- Username
- Anonymous
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Awe I’m so sorry as I know this pain but mostly towards my wife. I left my family for one night when my ocd started and I didn’t know it was ocd because I felt like something was gonna happen even though I know I didn’t want to hurt her or anyone else. I cried like a baby. This condition can suck the life right out of you. That was a few days shy of a year ago. You have to face your fear to be able to get to the other side . It’s the last thing you wanna do but it’s what helps us to move on with living our life in spite of ocd.
Don't let it spoil all the good times your gunner have with your daughter Ive had this with all my family its shit but its not real good luck👍
Just know that ocd is a liar and you can be reunited with them . I know it seems impossible but people with ocd don’t do what they are afraid of. They do compulsions you leaving is a compulsion. You have to fight the ocd your life isn’t over treatment could be just beginning. Your family needs you
Avoidance is a compulsion I meant. I know you feel like a monster. Ocd feels so real I thought I was a pedophile and future murdurer but actually I’m a beautiful person who is an artist and daughter. I have overcome screaming in tears at my thoughts I would hurt children someday. I heard god in my heart tell me that it was ocd and to listen to my therapist that was may 27 two years ago and I have been free from the thoughts. I’m praying so hard for you . You can literally ask me anything I want to help
You guys are amazing . Thanks for the kind words. I will be reuniting very soon. I just wish it was that easy. Last time I was around my daughter my mind was running bad and I thought I was really going to hurt her. Also I know I love her but some reason I dont feel happy around her. It makes me feel so detached which scares me more!
It’s okay be easy on yourself as you didn’t ask for this and it’s not your fault. One day last summer I had a day where my was going frantic and had the obsession that I was gonna kill my wife that day and I was saying it out loud cause it was on repeat in my head and I was crying my eyes out. It sucked but I got through it and you can too!
Just know that you so love her even if you don’t feel like it I’m so proud of u even tho I don’t know u I know ocd is so hard that’s why bcuz ur fighting
I'm so scared right now, I don't think my intrusive thoughts are intrusive anymore. I feel completely numb and disconnected from everything and everyone. I feel like I'm insane. I don't feel reassured by anything which makes me think I want the thoughts. for example I have harm ocd thoughts about my daughter and always have since she was born, she is now 9. I've suffered terribly with mental health since she was born. and an intrusive thought I have just had is "if I killed her i wouldn't be anxious anymore" can thoughts become this distressing? this can't be normal, please someone help.
My heart hurts so much right now. I am a mother of two and I am afraid to be near my children. Two weeks ago, everything was fine. I never had an intrusive thought about them at all. My mother recently told me that my father SA’ed me and I do not remember it because I was too little to remember. Well, while trying to cope with that information… I had a terrible intrusive thought. “What if I become like my father?” “What if you’re attracted to you kids?” I instantly felt sick, I threw up and then I could NOT stop thinking. I keep getting this horrible sinking feeling near them. I keep crying and missing how simple it was before. I love them so much and it’s only pure mother love. I don’t even have any urges it makes no sense why I can’t let this thought go. I just want to go back to being their mommy. I was looking at videos of when they were tiny babies or even from a few weeks ago and just crying because it was just simple and life was amazing and I cherished my children… now I am afraid to be near them. I told my boyfriend because I was having such terrible anxiety from this and I’ve been in a dark place. He knows I’ve had other obsessions and panic attacks so he is being very helpful through this. He says he trusts me and knows I would never harm our kids. But I keep feeling so guilty for even having this thought at all.
Hi all. I opened up to my psychiatrist today (my therapist and ocd therapist know) about the intrusive thoughts I've been having. The one thought would pop up over and over "child porn" and it made me so sick to my stomach because I can't believe I would think of such a thing. Then the thoughts were more dark like thinking of touching my son and even images of that happening..then came urges...and i felt so guilty and disgusted with myself :( after I told my psychiatrist ( who is currently treating me for bipolar 1) he was so concerned and told me I need to stay with my mom to make sure my son is safe. To not trust myself and have someone watch me. Well that made me feel a whole lot worse! The thoughts were actually subsiding this week and talking about it with him made the "child porn" thought pop up again. I just feel like I'm failing at life and as a mother. My immediate family think I should turn myself into a mental health facility and have intensive treatment. They think because I have those thoughts that I want to act on them or to let it go. I don't want to act on them and would never! Im scared of my thoughts and thats the problem. This is so frustrating.
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