- Date posted
- 4y ago
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Hey! I haven't experienced this with OCD people on the outside world, as I don't know anyone with it. But I totally get it with general problems! It's like a pure panic feeling of : "Oh no, what's the right thing to say to them??? How do I make it better?? I don't know what's the perfect thing they need in this moment from me. And maybe what I want to say to them ISN'T the perfect right thing to say." so I get really uncomfortable and usually quiet (busy doing compulsions in my head) and hoping for the conversation topic to switch. It could be down to an incorrect belief of responsibility for others. At least for me..
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Thanks for your message ❤️ yess I think a lot of it does come down to the responsibility towards others that I put on myself...
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@Teee123 ❤️Are you in therapy? 😊
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@ButterflyStar No I'm not, are you?
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@Teee123 Yes I am.. For 2 years now this month. Would you like to start therapy? It would be so great for your recovery 😊
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@ButterflyStar I don't think I can afford therapy rn 😩 I wanted to try NOCDs therapy sessions but they don't do it in the country I'm living in
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@ButterflyStar How are you finding therapy?
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I’m exactly the same x
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Aww I'm sorry it's not available. It's not available in my country either. Where do you live? I'm in the UK so I have thankfully been able to get therapy for free through the NHS. Yes its been absolutely crucial. OCD really wiped me out, I wasn't functioning and was very suicidal for a number of long months. But slowly, surely, very very slowly, with this great therapist she has guided me in recovery. I'm still on my journey of recovery but I have came a long way 😊👍
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Awhh that's difficult, im glad you're doing better than before 💕💕 I'm also from UK but I moved to Qatar a year ago and healthcare is expensive here 😭
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@Teee123 Thank you! Aw gosh wow!! What's that like living in Qatar? 😊
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Sometimes when you’re dealing with a mental illness, you can’t be there for others. That’s okay. You’re allowed to ask your friends to talk to someone else about their symptoms, and just talk about friend things with you for a while.
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I totally get this too! I also think it’s feeling like I’m responsable for others. Not really with OCD stuff, but with other people’s general Troubles or worries. People often come to me as I’m kind and caring, but sometimes it’s just too much for my brain! But of course I just stay, listen and panic and become overwhelmed with their/my emotions! I suck them all in like a sponge! Afterwards I just obsess over how to fix people’s problems, or wonder how I could be partially responsible, and what I can do to help! I’ve worn myself out trying to help my best friend with her job.. e.t.c.... e.tc. It’s hard and I feel ya! X I’m also in the UK and have just finally got my first NHS appointmrnt coming up!
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Everything you described is definitely how I am too!! It's so distressing 😔😔 So glad you are getting your help from the NHS yay!! Some things that helped me- Was to ask the therapist, "Have you worked with OCD patients before?" "a lot or just a few?" "what's your method for treating OCD? Would you be eventually taking me through ERP?" depending on how severe your OCD is, and how much this affects your life--you can ask how many sessions you will be given. For me, i was completely not functioning and suicidal because of the OCD and I had to state at the start, look I can't just be given '6 sessions from the NHS' or something like that, I really really need long term help because I cannot survive like this. And thankfully, she has kept to her word and we are in long term treatment. It's been 2 years. And I won't always be in treatment forever😂! But until I can get a hold of OCD and understand how to manage it better. Hope some of that helps and I wish you the very best on your recovery journey 😁😁❤️
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@ButterflyStar Thank you so much for your comment! I feel less alone! I will definitely be asking my therapist the questions you shared! so helpful. It’s really tricky to make sure your getting the right help.. as in the past Nothing has worked long term! I’m sorry you’ve experienced this its really distressing and overwhelming,😞 but I’m so glad your in a better place and on the road to recovery, got what you needed out of therapy, And are in a place to help others! Good luck! X
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@Aheatherb Yes your pains and worries are definitely shared by others, and we will support you!! 😊👍 Aw thank you so much your comment was really lovely! Yes it's hard isn't it when nothing else works. But you did the best thing which is ask for help and enter treatment 😊👍 there are surprisingly a lot of people who do not want to start therapy even with the means to. So well done! 😁😊X
Related posts
- Date posted
- 18w ago
I have this same problem repeatedly where I see things online about faking OCD and people talking about how OCD isn’t just cleaning and it makes me feel like I’m faking it and it’s pretty much its own theme now. I have a handwashing problem and since it’s so heavily stigmatized as faking I never do it when others are watching because then I feel like I’m seeking attention. Pretty much all of my visible compulsions I do are behind closed doors or on my own and I can’t do anything about it because if I try to show somebody then I’m attention seeking and faking. If I try to talk about the fear then I’m also attention seeking because now I’m guilt tripping and seeking sympathy and therefore I shouldn’t tell anyone and I shouldn’t show anyone. I’m essentially hiding an entire mental illness because of this, the only person I’ve ever really told about my issues is my therapist, nobody else feels safe.
