“I love you” vent

I think our definition of love evolves with time and experience, and is also different depending on our partner. IMO, companion love is the most sustainable. The kind where you’re friends who genuinely enjoy one another’s company, can work through conflict successfully, are respectful and supportive of one another (and are also attracted to each other!). But I think love can look differently in everyone’s relationships because the people in the relationship are the only ones who define what behavior is acceptable, what your expectations are, set boundaries, etc. As you acknowledged, I do think it’s important not to string her along if you’re uncertain or doubtful. I think being honest about where you’re at is important. You’ll encounter a lot of struggles in life and your partnership. Maybe this is a hurdle that can be worked through together. Wishing you both the best!

You are not alone whatsoever. I have ROCD and often worry if I love my partner “enough”, I would agree that one of my biggest fears is secretly hurting my partner, wondering if they would be better off with someone that loved them better. Currently in a really bad flare myself😅. Relationship OCD is sooo sticky and complicated, unfortunately we cannot have all of the answers. I hope knowing you’re not alone is somewhat comforting. Sending you well wishes

I feel like we learn what love is from straight media and not only is it fictional but it doesn't take queerness into account. Maybe love is feeling really peaceful with someone, and not a lightning bolt.