- Username
- Batman
- Date posted
- 6y ago
I suffer with checking OCD and my husband never wanted me to 'believe I had OCD' (as he put it) he just thought it was anxiety and I'd get over this phase I was going through. We had loads of arguments where I was fed up of him not accepting that I do indeed suffer from OCD. If he didn't understand it just made me feel stupid- as his opinions mean a lot to me. He now gets it finally! ( don't get me wrong he finds it difficult to deal with as some days Are harder than others for me and so he obviously feels that with me too) but I managed to break it down to him that does he ever have times when he massively doubted an action or a decision he made and that he just needs to go back and check and then I asked him to magnify that feeling a lot! And to understand that checking once just doesn't cut it...he seems to understand a bit more now and he tells me that whenever those occasional moments have happened to him he does now think of me and realised how much it must affect me and as he can just check once and feel okay about it.
With my family I share content about what it feels like to go through an OCD episode. There is an example on the treatmyocd website that works well. It’s easier for people to read about what ocd is like then hearing it from someone verbally IMO
Don’t blame yourself for your ocd. Ocd is not you. It’s difficult for people without ocd to understand what’s going on, so I don’t blame them. But I also don’t blame you, and you shouldn’t blame yourself. If you don’t already, I recommend seeing a therapist or a counselor. This app will hopefully help though
@Cjx: it’s in the “Learn About OCD” section I believe
I had a lot of strain on so many close relationships due to OCD and my eating disorder (which I now am in recovery from). I was able to repair the relationship with my parents and build that trust back up that I broke. A lot of relationships healed. Some didn’t. My best friend at the time, we aren’t close anymore. I blame the ocd and my eating disorder. But I guess some people just aren’t supposed to take this journey with us. Some are. It is hard and it sucks. I still think “if only this didn’t happen...if only I didn’t have my ocd and eating disorder, we would still be best friends.” But not everyone is prepared or equipped to go on this journey with us. I hope you can repair the relationships that have suffered! We are here for you ♥️♥️
Mjs110160 where is it on the website?
Thank you everyone for your comments. I’ve tried reaching out and explaining things they just got more frustrated. I don’t know if I got through to them or if I’ve placed even more strain. I guess time will tell. I tried explaining in terms of a contamination obsession I have so that they can see how it goes in your head. “If i valet my car then I’ll get lice.” Ironically they just got frustrated and me to stop “overthinking things” which is the main predicament of my entire existence. If I could I would. I wish people understood that more.
Feeling so lost and overwhelmed. My ocd has been focused on my boyfriend for the past year. We had a rough patch and he made some new friends at work. I then became obsessed he fancied one of them and went through all his messages and obsessively questioned him. He has stood by the fact he didn’t like her like that and other people who speak to him about it think he didn’t. He’s spoken to my therapist and tried to help, but I just can’t get it in my head he’s not lying. The things I believe to be ‘evidence may aren’t really telling. I found out they were still chatting on insta once she left his company but the convo was fairly platonic - they were just talking about work and the new people. She did make a comment it would be more fun if I was still there, but she is french so there is a slight language barrier (I thought this sounded flirty). She also messaged him about a festival she was at with her boyfriend. He said they are very in love and moved in together and from her social media they seem that way. I also once came home and picked up his phone and it opened onto a video of her he’d been watching which he’d filmed of her falling asleep in the office. He said he’d just been flicking through his videos but I became obsessed he was really missing her. All my family and friends think he’s telling the truth. He’s taken me to doctors appointments and keeps telling me the power is in my hands. I told him the other day I’ve spent the past year imagining the things I believe to be true and negatively reinforcing it and said it’s hard to unlearn. He was upset by this and said why have you done that when I’m not lying. He said that if what he’s told me isn’t enough that’s okay. Maybe I can’t get over the fact he had this friend and I can’t trust what he said. Prior to this we’d been together happily for 5 years. He’s now said we’ve spent a year unhappy, me not trusting him and breaking down. He said he wants to really move on with life, start saving for a house etc and has asked me to draw a line under this. He’s broken up with me 3 times in the past to give me a wake up call that he cannot take the questioning and yet I still feel I don’t believe him. I was cheated on in the past and I think that’s really traumatised me. I don’t want my ocd to force me to leave him. It’s seems so unfair, had I not had ocd I wouldn’t have viewed it like this. But maybe I can’t get over it - even though nothing has happened. I feel so bad for putting him through this and so bad I’m not helping myself either. Just want some kind words. Has anyone else ever had their ocd stop them from being able to see things clearly or how other people do?
Hello dear friends. I hadn't been on this app for a while, I've been getting by. Today I just need to vent and to feel validated and understood. I have OCD, I consider myself in permanent recovery. It is an everyday job. I am ina relationship with a wonderful guy. I deeply love and care about him, but he doesn't understand anything about OCD. I've explained it to him a million times. I've directed him to online resources. I've talked him through what to do to help me get out of a loop without giving me reassurance. And yet, he never knows what to say or do when an episode appears. It is tiring to pull myself out of the loop and then having yo explain to him what just happened to me, over and over again. I think, in general, he lacks empathy for other people's feelings, but, when it comes to me, I can see that he tries but achieves nothing. I think I don't have ROCD, I have diverse thoughts. But the last few weeks this thought got into my mind: what if he has met someone else and they are texting each other and flirting and he's gonna leave me? (He left his girl to start a new relationship with me). And he are apart due to the covid-19 epidemic, so we didn't see each other almost at all during last year. Of course, I had been able to keep this particular thought to myself, buy yesterday, it just came out of my mind after him not picking up the phone. He was in shock. He reacted defensively (which I completely understand), replied that he had nothing to explain to me as to why he couldn't answer the phone when I called him and that we was surprised that I asked him such a thing (if the reason why he didn't answer me was that he was talking to someone else). I knew it was just an OCD thought of mine, but I just couldn't keep it to myself any longer. Of course, I apologized to him and had to explain it had been an OCD thought. He was supporting and understanding and told me everything was ok and to forget about it. This morning I feel sad that he couldn't recognize this for what it was despite all the explaining I have done. I have dealt with my ocd on my own, despite being in a relationship. I just needed to vent and would like to read your thoughts about this whole thing. Thank you in advance for reading and replying.
I'm currently on a break with my new partner of 3 months because I haven't been able to make them understand what my relapse has been like. What has the conversation around OCD been like for you and your partner? Do you give them resources? How much do you tell? Do you tell about triggers as they happen?
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