- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
I love this explanation! Thank you!
- Date posted
- 4y
This helped me so much
- Date posted
- 4y
Really helpful info. Thank you.
- Date posted
- 4y
"pain should be confronted to be defeated" I like that. I need to hear this today.
- Date posted
- 4y
This is spot-on. If you were an alcoholic, you wouldn't continue to give yourself alcohol (i.e., perform compulsions). Resist and see the change :)
- Date posted
- 4y
Did you recover from OCD? You seem to have such a accurate perspective on this disorder.
- Date posted
- 4y
I just started my process. I had OCD most of my life, but was very comfortable with it, the recent world situation and personal issues got my subconscious mind to scare me so much, I had no choice but to change. I did all I could to learn and connect dots from all sources I found. I still keep on connecting the dots. Mind Over Matter. đ¤
- Date posted
- 4y
When you mention a lack of self love, this video popped up in my mind. I do agree that, at least for me, this might have happened due to a lack of self love. But your addiction analysis, having an addictive personality myself, seems to be a very plausible theory on ocd mechanisms. https://youtu.be/Q9yKaI0vLJs
- Date posted
- 4y
Hi, Lack of sufficient self love, is a common feature and repeating pattern for the great majority of anxiety conditions, which OCD is part of, so we are all here coming from the same place. All humans need to feel good, when it doesnt come naturaly by ourselves, we give this power over us to either a certain external factor, behaviour, or drug, to do it for us. Thats why addiction and OCD are usually cooccuring. They stem from the same root, the need to be loved, to feel good about ourselves.
- Date posted
- 4y
It does make a lot of sense. I knownit wont happen overnight, but when I do try to be kind and love myself, Im immediately flooded with guilt or intrusive thoughts.
- Date posted
- 4y
@luchalysol Happens to me to, and many others. Thats the subsconscious part of us sabotaging. Thats why we keep at it, until this door is unlocked. I think if we trace to the roots of addictions and OCD, both stem from insufficient self love. Kind of explaining why some peole get easily addicted to drugs and alcohol and others don't. All humans need to feel good, when it doesnt come naturaly by ourselves, we give this power over us to either a certain external factor, behaviour, or drug, to do it for us. Thats why I believe perhaps that OCD is not only about recovery, but rather acquiring a new mindset for a lifetime of correct and healthy self management, practicing everyday self love and relaxation.
- Date posted
- 4y
@DavidS I can see that. Ive always had somewhat of a fear of being a bad person. But it skyrocketed when I had what I now believe was an onset of cleanliness ocd. I was worried about having bad breath, almost suddenly, brushed my teeth multiple times a day. I started avoiding people because of it. I then became so insecure that I developed an aloofness and superiority complex to mask my insecurities which then led to me realizing I was wrong, feeling guilty and horrible. And now I have harm, moral, responsibility ocd, manifesting mostly as pure o.
- Date posted
- 4y
@luchalysol This is where the trap is. Guilt, shame, and thinking we are bad people is exactly where the subconscious mind pulls us towards- the Compulsion. The Reaction (Your part) to the Action (Subconscious mind/Unsolicited/Cravings/Obssessions). Determine you are not playing this game. You do not perform any Reaction thought feeling nor behaviour based on the on the Action of the subcondcious mind. You know way better how to feel happy and relaxed. https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.madeofmillions.com/ocd/pure-ocd/amp
- Date posted
- 4y
Comment deleted by user
- Date posted
- 4y
Im working on it everyday. I want my life and the old me back. I hear stories from my chikdhood and I just cry cause idk what happened to me. Ive always felt a bit inadequate and unloved by many, but I was always cheerful. Now Im a shell of who I used to be. I dont want to be a bad person, I just want me back.
- Date posted
- 4y
I am glad this approach makes sense. I find it somehow simplifying the recovery and explaining how both challanges 'addiction' and 'ocd' are more similar than not. As Yoda said: one must unlearn what they have learned đ¤
- Date posted
- 4y
I donât agree at all. I am sorry but thatâs not what I feel. How can you be so sure? Like you beat OCD comparing it to a drug knowing that thousands of people are still trying to figure out a way out of it and trying to better understand its mechanisms. OCD is such a difficult and multifaceted problem that we need to be open mind. Imagine just for a second your theory doesnât hold up. It means you stuck in a world where you have zero chances to overcome your OCD because the way you see it is wrong. But of course u free to believe whatever u believe itâs true.
