NS1234
- Date posted
- 4y
CareeCaree
- Date posted
- 4y
I have had OCD almost my whole life but just began having ROCD mid last year. I have an intrusive thought that I cheated on my boyfriend in the beginning of our relationship. My biggest fear is losing him as I am head over heels in love with him. I get random thoughts and get triggered by random things that make me think I did cheat on him and it can be debilitating. However, my therapist has been helping me through it and my boyfriend is actually aware of my ROCD. He has been supportive too. I still have long ways to go in my recovery but I am trying everyday
NS1234NS1234
- Date posted
- 4y
So relatable . Wow thank you !
nervousbeansnervousbeans
- Date posted
- 4y
I'm going through something similar and I don't know how to deal with this anymore. I think I would remember doing something like this but I can't and the fact that I can't is making me anxious. How is therapy treating this?
CareeCaree
- Date posted
- 4y
@alwaysanxious That does sound similar to what I’m going through. So what my therapist has been using to treat this is ERP. It can be so hard and painful but it’s the only way. She has me think “what if this actually happened” “what if he deserves better” “what if he leaves me” etc. And then not ruminate and sit with the anxiety. I need to do better at this and do it more. But a way I am doing it is when I’m triggered by something random that makes me think I did it, I try not to figure it our and ruminate. I’m doing it right now, and it’s hard and frustrating but it’s the only way. Hope that helped!!
mmsully mmsully
- Date posted
- 4y
so my last relationship partially ended bc of my ROCD. my current relationship is a million times better and i’m crazy about my current boyfriend, which just makes it even scarier that my ROCD could start acting up again. every once in a while i’ll get feelings of “why don’t i feel the same way i did at the beginning” or “he said something that slightly annoyed me so i’m unhappy and we should just break up”. but he knows about my thoughts, and he knows how to help me through my worries. it’s a tough thing to bring up because you don’t want to hurt their feelings, but if your partner is open and understanding then that’s honestly the best way to handle it it my opinion. just let them know how you’re feeling, let them know that your feelings are just intrusive and not actually representative of your feelings for them. and by vocalizing that to them it’ll help you as well. hope that makes sense:)
NS1234NS1234
- Date posted
- 4y
Thank you so much for sharing. I deicided to share with him . But I’m just so scared of the thoughts and feelings that come with it. I literally was so happy and then the next day I flipped a switch
OCDismyMiddleNameOCDismyMiddl...
- Date posted
- 4y
Hey! :) I can offer some insight. My ROCD began a while ago when my mother (who is diagnosed with BPD) criticized my boyfriend about his neurological condition (it is called CMT, it's a condition that affects his balance but he is otherwise healthy). It sent me spiraling (because overbearing mothers have terrible effects on their children). At the time, I had no clue what ROCD was. But I posted to a subreddit about CMT and wow! I wish I hadn't haha. I was told to break up with him and that I'm a bad, ableist person that should burn in hell lol. The truth was that I had a mental illness. I was scared. I was seeking reassurance. All of this fueled my OCD. For months, it dragged on and on. I was worried about everything: did I love him? Is he attractive to me? Why doesn't sex or intimacy feel right with him anymore? Do I really care about him? What is love? What do I really want? Etc., etc. It wasn't until I moved out after college and began my own life that I realized it was OCD. I'm happy to report we are getting married in May, and I can't tell you how much I love that man. It took a hell of a lot of work, but my ROCD is in remission. I now deal with SOOCD, but I am making slow progress with it everyday. Bottom line: there's always hope and a silver lining. It does get better. You'll have good days and bad days - progress is not linear. Keep fighting. :)
NS1234NS1234
- Date posted
- 4y
Thank you so much for sharing this. It sounds just like what I’m experiencing and my ocd keeps saying what if I never snap out of it ? What if I can never love again? I’m just scared that the thoughts and feeling are actually real and not the ocd
OCDismyMiddleNameOCDismyMiddl...
- Date posted
- 4y
@Niki.s I totally get that. What's worse is that the feelings and thoughts are so real to you, you can't distinguish them. For a while, I actually believed the thoughts, I just thought that I'd have to live like that forever. Well, I'm here to tell you that don't, and there is hope. Is there a way you can find therapy? I suggest only seeking OCD specialists because not many people are knowledgable about the affects of OCD and what it truly means to live with it. Though you can certainly recover on your own, I've noticed that having a support team is very helpful. And if you can't afford it, that's fine. I'm always available on the app and if you need to vent just tag me. Hope you have a great night and try to focus on the positives.
