shh
- Date posted
- 4y
ARTnotOCDARTnotOCD
- Date posted
- 4y
🙋🏼♀️ Yup! That’s one of the ways OCD is explained. (It’s so much more complex than just that explanation, but I’ve seen it as one of the basic definitions in a psych class before.) As for what I do, or at least try to do (because Yoda didn’t know our OCD struggles😉) is to try to notice/realize that part of why I feel that way is my OCD. Then I can try to fight it. After 17.5 years with my partner and 20+ years of my family and I knowing I had OCD, I can also, in moments of clarity, try to reach out to them before I get stuck or while taking a break from being stuck to let them know how to help me that I don’t think will trigger me more. While I have a better support system with them than ever before, sometimes they still don’t get it. Now I am so lucky that I also have all the people on this app. We get it, and we’re here for you. Hope this helps. 💜
shhshh
- Date posted
- 4y
Thanks for your comments. It's not really losing control like I'm going to do something, it's being in control so that something bad doesn't happen or so whatever happens/is done the way I want it to. I have a hard time deciphering what's a compulsion in this case (other times I can see it) because it's usually logical or my brain thinks it is so I end up telling people, particularly my partner, what to do. Usually they're very supportive but sometimes they become frustrated which is a huge trigger to me. I'm not sure what to do.
ARTnotOCDARTnotOCD
- Date posted
- 4y
Yes, that’s the type of control I took it to mean. And yes, it is a risk because if your support system member is in the right headspace of her/his/their own, it’s so helpful, but if not, so triggering. That’s why it can be helpful to talk with them before you hit an OCD “attack”. Sometimes we’ve had a code word, so that if either of us says that, because non-OCD people can still come to us when they have a bad time, then we both know that the party saying it needs help or to breathe and collect to help the other. I even (again, ahead of time) came up with the best phrase for my partner to say if he noticed that I might be getting stuck. Because the last thing I need at that moment is to feel judged. So he may just ask, “How are you?” Or “would you rather do something else?” Maybe try which phrase is least triggering to you. Maybe for you it’s, “Do you really want to do it this way?” Or, “Why do you think it should be done like this?” Maybe you are even ok with a more direct, “Do you think this could be the OCD talking?” That’s not really a part of ERP, but maybe it’ll help you be more aware of what is OCD or to help you and your support system be most efficient and patient. Maybe it won’t help you at all. (See I’m trying to embrace uncertainty. 😉). But either way, you are totally not alone! Best wishes your way!
shhshh
- Date posted
- 4y
@ARTnotOCD Thank you, that's really helpful! I will try out integrating one of those phrases.
woeismewoeisme
- Date posted
- 4y
I'd say it depends on what exactly you do as compulsion and why you feel afraid of losing control. I have the fear too. I note down the compulsions that I frequently feel the urge to do (for me that's checking to see if I'm hallucinating, or delusional, ruminate on past actions) and I always try to remind myself what my exact fear is, what are the consequences of losing control? personally, I fear I'm gonna reveal heavy secrets I've told no one about. and cultivating this insight into why I do the compulsions greatly helps me see things objectively and it's easier to resist the compulsions, I actually don't check for hallucinations anymore. Anyways it's probably different for you but that's what I do
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