- Date posted
- 4y
Nothing in what I wrote changes the approaches currently offered, but perhaps it will help find new approaches. Have you noticed how drug addicts that went through rehabe tend to mention how many days, weeks, months, years they are drug-free? What they actually say is, yes they do get thoughts, but they don't act upon it. Same here, yes thoughts can come unsolicited but what counts is our response, or actually lack of it.
- Date posted
- 4y
@DavidS Iâm a recovering addict and totally agree with you
- Date posted
- 4y
@Kat2244 Prop to you for recovering from an addiction. That must take a lot of strength and dedication.
- Date posted
- 4y
@Kat2244 Thank you Kat2244 I hope it will help gain new coping skills for recovery, and maybe one day the scientific communities will find new ways to assist.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w
â¤ď¸we all just want it to be over already, but do not set a deadline for your recovery (e.g. "i give myself 3 months to get better") and let yourself go at your own pace â¤ď¸accept that healing is a very, very non-linear process with highs and very dark lows.. it's a lifelong process for us those with ocd, when you stop suffering you start learning ! â¤ď¸WITHOUT ruminating on this, identify the root of your obsessive themes. they hurt so much because they go after your deepest wounds. clearing out the fear or pain that stands at the base of your obsessions will help (e.g. my sexual ocd came as an emotional outlet for my inability to accept a new family member in my life) (e.g. my solipsism ocd came from the deep fear of being alone and abandoned) â¤ď¸the truth will always surface. even if you have no hope anymore and not even asking for reassurance helps, put that last bit of your trust in the other people that are in good states of mind and who are trying to help you. remember that you're living by a distorted mind and if you can't trust your own brain, have trust in others. those who love you are your life net when you're down in the slumps. trust me. â¤ď¸ocd can be caused by chemical imbalance. if you feel like you need it, don't be reluctant to try medication. it's important to have the correct dose and the correct meds. it may change a lot before finally being effective, but it can help A LOT. it was lifesaving for me. (I personally took 125 mg sertraline at 14 years old) â¤ď¸cliche, but the exposure part of erp is in you already. we get exposed to relentless obsessions and terrors already by our minds, our part is the response prevention. throw yourself into the depths of uncertainty and fear by refusing to act upon your compulsions. any learned behavior can be unlearned, our brains are changing! đ§ it does feel like we can't risk because we can't "know for sure" and we better be safe than sorry, right? well, screw this. unlearn these behavior and live life your own way. â¤ď¸connect with other people with ocd. community is our pillar as humans, especially those communities who share our suffering. â¤ď¸we tend to ask for reassurance a lot and other just reassure us because it's rational to them, not being aware thar it only causes us more pain as we have distoerted thinking. teach your loved ones to respond to your reassurance in a way that doesn't feed the cycle. (e.g. reassurance seeking- "hey, are you ABSOLUTELY SURE that I didn't hit an animal on the way back home??" âď¸wrong response- "no, you didn't, I already told you, I don't remember hearing or seeing anything!" â ď¸better response- "I can see you are really distressed right now, why don't we go cook something together/watch a movie/paint together/etc.." â¤ď¸keep your faith close to you. there is something bigger around us that surrounds us with love and takes care of us. even if you don't believe in a god, spirituality goes beyond religion. for me, this higher being was the sky, and everytime I saw the giant clouds I'd tell myself that they felt my emotions and they're watching over in my suffering. strangely enough, this pillar i built in the clouds was strong and really did give me a helping hand. who's to tell these connections we make are not real?