NS1234NS1234
- Date posted
- 4y
@NOCD Advocate - Kylee C. Read below please sorry forgot to tag
NS1234NS1234
- Date posted
- 4y
You’re so right ! I’m going to look into the ocd specialists. I was so in love with my BF and then all of a sudden my brain flipped a switch before my period and is making me believe that all that warmth is gone and I don’t want to believe it and I don’t understand how it could be true ? How can it just change in a second for NO reason. I love him and the thought of leaving him completely ruins me
Related posts
melly07
- Date posted
- 20w
rOCD
I wanted to talk about my experiences with rOCD since I currently do still suffer from it but I know if I talked about them. My thoughts are just gonna get stronger, but I’ll do it for the sake of talking about my experiences to others who feel like they’re alone. I have a very loving relationship actually my first healthy relationship we are currently still dating one year and six months. I would say these intrusive thoughts started to happen once I hit the one year mark with him. Nothing in the relationship has made me think these thoughts, but it just came. Like when my mind tried to make me think I liked another guy other than my boyfriend and that I was losing feelings for him. I started to panic because I knew that my heart belonged to my boyfriend and having thoughts that were against that belief it made me really anxious cause I never had those thoughts before. I was in and out of the care center at my school constantly having anxiety attacks, and it was affecting me day by day. I talk to my boyfriend about it because my mind can never keep secrets from him because then I would feel like that I’m lying to him… my mind just kinda works that way and I believe it’s due to the situation I have with rOCD. Luckily, he was really supportive.. in thoughts I’ve had was what if I don’t like him anymore or if he doesn’t do this does that mean he likes me or if he’s even the one just a lot of doubts about me and him in the relationship. And for anyone who’s experiencing stuff familiar to this you are not alone invalid only what you believe is what is true. And I know it’s gonna be hard to know what’s true or not because these thoughts that you have versus what’s in your heart you get confused but if you know that you love that person then that’s what true. Also, the only reason why it affected me a lot was because I kept trying to solve it and the only solution is to let those thoughts in and accept that you have those thoughts. I don’t mean as an accept that these thoughts are true, but accepts that those are the thoughts that you’re thinking because if you keep on trying to find a solution to remove them, it only just get worse.
Madz!;)
- Date posted
- 18w
ROCD
If anyone can help.. I’m suffering from ROCD.. I love my partner I do. I cry when I talk to him about this, I cry when he compliments me now, just a constant gut feeling every time I think about him or know I’m going to see him. It’s just, I cry at everything, especially when I’m with him, like I’ll be cuddling him and then I’ll think, “do you love him?” And I panic and I cry/get teary eyed. It’s just the gut feeling won’t go away. Maybe I’m in the wrong relationship? Maybe I’m upset because I’m with the amazing guy and I don’t like him anymore. I don’t know I just got upset writing this.. he is so sweet. He is my first long-term relationship. Like 2 months ago, when this started, everything before this was fine. Like literally we were about to hit our 8 month mark and then the next day he complimented me and I thought “idk if I love you anymore..” I couldn’t eat, sleep, major gut feelings. I cried and had panic attacks. Idk I know this sound pathetic but I want to love him. I don’t know if this is me seriously falling out of love or if this is ROCD. I tried getting a therapist but I can’t afford it because they don’t take my insurance. My bf is aware of EVERYTHING, And he’s been by my side the past two months since this started, but he doesn’t have ocd and doesn’t understand, so if someone could help, I would really appreciate it!!.. I just don’t know what’s going on. I miss how things were before. Quiet and happy. And now it’s just crying, gut feelings, and mess.. hopefully I don’t sound harsh and mean, im just wanting answer in what to do..
soscaredofmy...
- Date posted
- 13w
ROCD
Hi, I’ve joined this app as I have started to experience persistent relationship doubts and if I love my partner anymore. I’m aware in myself I love my partner and want us to be together but the thoughts are so strong I feel as though I’m fighting with my head and my heart as my feelings are numb as I’m checking too often and I’m so scared and anxious of the thoughts being true as I cannot stop thinking about it because it’s so important to me but they’re starting to come as statements which is so scary, I just want to work it out . I know I’m making it worse by going over and over but I can’t get the fear out of my head , any advice or anyone to speak to who has felt the same would really be appreciated, Thankyou.
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