Have any of you experimented with drugs and it made your ocd worse? I’ve had anxiety since I was very little. I remember being in 3rd grade and having intrusive thoughts, (though I didn’t realize that’s what they were until learning more about OCD more recently.) I would go to my mom crying/panicking that I didn’t know if I was gay or questioning whether I had sexual feelings for my dad or brother. I always thought of OCD as compulsive hand washing and the more stereotypical OCD symptoms. So, now I’m starting to realize that I thought I had just generalized anxiety but it’s actually ocd. I’m 25 and felt like for the most part I had gotten my anxiety under control or more manageable at least, it didn’t consume my life like it did when I was in high school. Then one day with my friends I tried ecstasy. It’s not even like I had a bad time on it or anything but literally a week after doing it, I started obsessing over how I felt while on it and how intense it was. I couldn’t stop obsessing and eventually told myself that the ecstasy forever messed me up and my brain will never go back to normal and of course went to google where I read some very scary things. I guess it was just panic attacks I was having. My doctor said that while she can’t diagnose me after one visit, this did sound like ocd and that my obsessions most likely aren’t a result of the drug and it was already a part of me, but the drugs brought it out in me. I am doing so much better than I was a year ago right after I took the drug but still some days I question if ecstasy made me go crazy and how would I know if it made me crazy

I’m new to treatment and only realized I have OCD a few months ago. I went through a tough and abusive marriage and ended up getting divorced. I had my first panic attack several years ago and ended up needing to go on Lexapro. This helped me significantly and allowed me to leave my partner. Several years later and I decided to stop Lexapro because I thought I was good to go. I’m in a very healthy relationship, have a great job, friends/family, go to the gym and have a wonderful life. It’s been about a year off the meds and I’ve had some panic, but I’ve been able to manage it. For some reason, the last three weeks has been really difficult for me. I have different spirals and different thought processes: what if I’m schizophrenic? What if I have a deeper mental disorder? What if I hurt someone? What if I need to leave my partner? What if I end up becoming so depressed that I end up hurting myself? My brain just goes from one what if to the next and once I conquer one, the next one pops up with even more intensity. I started taking NAC and inositol and I’m taking saffron during the day because I really don’t wanna go on back on medication but sometimes my thoughts scare me and I’m convinced that I’m not gonna get better and I know that’s just the OCD loop, but I’m wondering if this resonates with anyone else!

I’ve recently been struggling a lot with OCD. I have had OCD for a long time I just didn’t realize it until more recently. About seven months ago I developed panic attacks one day randomly at work. I thought I was having a heart attack and went to the hospital where they told me it was just a panic attack and I assumed I would snap out and be better within a few days. However it didn’t. Here’s where it gets scary, I was staying at my then boyfriends house while dealing with blurry vision, anxiety attacks everyday, and more (unsure of what was going on). But at some point I saw my bfs (pew pew 🔫) on his table and it sent me into an anxiety attack after sudden thoughts that I was going to hurt myself with it. I begged him to put it away when I’m not looking so I didn’t know where he put it. He did. These thoughts lasted for about four days but began to go away. (I thought that was it and I would be back to normal). Unfortunately though I ended up moving back in with my family when we couldn’t get my panic attacks under control in time for me to get back to work and pay bills. However, coming home brought up a lot of trauma from when I was kid. My anxiety got worse but I didn’t have those thoughts again. About two and half months ago though, I got sick and went to the hospital where they gave me steroid pills and a steroid shot but sent me into some kind of psychiatric event. Ever since then though, I have been suffering from harm OCD, I have had moments of intense anger that I usually have to completely walk away and go on my own because of how intense they are, and it feels like it’s getting worse. Today I felt fine until about and hour and half ago where I started to dwell on the fact that my suicidal thought was influenced by my OCD and at the moment my OCD is at the worst it’s been. This caused me to get suddenly really depressed and I started crying thinking about how I can’t handle this. I then saw a post talking about how suicide rates are high for people with this form of OCD and it made me question if I am mentally strong enough to pull through this. I fear that at times I’m getting worse. I have good days but I have a lot of bad days. Unfortunately this sent me into such a bad panic attack I went over to my nanas crying about how I can’t deal with this. I took a 0.25 mg Xanax which helped calm down the panic attack portion of it but my brain is still uncomfortably active. I guess I just need hope. I’m so saddened by this. It’s like my life took a total 360 in 10 months and got even worse since the steroid shot. Idk what to do about it. I can’t stop the spiral. I talk to two different therapist weekly and start more next week, making it 5 times a week. I feel no improvements…

So, I’ve had my OCD mostly “under control” for the past 10 years (I’m 44, battled this all my life). I’ve been on a high dosage of Luvox, but unfortunately it’s lost its effectiveness about 6 months ago. For the past five months I’ve also been doing therapy sessions on this site and have had a fairly good outcome. My main obsessions have mainly regarded around balance and symmetry. Anyhow, I’m in the process of switching to Prozac. It’s only been 6 days, so I obviously feel nothing yet. I made the foolish mistake of googling “What can antidepressants cause?” Unfortunately I found a very recent article of a study showing antidepressant users have a higher chance of getting ALS. There’s also older articles that say the opposite. But this one article FREAKED ME OUT. And I can only focus on the worst outcome. So, now I’m stuck in a repetitive thought pattern of getting ALS from the one medication that is supposed to help me. It’s absolutely terrifying and I haven’t experienced a health anxiety fear like this in years. I want to research more and more online, but I know this won’t help. It will only make things worse. Anyone with health anxiety have any advice on how to conquer this? I’m standing strong and not getting off my medication or doing any research.