- Username
- shh
- Date posted
- 3y ago
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- Username
- ARTnotOCDARTnotOCD
- Date posted
- 3y ago
šš¼āāļø Yup! Thatās one of the ways OCD is explained. (Itās so much more complex than just that explanation, but Iāve seen it as one of the basic definitions in a psych class before.) As for what I do, or at least try to do (because Yoda didnāt know our OCD strugglesš) is to try to notice/realize that part of why I feel that way is my OCD. Then I can try to fight it. After 17.5 years with my partner and 20+ years of my family and I knowing I had OCD, I can also, in moments of clarity, try to reach out to them before I get stuck or while taking a break from being stuck to let them know how to help me that I donāt think will trigger me more. While I have a better support system with them than ever before, sometimes they still donāt get it. Now I am so lucky that I also have all the people on this app. We get it, and weāre here for you. Hope this helps. š
- Username
- shhshh
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Thanks for your comments. It's not really losing control like I'm going to do something, it's being in control so that something bad doesn't happen or so whatever happens/is done the way I want it to. I have a hard time deciphering what's a compulsion in this case (other times I can see it) because it's usually logical or my brain thinks it is so I end up telling people, particularly my partner, what to do. Usually they're very supportive but sometimes they become frustrated which is a huge trigger to me. I'm not sure what to do.
- Username
- ARTnotOCDARTnotOCD
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Yes, thatās the type of control I took it to mean. And yes, it is a risk because if your support system member is in the right headspace of her/his/their own, itās so helpful, but if not, so triggering. Thatās why it can be helpful to talk with them before you hit an OCD āattackā. Sometimes weāve had a code word, so that if either of us says that, because non-OCD people can still come to us when they have a bad time, then we both know that the party saying it needs help or to breathe and collect to help the other. I even (again, ahead of time) came up with the best phrase for my partner to say if he noticed that I might be getting stuck. Because the last thing I need at that moment is to feel judged. So he may just ask, āHow are you?ā Or āwould you rather do something else?ā Maybe try which phrase is least triggering to you. Maybe for you itās, āDo you really want to do it this way?ā Or, āWhy do you think it should be done like this?ā Maybe you are even ok with a more direct, āDo you think this could be the OCD talking?ā Thatās not really a part of ERP, but maybe itāll help you be more aware of what is OCD or to help you and your support system be most efficient and patient. Maybe it wonāt help you at all. (See Iām trying to embrace uncertainty. š). But either way, you are totally not alone! Best wishes your way!
- Username
- shhshh
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@ARTnotOCD Thank you, that's really helpful! I will try out integrating one of those phrases.
- Username
- woeismewoeisme
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I'd say it depends on what exactly you do as compulsion and why you feel afraid of losing control. I have the fear too. I note down the compulsions that I frequently feel the urge to do (for me that's checking to see if I'm hallucinating, or delusional, ruminate on past actions) and I always try to remind myself what my exact fear is, what are the consequences of losing control? personally, I fear I'm gonna reveal heavy secrets I've told no one about. and cultivating this insight into why I do the compulsions greatly helps me see things objectively and it's easier to resist the compulsions, I actually don't check for hallucinations anymore. Anyways it's probably different for you but that's what I do
Related posts
- Username
- Crissy
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Is anyone dealing with responsibility OCD? I donāt see it talked about much, but itās one of the subtypes I struggle with the most. I just feel like everything I do is in order to āprotectā my family and friends. That means everything from magical thinking, to repeatedly calling people to make sure theyāre ok, to bargaining with god to keep them safe (even though iām not religious at all). I spend A LOT of my time worrying about other people and trying to control what they do. For example, Iāll try to talk someone out of taking a trip because I feel like something bad will happen, or Iāll stalk someoneās Instagram to make sure theyāre posting regularly, because that means theyāre ok. Logically I know I have no control over other people, but OCD tells me thereās always at least SOMETHING I can be doing to keep them from getting hurt or sick. And obviously the pandemic has made this 1000x worse. Can anyone relate?
- Username
- IAmGoingToOv...
- Date posted
- 2y ago
Anger
Does anyone else fear getting so angry that you lose control? I fear this terribly. Iāve been having anger but I knows itās just because Iām so tired of OCD and dealing with having it. But I fear Iām going to snap and I donāt want to. Please tell me Iām not alone in this. I have a very short patience span, Iām always tensed up and the tiniest thing can make me so angry. I just donāt understand this.
- Username
- vmcgee
- Date posted
- 1y ago
Is it normal to grieve the loss of ācontrolā
I am working on overcoming one of my themes, and one of the things I have to tell myself is that no matter what I do (compulsions, etc) I canāt stop something bad from happening to me. I almost feel like I am grieving the loss of ācontrolā / āsafetyā that my OCD has falsely provided me with all this time.
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