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My therapist explained that humans do need a certain amount of confidence to accept an idea, and that’s ok. So most people will accept something as being true as long as they’re pretty confident of it. They understand that “sure, there’s a tiny possibility that such-and-such is not true” but that possibility is so unlikely that they just disregard it, and accept the idea as true. With ocd it’s just hard to discard that 1% chance (or whatever % chance). I’ve learned a few things that have helped me here—first, it’s ok if my brain needs logic and evidence to accept something. But I need to actually accept that evidence and just disregard any lingering fearful feelings that remain. When I have that evidence, it’s also vital that I stop the ruminating then and there. Finally, it’s become clear to me that some therapists don’t do as good of a job with language around “accepting uncertainty.” You’re not accepting uncertainty as if it’s 50/50. Nobody goes around thinking there’s a 50% chance they’re a pedophile. It’s more like people are 99.999% sure and they don’t get bothered by that 0.0001% chance, so it doesn’t even register to them. When I realized that’s how other people function, it helped me reframe my acceptance of incredibly minor, hypothetical possibilities and completely disregard them.
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To many people, I think it’s just something they don’t give a second thought about. But if they really delve into the thoughts like we do, they might realize that they could never really be sure about that. They’re just not anxiously attached to the idea, so it’s easier for them to brush it off and logically deduce that it was likely to never happen. I wonder the same thing about people who are always so sure their partners will never cheat on them or leave them. Like, where did you get all this trust and certainty from?! 😅
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This is also why habituation may only go so far. No rational person habituates to a real belief they’re a pedophile (or whatever). Habituation can be somewhat useful, but for me it’s really correcting irrational beliefs that cause frarvand then avoiding rumination (which is a mental compulsion) to keep any lingering fear from multiplying.
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*cause fear
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Before ocd got bad for me that was something I never ever thought about or had a doubt about. Now I’m constantly worried about being a p but I have to remind myself that I shouldn’t have to even ask myself that question cause if you take a step back it’s just not logical no matter how many weird thoughts cross your mind 🤷🏽♂️
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Yes but sometimes it feels logical :/
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@random_person I get that! It’s the same for me but that’s when you have to try your hardest to remember your values
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@thedude Thanks
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I gave up trying to figure out how neurotypical people operate 😅
Related posts
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 21w
Why does ocd make you feel uncertain about everything. Even the things you knew were 100% certain before. Its so bizarre. All the subtypes like Rocd, Pocd, Hocd you should be 100% certain about these things but ocd makes you feel like you dont know. I sit here know saying in my head I DONT KNOW. its so hard and confusing. I just want to know who I am. Am I a good person like I thought I was and have been my whole life or am I someone else. I just dont know. Its awful
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- 21w
Something I don’t really understand and it grinds my gears 🤣. I am a 110% certain on something that will never happen in my life time but my ocd won’t accept it? Like my heart feels yeah that’s never happening ever I a million years…. But my ocd is like nope I’m against your values and morals! It’s draining 😴
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- 16w
In Harm OCD, do you feel uncertain about your values because your intrusive thoughts questioned them so much? Earlier, I felt horrified whenever these thoughts popped up because I knew they were against my values. But over the past few months, I’ve had so many intrusive thoughts that questioned why I should believe my values. And that questioned if it really matters if I believe my values. Now I’m not sure if it’s OCD anymore because when I think about what my values are I’m really confused and not sure anymore. And if I think whether I would act on my thoughts I’m not sure and I don’t have an answer and I don’t feel horrified. Has anyone experienced this? I’m really concerned that it’s getting worse
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