen their face either. i'm struggling on what to do since i've been suffering with POCD since I was 15. Till this day I still feel weird and disgusted in myself because of that. But it feels ironic since i'm sexualizing someone that's 2 years younger than me and I waited to confirm she was around my age range to sexualize her. I feel so weird and guilty about it idk what to do
I feel like I did something bad now because I went to put the blanket on my brother and my hand was close to his back I had a thought before like “it’s time to touch him” and I stood up and he was on a call but he was sleeping so now I’m like why did I stood up? Was it to take the iPad or what exactly? I feel like a child molester I don’t remember touching his area or butt because I didn’t but I had my hand near his back I asked my brother if I did anything he said no I asked if I did anything when I put the blanket over him he said he was sleeping so that doesn’t reassure me So I almost acted on it?
help. it all happened too very fast. i was having a random b*ner, and i wanted to stop it by forcing an er*ction so it would go down afterwards, i had also seen a yt short of cyberpunk 2077 phantom liberty, in which a beautiful redheaded character appears, and i had random thought abt how maybe she wouldn't be truly that pretty and it was just make up. i imagined a scenario in which i had an okay looking girlfriend but that would look very hot with make up on, and i thought that was the perfect scenario to release the b*ner by momentarily forcing an erection and as i did that i remembered a highschool crush i had of a girl older than me that i found very beautiful and i distinctly remember being excited to see her with make up on, and this memory associated immediately. it went like this -> imagine girlfriend that is beautiful with make up on as i prepare to have an er*ction -> this reminds me just like that time in highschool -> the positive memory of my crush appears as i force an er*ction to happen at the same time without thinking too much (this all happens in a span of a millisec) i don't know how but my brain didn't register that memory as a threat, i had forgotten the context, it didn't even cross my mind that it happened years ago in highschool, i just had this memory. now im worried that i committed a horrible disgusting act. the erection wasn't caused by the memory of the crush, i planned it to happen with a safe image and that image of the crush appeared as i remembered and it didn't register it as a threat and this just happened; because i don't believe i was aroused by the memory, i was just remember that she was pretty. i don't know if it was just coincidence. it wasn't intentional, but now im disgusted at myself. there are 3 possibilities: 1. i already had made the conscious decision to force an erection from the scenario before and as the memory appeared, as it all happened in a millisecond, i didn't have enough time to process it with its due context and i didnt perceive that memory as triggering or something inappropriate and for my brain it was okay to be in the background while the er*ction happened. 2. it happened in one second, the conscious decision was already made from the scenario before so the er*ction randomly happened during the remembrance 3. worst case: in the moment of the er*ction as i remembered the crush i put myself in those shoes of the young me and as the memory happened very fast i forgot the context and the distance of the period frame in which had happened (long ago) and since i remembered her being older than me i still perceived in that fragment of the memory that way, and since i was in the memory itself i found her attractive normally, indistinguishably and separated from the present time, and for that split second i perceived her normally as if i was attracted to a girl in my present time, it literally felt a "normal" perception of a girl i liked and i didn't realise it wasn't the case; and my mind since it lacked the necessary context it allowed it to be non dangerous and not wrong to force an erection, and i realised it was a mistake only after it happened hence the panic... so it all happened before processing the context of the time in which had happen that would result as inappropriate. im afraid that the 3. is what happened and that it is unacceptable.
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