- Date posted
- 24w
Common posts on here are "i had a thought" "why am i thinking this" "what if" and these are all OCDs way of making you doubt yourself while taking you round and round in never ending circles at the same time. Regardless of the theme you are facing, there is no "figuring out" or "making sense" of a thought, because it isn't a real situation - it's a passing word or image or scenario without any meaning attached. You can't control your thoughts and the more you "don't want to have them" the more they will appear. For instance, tell yourself not to think about "apples", it will be the first thing that comes to your mind, because that's just how our minds work. Once you categorise a thought as "bad", every time it comes into your mind, your anxiety level will go up and this makes the thought seem real. Because if it "Feels" this bad, surely it must mean something or must have happened - But none of this is true. All we have to do is naturally notice thoughts as they come up, and rather than try to assess or ruminate over the content, we can almost shrug them off. It's the only way to accept thoughts as simply thoughts and nothing more. Anxiety drives the intense feeling and the more attention you give to thoughts, the more power they have over you. No random thought can change your real intentions. OCD is never ever satisfied, so the only way forward is to accept the uncertainty of never knowing "for sure" and to class the unwanted thought as irrelevant. OCD says "quick..bad thought..feels horrible.. what does it mean.. fix it". But in reality there is nothing bad here or nothing to be fixed, it's a false alarm. Once you learn to respond to a thought calmly by working on anxiety, it gets easier over time. It's your perception of your thoughts that needs to change, you believe they mean something about you, but random things pop into our heads all the time - both things we like and things we don't. OCD also latches onto what we care about most and it always comes with a feared consequence, so think about what yours is, e.g "what happens if my worst fear comes true" you can then practice imaginal exposure which is imagining your worst case scenario over and over until you become desensitised to it and no longer fear it - therapists use this technique in sessions. Everyone in the world has thoughts, the thoughts are not the issue, you just get more of what you focus on, up until the point that you can change your attitude towards the thought. If I asked you if you went upstairs today you would have an answer straight away, however if I asked you a question related to your OCD theme, your anxiety would increase and you would doubt yourself, because that's OCD doing the thinking for you. Once you give it less power it becomes a less significant part of your day. It's so easy to give into compulsions as they feel like a "quick fix".. but as I mentioned, ocd is never happy, which is why it wants us to continue to check and seek reassurance. Once you start reducing and gradually stopping compulsions, whether this is rumination, checking, or a physical action (whatever you falsely believe is "keeping you safe" from your feared consequence) you will see it's not necessary to do them, and that the time consuming little things you have taught yourself to do have no effect on what actually happens in real life. Thoughts prompt feelings and feelings prompt actions - meaning - thoughts cause anxiety and anxiety drives unnecessary actions. As a side note, I overcame contamination ocd (I was in a very very bad way and now the theme doesn't bother me anymore). I still have OCD and it can affect me slightly at times, but i can manage it in a way that it doesn't interfere with my day and without the need to carry out compulsions. Please practice, because I promise it helps, it's super scary at first and extremely difficult but the end result is worth it. ERP therapy is also very helpful.
- Date posted
- 6w
The subject of OCD matters to the sufferer because it feels like confirmation that they are fundamentally unlovable and unwantedâas if even existence itself doesnât want them. They feel like an error, carrying a deep sense of guilt and shame, as if they were inherently wrong. They suffer from low self-esteem and a deep internalized shame, because long ago, they were fragmented and learned a pattern of fundamental distrustâespecially self-distrust. But the real trouble doesnât come from the content of the most vile or taboo thoughts. It comes from the fact that the sufferer lacks self-love. Thatâs why, when you begin to walk the road to recovery, youâre taught unconditional self-acceptanceâbecause thatâs what all sufferers of OCD have in common: if you arenât 100% sure, if there isnât absolute certainty, the doubt will continue to attack you and your core values. It will make you doubt everythingâeven your own aversion to the thoughts. You have to relearn how to trust yourselfânot because you accept that you might become a murderer somedayâbut because you enter a deep state of acceptance about who you truly are. Itâs not about becoming a monster at all. Itâs about making peace with what lies at the root of the fear. Making peace with the guilt. With the shame. Making peace with yourself and the person you fear you might be. Because that fear is not rooted in reality. Itâs not rooted in any true desire to act. Itâs rooted in your identityâspecifically, in what might threaten it. Thatâs what confirms the belief that you are fundamentally wrong. And OCD fuels that belief by using intrusive taboo thoughts to attack your very sense of self. But then I wonder: letâs say, for example, someone fears being or becoming a sexually dangerous personâhow could that person practice unconditional self-acceptance? I would never accept myself if I were to harm anyoneâthe thought alone makes me want to cry. I know itâs not about whether or not someone acts on the thought. Itâs about the core fear underneath it. So how do you accept yourself when the thoughtsâand the feelings around themâfeel so completely unacceptable ?
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