- Username
- catattak
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I get this feeling all the time!!! Like in the moment you feel powerful and that you got this and you can beat it. But then it’s almost like literally fighting with ocd. At least that’s how I think of it. So for instance you throw a punch and knock you opponent (your ocd) off balance and your feeling pumped buuut then your opponent gets back up and tries swinging at you! Therefore giving in to the compulsion would be like taking a hit. But if you duck and it misses you (not giving in) it will scare you at first because the fights not over. But your still going strong so go ahead and throw another punch!
Wow that is such a good analogy!! I'm going to screen shot this and come back to it. I love that! As much as I'm still nervous, this is a great explanation!
@catattak Well think of it as who wouldn’t be nervous during a fight! (Not that I have ever been in one haha but I think we have all seen stuff on TV and movies)
@StefH It's so true! I came back to this post this morning already to re-read your analogy and it helps so much
I only recently realized how much OCD is about re-hashing questions you’ve already come to a decision to. You decided “Towel is clean.” Later, OCD says, “You sure...?” And you think, “Oh...maybe it wasn’t! Maybe I made the wrong choice!” You made a decision in a moment when you weren’t super anxious. But later in an anxious moment, you began to second your decision.
Such a good point. And now I'm like, "do I trust past me?". I've made the decision to trust past me. I have not sanitized my phone and I will ot be washing my hands for the millionth time before bed. I will just be dealing with it. But I could definitely see it saying put differently if it weren't a towel with clean hands. I sanitized my kitchen and I bet any money, in the morning when it's worse, I will be glaring at my kitchen all morning, walking on egg shells and trying my hardest to tell myself not to sanitize again
@catattak You can do it!!
@Alyosha Thank you so much!!
@catattak You already took a step forward so you got this!!!
That's me exactly . I then find myself slipping and thinking it's not worth being strong in the first place just to get knocked down worse later.
I can completely relate. So many of the above comments helped me though. I'm going to stay strong and you will too :)
@catattak I'm trying ?I have to as I'm running out of hand towels
(Sorry analogies really help me personally)
Its perfect
This happens to me alllll the time. I feel so good about touching something that I deem dirty or contaminated and then carry on with my business. And then boom! The ocd comes along and makes me want to crawl out of my skin with feeling dirty and tells me to do all my compulsions and rituals ten times over. I think it's the nature of the ocd to never let you catch a break or feel like you're coming out on top of it because if you are, it means it's losing its hold on you and that's the last thing it wants. My OCD had been out of control horrible lately and I truly believe it's because I'm starting erp and trying to get rid of it so it's digging in.
Thank you so much for sharing your relatable experience. You obviously carry on right? It makes me wonder if I should have just tossed the towel in the wash to begin with but I dont want to feed obsessions that arent there yet. Or even ones that arent there at all.
@catattak Honestly, I've been terrible with resisting the compulsions. I have such a hard time just being like, "eh, it is what it is." I am very much not a "it is what it is", let things roll off my back type person. Im really hoping erp will help improve my ability to just deal with the uncertainty and not start the ocd spiral even hours after something happens.
@ans87 I'm usually a "meh" person but never have been when it comes to fears of getting sick. Even before a pandemic, the thought of getting a cold was overwhelming because it meant I might need a sock day or I might not be able to perform my best at work and people would judge me. Literally anything else can roll off my back, but not fears of getting sick.
@catattak That makes sense. I mean, my dad has serious health issues to the point where even a cold could be disastrous so that adds to my already heightened concerns about touching everything. I think part of the reason why my ocd is so severe is because of the fact that not having control over a situation is one of the worst case scenarios for me. So my ocd obviously feeds off of that.
@ans87 Yes I think that's it's for me too. Getting sick means I'm no longer in control. Actually my therapist identified that for me a year or so ago and it's sort of making sense again. If I'm sick, I can only control my performance to an extent. I can take cold pills but ultimately how sick I get is not up to me and the length of time it takes me to get better is also out of my control.
@ans87 I’m in the same boat as you! I hate uncertainty! Not even just OCD uncertainty but even when it comes to making plans or anything I’m not the type of “fly by the seat of your pants” (or whatever the saying is) type of person which makes this all that much harder!
My thought process currently: my dog pooped on the floor. Husband cleaned it up with toilet paper. However he did not use a disinfectant or even a wet wipe. Dog walked in the same area the poop was not cleaned appropriately. Dog jumped in my lap, I figured since I was about to shower it would be okay and I let her lay all over me and I pet her. Then I held my phone. After I took a shower, I picked up my phone without first disinfecting it, now my hands feel horribly dirty. I’m scared I will spread germs that the dog may have spread to me and I spread to my phone. However my husband is telling me it will be alright, be strong and don’t wash my hands or disinfect my phone and watch as nothing bad happens. Is this a legit reason to clean my phone and hands or is this just the OCD talking??
Hygiene ocd. Recently I’ve been plagued with constantly washing my hands and fear of contamination. My biggest dilemma right now is I used the washroom this morning and the soap dispenser was near empty. I was able to get a little bit enough to make suds and washed my hands. However after waking up and touching the milk container / making breakfast. I feel as if the germs from my hands may have gotten to the container. So I spilled it out and now I can’t stop thinking what it the germs are all inside my fridge now. Annnd it’s supper time and I’m suppose to somehow cook dinner for my kid ?? Ocd please go away....
I guess this is kind of reassurance seeking, but I'm curious as to what is "normal" for non-contamination ocd people. Do you guys wash your hands after handling things in your house? After literally just stepping out of the shower, I just accidentally touched something I purchased today. Normally I would wash my hands, but my husband discouraged me from doing so because he knew it would start a spiral of still not feeling clean and wanting to wipe things down. So then I had to open my drawers, put on my pajamas, and get into bed/touch our clean bedding. I'm obviously veryyyy uncomfortable. Is this something that would even register as a red flag on anyone's radar? I know some people have taken to wiping groceries down during the pandemic, but that's not the concern in this case.
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