- Date posted
- 18w ago
I have a lot of thoughts about the universe, and they’re overwhelming—like being caught in a rip current, except it’s all inside my head. Most of the time, they’re about how small we are, how there really isn’t a “we” because our bodies aren’t truly ours—we’re just bacteria, cells, and microbes. The thoughts spiral, deeper and deeper, smaller and smaller, coiling until suddenly, I’m pulled under, drowning in a whirlpool. I’ve never felt like this before, and I’m convinced I’ve been faking it somehow. For the past few weeks, my OCD has been worse than it’s ever been in my 20 years of life. Or maybe I’m just more aware of it now. Has anyone else had their OCD suddenly get really bad? Does it ever end—if it even can? I’ve convinced myself that my intrusive thoughts aren’t actually intrusive, that my OCD is a choice, and that everything I do is intentional. As for compulsions, I don’t have the typical “If I don’t do ____ then ____ will happen” kind of thoughts. Instead, my brain simply commands, “Do ____,” and I always give in. It’s so loud in my head, and I can’t shake the feeling that I’m an imposter. Like I don’t belong here—like my presence on this app is an intrusion, invalidating everyone else’s struggles just by downloading it and daring to post. If anyone feels that way, if you think I’m intruding, I’m sorry. I only came here because I have no one to share my diagnosis with. Pouring my thoughts out, hoping someone might understand, feels less suffocating than journaling. Journaling is like letting a wound fester—each word burying the thoughts deeper, leaving them to decay in silence, for nobody to ever read but myself.
- Date posted
- 11w ago
So, I know my capacity to get fixated on things. And it's normally something that's relatively remote but, my latest issue is really getting to me and I was wondering if people have any advice. I'm avoiding getting too into specifics, as I don't want this to get reassurance-y but, in essence.. I came to the realisation recently that people who I'd been "friends" (feels like the wrong term now) when I was younger were not very nice people, and normalized a lot of very unpleasant behaviour towards other members of the group. They really normalized it, sold themselves as figures of authority, as older and more responsible and grown-up than others, and looking back, they acted horribly. And coming to this realisation, that I'd been manipulated into just accepting their behaviour has just... broken me. My OCD has latched onto it and I can't stop feeling irreversibly tainted by it. I've talked to others about it, and they've reassured me, told me it's not a big deal and that I hold myself to too high a standard, but none of that sticks. I feel better for a bit, then think 'Maybe when you told them you were skewing it to make yourself look better' or 'Did you leave out a crucial detail'. I keep ruminating over and over, trying to remember exactly how everything played out, trying to figure out if I fed into the behaviour, if I did something bad myself (because y'know, I feel like I was accepting of it at the time, so what does it say about my own values?). I know I need to stop doing all this if I want to improve, but then some part of me keeps saying 'So, you're just going to let yourself off the hook then?' Normally, I can rationalize my own fears to some degree, assure myself something won't happen, but the realness of the situation, and the fact I only came to understand the reality of it because the thought had been bothering me means it feels so much more all-encompassing. I know confessing in itself is a compulsion, but I keep feeling that if I'm not I'm somehow concealing what I 'really am' from others around me, and any positive interactions are me deceiving them in some way. I feel like I can't enjoy anything in life right now, and a good part of me feels I should not enjoy it ever again. If anybody has any advice on it, I'm all ears. Or even hearing if you relate to these feelings, I might appreciate the solidarity at least.
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond