Here if anyone needs help!

Yeah I know I just can’t shake this thought tho. But you can validate what my friend told me as you work in a school?

Why do you say nothing would happen because my mind jumps to the worse case scenario

Okay great thank you for the tips and for the insight! My ocd makes me think the worse case scenario would happen

Yeah, I get no joy or pleasure out of thoughts and almost threw up once but ocd still says I like it

This is typical ocd. The feelings and thoughts are all hallmarks of ocd. This is another way to get you to believe it. Don't buy into it. You need to remind yourself it's ocd each time and focus on something else. Try to focus on something else for a period of time and if you need to ruminate put a timer on and after it goes off then you can't ruminate after that. Keep yourse accountable.

@Crawfish What do you mean by feelings? Like false feelings? What do you mean by it feels like you like it? Can you plz explain it to me I feel like vomiting this is so real and I don't know what to do anymore.

@LinaD10 So your mind is super powerful and at times when we are so wrapped up in these ocd themes it can give us what feels like we want it or the feelings that we may like it. But this is what ocd does to try to get us to use this as evidence to prove it. But we have to remember this is ocd. Just like when we have a cold, we have snot, sneezing, coughing etc. These are all symptoms of a cold and so are the things you're going through its symptoms of ocd.

@LinaD10 So when we step back and start doing the recovery steos these symptoms die down and they no longer come up.

@Crawfish I appreciate you commenting. I can't get into therapy until the new year cause that is when my insurance is finalized. I've been hanging on by a thread lately so thank you.

@LinaD10 Totally get it! Honestly, read a few articles about how to get over ocd and then follow the suggestions and then get pumped about following through!

Yeah my other big fear is I don’t want to send in a threat and they have to close the school for a day and it’s all my fault

@GJ7 Totally get it. Just remember that when you think these things attribute it to ocd. Your mind doesn't know what your worrying about all it sees is that you're reacting with fear. You need to react with indifference and it will get better.

Totally understand! Do your steps and it will get better eventually. What keeps you from being happy?

@Crawfish HOCD I don’t know who I am anymore

@JS0406 Aww I totally understand how you feel! Really messes with your mind! Make sure your not ruminating or trying to figure out the thoughts or what they mean about you. I found what helps is always reminding myself that it's always ocd and not me. This is super hard at the beginning but honestly it gets way better as you don't give it any attention. After about a few weeks it starts to lose its grip and you're able to think clearly. Are you avoiding or ruminating about something specific?

@Crawfish Avoiding people in general and analysing my past.

@JS0406 Yea that's typical for this. Try and not avoid. What works well is when you know you have the opportunity to expose yourself to a trigger and get prepared for it. This will give your confidence and help you to deal with triggers when you're not in control

@Crawfish Will I ever be happy again, I’ve lost all hope in life.

@JS0406 Yes you honestly will! I was in an extremely dark place to and what helped was doing my steps and working really hard on not giving into my compulsions and reminding myself it's ocd and not even getting into it with my ocd. This helped a huge amount and within a few months I was sooo much better and my happiness was back!

Like going on them and trying not to react. Like I feel when I’m on those apps I might make a threat so I challenge the thoughts by going on the apps. But you’re sure I wouldn’t get put into jail or anything and you think my friend is right?

@GJ7 Oh thTs a great exposure! Keep doing that! And I can't give you reassurance about this buuut just a reminder to follow your steps to recover. It's hard to live with these thoughts but remember these thoughts arent you. Compare it to someone else saying these things. It's not you and don't pay attention to them

@Crawfish I really just need to know that I won’t get put into jail and then I can fully take it on. I swear I won’t ask you for anything else

@GJ7 Also I don’t get how I’ll ever get over this. Won’t I always associate these apps with making a threat?

@GJ7 You won't! It's all good!

@Crawfish Okay I’ll trust you!

@GJ7 Only if you continue to not do your recovery steps. but if you view these apps as an exposure and you now need to do your response prevention, then they can be helpful. But you need to do the response prevention not just the exposure

@Crawfish Yeah I attempt to

@Crawfish I meant trust that I won’t go to jail

What's up!

@Crawfish I've relapsed again, I cant see things being better

@Daffodil That's ok that you relapsed! This is going to happen. Choose now to not give into ocd. Don't worry about the past relapses just focus now on not showing fear towards your ocd! You can do this! Remember when the thoughts come in say no! It's my ocd I'm done!