- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
Oh my finally someone I can relate to!! I like can’t let go of things from months ago that he already apologized for but my ocd latches on to how he acted and how he said sorry and wants it a certain way and is like he didn’t really seem that sorry and he didn’t necessarily but stilllll!! I never know if things are in my head or if the relationship is over and he’s a jerk
- Date posted
- 4y
YES OMG ....... i literally relate to this SO HARD. if it’s okay with you, my instagram is urfairiegf i would love to talk to u about this!!
- Date posted
- 4y
@zoya ACAB IM DOWN!
- Date posted
- 4y
100%
- Date posted
- 4y
If your partner does something that’s considered a serious mistake, (for example: cheating or hiding/lying about something they know would hurt you), you should leave. Obsessing over the incident is your brain telling you what to do. You stay because your heart says to. “Serious Mistakes” don’t happen with someone who truly loves/wants to be with you. I held on to a guy who was oh so very sorry many times for different mistakes. He always appeared to be sincere and ashamed while apologizing. I eventually even married him. Wasted 13 years because I allowed myself to foolishly believe things would improve. It was extremely difficult and painful when I left him, but now (almost 2 years since the divorce was finalized) I am finally putting myself first and realize I should have listened to my brain and not my heart. All relationships have problems. All bicker/argue. There is no “perfect” relationship. There is a time to know when to leave though! Don’t waste yourself on someone that doesn’t return your feelings and does unforgivable actions!
- Date posted
- 4y
The thing is, he doesn’t fully show his emotions when he says sorry and so I can never tell and he doesn’t lie and he says he is sorry but I’ve seen him when we were broken up and he sincerely seemed sorry because he would send paragraphs of how sorry he was I mean it was bigger and we were broken up. But he is not a very emotional guy and me having rocd im very very emotional. Sometimes I just wanna feel loved and stuff but I don’t and Idek if that’s a symptom or not. Like I don’t know if it’s in my head or not that he’s not putting effort but I told him my love language and he every now and then compliments me and stuff but never like tells me how he feels about me as if He’s in his feels cuz he isn’t a “phone type of guy” as he told me, he’s more in person and I haven’t seen him for a month. Idk if it’s my ocd playing tricks on me. I just don’t know how to forgive him for past mistakes until he actually seems sorry so I’m waiting it out to see him again.
- Date posted
- 4y
this triggered me really badly. i purposely left out the serious mistake bc it wasn’t as bad as cheating or lying. he called me a name that was rude (for the first time, this wasn’t repeat behavior) and then told me it was a serious mistake and would never happen again. his way of apologizing to me is acknowledging what he did wrong and then promising to never do it again, which is exactly what he does. there are no “should”’s in a relationship (excluding the obvious like abuse). no offense but telling me to “listen to my brain” isn’t very smart considering i have ocd.......please put a tw next time.
- Date posted
- 4y
Please put a 'tw' before posting something like this. All relationships are different and some issues due to rocd are just that. You have to resolve the ocd before you can make that kind of distinction.
- Date posted
- 4y
This comment does cause a lot of anxiety because it is different with rocd, it’s hard to see the trueness of your relationship so to leave isn’t the best advice
- Date posted
- 4y
Don't give relationship advice to someone you don't know. I know you're just trying to help but this is not helpful on an app about the disorder that is proclaimed the "doubting disorder".
- Date posted
- 4y
I’m 30 years old and have been diagnosed with numerous OCDs including ROCD. My years of struggling to leave my relationship was because it was hard to see the trueness. I wouldn’t listen to anyone and I always defended him. I posted my comment hoping to help someone not make the same mistake I did. Sorry for being honest about it. Everyone’s relationship is different but there’s never reason to harm someone you love by what you do. I said to leave if the problem was unforgivable, not just leave no matter what.
- Date posted
- 4y
I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to diss your feelings because they matter. I’m so sorry that happened to you. I am hoping it is my rocd but I haven’t seen him for a month and I am hoping that he works on it and maybe once I do erp for once, that i can see clearly.
- Date posted
- 4y
And the guy I was with didn’t show emotions often either but would act very genuine when telling me sorry...every time... Just hoping others don’t allow a repeat offender to cause the pain I endured.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 21w
Does Rocd make it nearly impossible to forgive your partner for anything. Whether it is big or small? My situation is so gray area where there’s something my bf did that I feel like I’m not okay with but he did this when we were first dating (not bf and gf yet). I ruminate all day about it bc I don’t want to lose him and see a future with him and I know he loves me so purely. But I also feel like I’m going against my morals here bc I do feel betrayed by what he did. I try to forgive him by diminishing my feelings and telling myself “he never did anything physical with a girl or went out with another girl while we were together” but still feel so hurt that he even messaged another girl while us dating. He’s given me an explanation and has proved how much I can trust him so I’m just completely stuck on whether I should forgive something I know I would’ve never done to him or leave him even though the only thing he’s done wrong was before us becoming official. I’ve broken up with him countless times over this situation bc I feel like I “can’t live with it” but then immediately when we break up I want him back and I kind of understand his explanation and reasoning. I don’t know what is ocd and what is my real intuition anymore. I genuinely think it’s both. Are any of you guys in the same boat?
- Date posted
- 21w
I'm 18, and been in a relationship with my man for nearly 2 years. I started living with him around 2 months ago, and all I do is think about if he's cheating. We were long distance for a year and a half of our relationship, maybe seeing eachother once every month or two. I decided to move in with him, and ever since all I can think about is if he's cheating or watching porn. When he's in another room I think he's doing something wrong, I have to check on him every ten minutes to ease my anxiety. I didn't have this problem before moving in. Granted he has talked to some girls on his phone, even having his ex on his phone (didn't do anything bad) and he is porn addicted though he is getting better for me. It's gotten so bad I want to leave him. A couple days ago I broke up with him and it absolutely broke my heart, I couldn't bare it so I gave him a month to show me he can do better, and for me to work on myself. If I'm still unhappy with us I'm going to leave. I love this boy more than anything. I'm scared to be without him, this is my first real relationship. At this point I refuse to even sleep until he is sleeping. I don't want to start over, I don't want to leave him, but I really can't take this pain it's causing me. It's all I think about. I've convinced myself so many times that he's cheating, but I know he wouldn't. I question whether it's anxiety or intuition. Maybe I just know deep down he really is cheating and I just don't want to believe it. I don't know. I don't think he would do that, but at the same time he's really into women. I hate that he looks at other girls in a sexual way, it bothers me so much, and we talk about it often, but with it being an addiction it's difficult. He has gotten a lot better since we have talked about it. He understands I have an issue and is usually happy to talk about it over and over and promise me over and over that he's not cheating. He allows me to have his phone whenever I want and everything, I have no reason to think he's cheating, but I can't get over it. It's not fair to him either. How do I deal with this? How do I stop hurting so much?
- Date posted
- 19w
How to stop overthinking my boyfriend is cheating? He’s cheated before yes.. only once!! (not physically cheating BUT Cheating is cheating I get it)…. I’m still trying to heal and not be so insecure and self doubting myself like I did something wrong or that I’m not enough.. he hasn’t done it again since that day but I still overthink and still feel like I need to check through his social media accounts but I still have this fear but it’s like I know he’s not?? Idk if this makes sense I just need some friendly advice!! Please be respectful!! ❤️🩹 I want me and partner to move forward but I constantly keep thinking about it.. that was the one bad thing he’s did in our relationship..we’ve been together for almost two years
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