So last night I wrote this on Facebook to my friends and family: Please don’t describe yourself as “so OCD” if you don’t actually have it and make it seem like less of a struggle than it genuinely is for people who do. OCD for me means my mind is always loud and running at a fast speed. OCD means insomnia and nights with 3-4 hours sleep. OCD means if I don’t want to be late in the morning I need to give myself 3 hours to get ready. OCD means everything around me has to be perfect or I can’t concentrate. OCD means carrying out the simplest task can cause a massive amount of stress. OCD means relief when I arrive at work because I have finally gotten myself out of the house, no matter how long it took! I get to work and my stress levels surprisingly reduce because one of the toughest parts of my day is over! And it’s a heap of other things I deal with! OCD is something most people don’t see. I laugh about it when I can but it sucks 🙄 people understanding it better helps ❤️ I’m just sick of people using it as a phrase and making it sound like no big deal!

OCD is so much more than just being 'neat' or 'organized'—it’s relentless, exhausting, and often deeply misunderstood. The intrusive thoughts, the compulsions, the anxiety—it can feel like a never-ending cycle that others just don’t seem to get. Many of us have had experiences where even therapists didn’t fully grasp the depth of our struggles. I myself faced difficulty being misdiagnosed and my talk therapist not understanding the full extent of what I was going through until I found NOCD. So many prior therapists wrote off my symptoms as general anxiety, not realizing it was actually OCD all along. If you could sit down with a therapist who truly wanted to understand, what do you wish they knew about OCD?

I’ve come to a point in my life where I can be very happy. I have a safe environment, a loving community. Yknow I’ve really healed through or moved on from a traumatic past and as I say to my boyfriend from time to time like a broken record: I feel like nowadays the only thing bringing me stress or at times misery is myself. I am a fairly joyful person, when I’m comfortable I’m very goofy and like to sing dance and have fun. I find that I relate to so many amazing people I meet that are the nicest, most fun, elevating individuals, who also struggle with the hardest sometime debilitating things. It truly sucks because when I find those moments of peace I see the power of what an ocd mind could be as a person. We are people who may over analyze, but I myself also always find the good in people. And aye if in a moment I don’t think anything is doomly wrong and if I don’t try to understand it I may parish 😅 then that moment feels like the best one in the world. But on the other side of that when I’m not in a quiet mind moment and I’m left with myself to take control of what life in front of me looks like in or around me. I almost have been crumbling. Like I said at the beginning of this story here, the life around me is not so situationally stressful. And it’s also fairly simple. My boyfriend and I live together in a small cozy trailer with our two cats, he works full time very hard and I work part time where I spend as much time as I can working and then have a few days around the house. We’re saving for a home and are quite content with our lifestyle at the moment with work and being “lazy”, or resting and going out for fun now an then on our time off together. Most times though I do have day or two off during the week by myself, which usually goes one of only two ways. Like I said before I do like to work hard, especially now that I have a part time job that’s fairly easier than others I’ve had in the past. So I work 6-7 hours then drive home, air up my tires and wash my car sometimes because I like doing something after work while I still have energy.Or I go to the store. Come home make food, prolly nap and not really worry about too much because I’ve worked all day. But on my days off. I find myself waking up with a lot of anxiety. I usually fight it off by going back to sleep. But my OCD is heavily circled around shame. Even though I only sleep in till 10-11, 12-1 at the latest. I find myself thinking about how wrong (in nice terms) it is to do that. And the funny thing is the older I get (I’m a 21F). I’m not as pressured by this thought, even though it’s still stressful it literally just feels like a thought I can’t escape from. To put things in simple terms. I truly psycho analyze my actions breath by breath and my intrusive thoughts are critiquing those actions bit by bit. I’ve recently have started medication and it was a tremendous difference in the beginning and it helped me cope with the acceptance and letting go (f it or just care less) of those thoughts. But let’s say I forget to take it, or I wake up one morning by myself all day and I’m super tired or unmotivated. That day will feel truly debilitated. And now I’m definitely to the point where I’m battling that, but also have a thin vale behind that where I now know what is going on. And the thoughts are shameful for “not trying to get better or be better” Because I do Like I write a lot, and it truly is one of the best coping mechanisms for working through intrusive or obsessive compulsions. I could also write all day, and if I don’t listen to that ease of the anxiety from writing. And try to keep going the writing will turn into a compulsion itself I feel like I should not stop or critique it as well. But luckily I’ll hopefully find my place in explaining the cycle of what I do when my brain is very loud about things. The next time it’s too loud:)

OCD isn’t just about compulsions—it’s a mental battle that can be completely exhausting. The anxiety, doubt, and pressure to "get it right" can feel unbearable, especially when others don’t understand what’s happening beneath the surface. What’s the hardest part about living with OCD that others don’t see?