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@xyzwqr Yeah understandable, but were you referring to self forgiveness or forgiveness of others? If the situation doesnt even apply to you, its not for you to forgive anyway, you've taken on a burden that isn't yours.

@xyzwqr I'm struggling to follow this conversation, sorry

@xyzwqr I think this all the time, like before this app when I would be on Reddit for hours compulsively looking for situations similar to mine I would often think about what exactly everyones real events were. I know ocd is ocd regardless of whether or not what you did was bad, but it would cause me to spiral and still does sometimes. When I think about what the line is when it comes to forgiveness my ocd will tell me that I’ve crossed that line especially because my real event was sexually themed involving a taboo topic and happened anywhere btwn the ages of 17-19 (I’m not to sure of the exact age because it happened a while ago and the memory isn’t all that clear). Sometimes when I’m more logical, I’ll tell myself my ocd is blowing things out of proportion because I didn’t harm anyone or involve anyone real and would never even consider it. My ocd will also often tell me that I’m gaslighting myself and will compare me to a sexual predator and I’ll end up doing mental gymnastics where my brain will say things like “pedophiles tell themselves the same thing to delude themselves into thinking they’re not evil.”

@xyzwqr Also sorry for the whole essay of responses that I’m giving you, but when my brain first attached onto my real event, I genuinely felt the worst that I’ve ever felt in my life, like literally worse then any physical pain that I’ve ever had because it was my first time experiencing real event ocd and everything was was still so fresh. I compulsively confessed to someone on the real event OCD subreddit and they did reassure me that they didn’t think that what I did was as bad as I was making it but later on during another spiral I went back to check our conversation and read it over for reassurance and ended up looking through the users other reply’s and stuff that they Interacted with. I found out they were on the opposite spectrum of my political beliefs which maybe wouldn’t have triggered me so badly but they were using very aggressive, ignorant and awful rhetoric surrounding certain political topics which just made me feel so icky. This caused me to spiral really badly since any reassurance that they gave me was tainted in a sense because my brain was like if this persons interactions on this platform are like this, it basically negates everything that they told me.

@xyzwqr Whatever you did you deserve to forgive yourself for being imperfect, I also struggle with this so that advice is also for me.

@xyzwqr Do you judge others the same way?